New Alcohol self help

lewt

feelinggood wrote: »

I was orginally 'Feelingupset', but was advised to change my name and think more positively! Fat lot of good that has done.

It really doesn't feel like this is ever going to end. I know I need to change, but I don't know how to change. I'm praying every morning for the willingness, but it ain't working. I'm taking a daily inventory, and I'm constantly repeating the same negative behaviours (binging/purging, self-harm, casual sex). Sponsor says I need more help than she can give

Do you remember how quick you felt better when you first got sober feelie ? i do. are you saying step 3 prayer in the morning ? whats god's will for you today? it aint to be miserable.

sounds to me like your sponsor has copped out which happens we have to except that, why dont you get to a CA meeting and find some1 there to gudie you.. its big book too. done of this step a year/month cobblers. (easy does nothing)

bill and bob both did there steps in under 2 weeks. bob was out making ammends the night he finshed...

but back to my question are you gettingout and carrying the message or are you thinking "why me, etc" while your out helping others your side is taken care of. thats gods job.

brodev

Hello Feely. I have been checking every day to see if you have been posting but there has been no sign of you. I hope that you are "Feelingbetter".

lewt

how it going vik?

vik6525 wrote: »

*creeps in as ive never posted on here before*


Can I join in too please?

vik6525

lewt wrote: »

how it going vik?

Hey! Im good.... A bit weird being 'normal' on a Sunday though I have to admit.... I keep waiting for the hangover to 'kick in'...

lewt

vik6525 wrote: »

Hey! Im good.... A bit weird being 'normal' on a Sunday though I have to admit.... I keep waiting for the hangover to 'kick in'...

Well done when was the last time?

vik6525

lewt wrote: »

Well done when was the last time?

The last time I didnt have a hangover on a sunday? honestly?



Since I was 17....

feelinggood_2

brodev wrote: »

Hello Feely. I have been checking every day to see if you have been posting but there has been no sign of you. I hope that you are "Feelingbetter".

Thanks

I'm still incredibly low. Really struggling at the moment, and I'm not really doing everything I should be. All I'm really able to do is focus on not drinking/using/cutting. Incredibly difficult, and I'm just trying to cling on till the 9th, when I get to see my Pysch again, and hopefully go back on medication. This withdrawl has nearly killed me.

feelinggood_2

lewt wrote: »

Do you remember how quick you felt better when you first got sober feelie ? i do. are you saying step 3 prayer in the morning ? whats god's will for you today? it aint to be miserable.

sounds to me like your sponsor has copped out which happens we have to except that, why dont you get to a CA meeting and find some1 there to gudie you.. its big book too. done of this step a year/month cobblers. (easy does nothing)

bill and bob both did there steps in under 2 weeks. bob was out making ammends the night he finshed...

but back to my question are you gettingout and carrying the message or are you thinking "why me, etc" while your out helping others your side is taken care of. thats gods job.

Hi Lewt. I am being lazy I suppose. I just have absolutely no desire to do anything. Its a struggle enough to get out bed, let alone leave the house or pick up the phone.

And I didn't feel good when I first got sober. 9 months of pure agony without a drink before I got to a meeting. Pink cloud lasted a while, but I've not really had much happiness in sobriety.

Not sure if its just me head, or if its right, but I keep thinking that this obviously isn't my time to get sober - maybe my rock bottom wasn't bad enough, maybe I need to go back out and do some more research, maybe I'm not an alcoholic etc.

feelinggood_2

brodev wrote: »

Hi Feelie, I noticed your earlier post and thought "I don't know what to say". The truth is I do know how you feel. Getting sober was, for me, great at first then having to deal with life and reality without the help of alcohol really sucked. I was full of buttons that got reactions when pushed. I needed constant reassurance that I was liked/loved. I knew what went on in my own head and that if anybody ever found out that they would think me as mad or bad or even both. I don't know what caused these feelings. I only know I had them and I felt bad. I had to eventually accept that I was totally, completely and utterly powerless over alcohol and that I could not manage my own affairs (drunk or sober). I needed help and I got that in AA. It was pointed out to me that as long as I hung on to the option of drinking then I was going to have to fight that. It was only by total surrender and by giving up the option of drinking that I would be relieved of that obsession. It seems to me that you may not have done this. I suggest that if you haven't, then that you now consider doing it. I wish you every success

I thought I did completely surrender. As far as alcohol is concerned anyway. I dunno, I'm just pretty disheartened at not being able to exsist without 'anything'. Annoyingly, feels like I'm going to loose my sobriety because I can't/won't give up my other addictions. I just feel like jacking it all in and giving up.

lewt

vik6525 wrote: »

The last time I didnt have a hangover on a sunday? honestly?



Since I was 17....

brilliant achivment then......