Toddler behaviour

Rev

KARO wrote: »

Good grief. Sounds like they need Supernanny!

It's certainly not 'normal' for a 3 year old to be so aggressive.

I know. I've honestly never seen anything like it. And I worked in a play group for a few years.

I was truly gobsmacked by it. I know at three they can be a handful but his behaviour was just outrageous.

His nan after a few hours seemed to have had enough she told him off and sat him on the chair. This lasted all of three seconds at which time he proceeded to kick her in the stomach and call her names that would have a sailor blushing.

He treated the furniture like a climbing frame, throwing all the cushions off the sofa and jumping up and down on the coffee table.

After I left I thought for a second that surely I'd imagined it. Because I honestly can't comprehend why a parent would allow their child to act like that. I felt especially bad for those who have him a gift only to have it thrown in their face and him screeching eff off (he actually screamed eff off fat a*** at one relative) at them.

enthusiasticsaver

Goodness me some descriptions of badly behaved and poorly parented children on this thread! None of this I would consider is normal behaviour from a child. Most aggression from children either comes because they themselves have either been on the receiving end of it from parents, elder sibling or other relative or they have seen it and it is considered normal behaviour. Ignoring this is stacking up problems for the future.


Child raising is not rocket science but does require firm discipline and attention to good behaviour and ignore bad behaviour and have a punishment programme in place which you stick to all the time. Naughty step, withdrawal of tv privileges or whatever gives the firm message that certain behaviour is unacceptable. If a parent ignores spitting, biting, throwing things, shouting at people etc then they will think this is ok and will only get worse as they get older.

Blackpool_Saver

Some people seem to be afraid of children now...... I think they can tell

Blackpool_Saver

notanewuser wrote: »

Isn't that enough?

No, nothing like enough, we should bring back firm consistent discipline, including corner time, naughty chairs, a firm whack on the backside and no should mean NO

GwylimT

This sounds like my daughter who I often refer to as a creature from the deep, she was a very aggressive toddler, much more than the fairly common little slaps or grabs. We only discovered when she was two months shy of four that she has abscence epilepsy, as soon as it was under control not only did the aggression stop other things we hadn't necessarily notice did as well, such as odd use of language and a fear of sitting in chairs etc on her own.

bouicca21

Corner time? Naughty chair? Whack on the backside?

I never found any of these necessary. likewise withdrawal of privileges and 'grounding' for the older ones. It's all to do with consistency and instilling self discipline. Plus of course Understanding age appropriate behaviour.

If the stories of behaviour described above are accurate, and aren't exaggerated by people who don't understand that toddlers can't be expected to sit still for long periods and behave like robots, and if the behaviour is a not one off caused by the stress of the occasion, then we are talking about children with serious problems that require investigation to discover an underlying cause, which might be abuse, might be medical, or might even be a parent overwhelmed with depression.

notanewuser

Blackpool_Saver wrote: »

No, nothing like enough, we should bring back firm consistent discipline, including corner time, naughty chairs, a firm whack on the backside and no should mean NO

Don't forget hanging, the plague and the workhouse too. It's a Victorian revolution, folks!!!

AngelOfTheNorth

One thing that's not been mentioned yet, sometimes when toddlers act up like that, they're communicating that they can't cope with the situation for whatever reason and need to leave. It sounds like there were probably more people than he's used to being around, in a fairly small space. If he doesn't get out of the house much, that will be unusual to him and could potentially be both exciting and worrying to him. He may have needed his caregivers to take him out to calm down. Mine is a few months younger and I don't think she'd do this, although she did go through a biting phase about a year ago. But she does sometimes get very silly and or screamy when the occasion is getting too much for her. If you think how a lot of adults find big Christmas gatherings a bit much sometimes, it's no surprise that someone not much more than a baby could have difficulty too.

j.e.j.

notanewuser wrote: »

Don't forget hanging, the plague and the workhouse too. It's a Victorian revolution, folks!!!

Don't know about the workhouse, I think some of them need an exorcist :eek::rotfl:

Rev wrote: »

His nan after a few hours seemed to have had enough she told him off and sat him on the chair. This lasted all of three seconds at which time he proceeded to kick her in the stomach and call her names that would have a sailor blushing.
<snip for brevity>
I felt especially bad for those who have him a gift only to have it thrown in their face and him screeching eff off (he actually screamed eff off fat a*** at one relative) at them.

Rev wrote: »

I spent Christmas Day at my cousins and her youngest is 3. No joke, he was like some type of feral child. Spitting at people. Hitting, kicking and punching people. Throwing plates at the window. Pulling the Christmas tree over. Whacking his elder brother in the face with a shoe. If at any point he was told 'no' all hell broke loose.


People were bringing gifts. If it wasn't what he wanted he would throw the gift on the floor and actually tell the poor astonished gift giver to eff off.


He didn't want his dinner so threw it in his uncles face. he whacked the poor dog so hard she yelped on more than one occasion.

GetOut wrote: »

Later on as we were in the midst of playing again, he suddenly spat in my face :eek: I was beyond astonished and backed off straight away to which his response was to walk after me and carry on spitting.

Also, throughout the day he kept on walking up to my 6yo son shouting at him and lashing out by kicking and hitting which I allowed none of and quickly took nephew away to one side.

meritaten

I hate being one of those old ladies who say 'Kids never behaved like that in MY day'. But, I think I must. it wasn't just because parents were very quick with a 'slap', but I really don't think that some children these days are subject to ANY discipline at home. Kids seem to rule the roost these days. and this is down to parents being hoodwinked by so called 'child experts' spouting psychobabble about 'labelling', constricting behaviour, inhibiting natural childhood behaviours, etc. and the frowning upon of ANY disciplinary measures. young children cannot be reasoned with, they need boundaries and they need consequences - because we see the results of a generation of children who have grown up without this - they are the ones subject to ASBOs, they are the ones teachers cant control, they are the ones running around the streets at all hours making neighbours lives a misery.
They also seem to exhibit 'hyper' behaviour - and this is, I believe, down to the sheer amount of 'junk' that they eat. Yes, I am coming across as a miserable old beetch, but, I was brought up in the 1950s by very old-fashioned parents and although my own kids had a more relaxed style of parenting from myself and OH - we still believed in boundaries and rules and consequences. and I am very proud of my kids - good, law-abiding kids who are now raising their own families.
sorry for the rant - but some of the replies on here have really pushed my buttons - some posters seem to disapprove of the mildest of disciplinary measures! I just wonder how their kids behave!