12-24 weeks pregnant (part 4)

ThinkPink

Glad the scan went well and congratulations on a little boy.

Ok, so do I need to get used to people touching my belly? Saw someone I'm very close to today and they straight away commented about my bump then touched it, whilst this person is very excited I really don't want people touching me unless I give permission(ie maybe when they start kicking I will let certain people feel). Polite ways of asking people not to touch me would be much appreciated!!!

We will start to buy things after my scan, I'll probably just get things as and when I see good deals to start with.

crazy-cat-lady_2

Snap. Total sympathy. I HATE people touching my belly. I actually snapped at someone for it. If it's people I know, they know I don't like it and don't do it. When she's kicking I will tell them it's ok. But I hate the idea of strangers doing it. Like strangers leaning into prams and looking at babies without the parent saying they can. I can see I'll be snapping at people for that in the future too.
I don't have any polite ways to ask them to stop. I think if someone touches my stomach randomly, I'll do the same to them and say "how do you like it?" You can always blame the hormones!

Scan all good. Really Clear. Biggest and clearest we have ever seen. Amazing. She is still a she! The other sonographer said so too. So we can buy and decorate. 20 minute scan, all insides are ok. The only problem is with me sadly. Low lying placenta. So I have to have a scan at 36 weeks. If it hasn't moved up, which it often does they say, I'll need a c-section. Which I did always want anyway. No harm or risk to her, I've got to take it very easy is all. Which I can live with.

pigpen

No.. tell them you are not a petting zoo.. and do it back... see if they like it!!

I have slapped a few people for touching!

rinroo

congrats on the scans :j Freddie it's nice to hear of a blue bundle as there's seems to have been a really big run on pink bumps at the moment. Almost everyone I know who is pregnant are pregnant with girls

I am probably an exception but I don't mind about people that I know touching my bump. My sisters all have a prod and a few girls at work give it a little rub or a pat and say a little "hello" . But, I've never experienced it with a stranger - I suppose I would be uncomfortable with that - but I couldn't imagine a stranger doing that.

Suffering with fat ankles at the minute - not fun. I'm also beginning to feel it sat on my office chair for 8 hours a day now. I feel like I'm walking like John Wayne after a few hours :rotfl:
Work have provided me with a chair cushion and foot stool but i'm still suffering. The joys of pregnancy I guess.

FreddieFrugal

Did anyone watch the first episode of 'Five Star Babies'? About the Portland hospital?

Was shocked by the nursery service! Just can't believe that anyone would actually choose to have someone else taking care of their baby away from them so soon after birth.

zarf2007

FreddieFrugal wrote: »

Did anyone watch the first episode of 'Five Star Babies'? About the Portland hospital?

Was shocked by the nursery service! Just can't believe that anyone would actually choose to have someone else taking care of their baby away from them so soon after birth.

Yes we watched that.....long time lurker, my wife is 14 weeks pregnant....I suppose from their point of view the baby/child will likely spend most of their life with a nanny anyway so why inconvenience the mother with a thing like a crying baby now

Unfortunately a lot of the mothers on that programme seemed to view having a child as the latest fashion accessory!

I must admit the scenes of childbirth did absolutely terrify my wife who has a very low pain threshold. She would ideally like a c-section (I know this is frowned upon for anything other than medical issues) for that reason but as an NHS patient we don't get that option so I guess she will have to cope somehow..

I was impressed with the food and facilities that the portland offers but then I guess money buys most things

I think the thing that spooked my wife was the fact that the woman who had flew in from Saudia Arabia had had a miscarriage at 5 months previously (obviously this is rarer after 3 months but can still happen right up to the birth) but I guess people think after they get past the 3 months mark there is nothing to worry about, however far from it.

We had a scan recently at UCLH and can't complain so far about the service as was very thorough and the facilities very modern but obviously doesn't compare to the portland!

FreddieFrugal

zarf2007 wrote: »

I suppose from their point of view the baby/child will likely spend most of their life with a nanny anyway so why inconvenience the mother with a thing like a crying baby now

I know, but that's awful. The lady who looked after the babies in the nursery said that 'the babies don't care who's looking after them as long as they're being looked after.'

Which is completely incorrect, they may be clean and dry but there are benefits that a baby receives from close contact with the mother that happen at a much deeper level and cannot be replaced.

(Like how research has found that children adopted at birth, who in theory never knew their mother, so shouldn't feel any loss, and are raised by a loving supportive family, - the break of that bond between mother and child still affects them and causes deep rooted trauma that can impact their development throughout childhood)

It's the fact that one mother returned to her work almost straight away.

Now I understand that there can be pressures on a mother to return to work, and some people have no option but to have their baby in someone else's care.

We're not on a high income and OH is the higher earner at the moment. So on my wage plus SMP, we'd barely scrape along.

However we have scrimped and saved on weekly shopping, always shopped around, been thoroughly MSE AND sacrificed things like holidays or new cars etc. So that we have enough saved up to tide us through the first year so she can take her full entitlement to maternity leave and the baby can have his mother for as long as possible before we'll need to start thinking about childcare.

Because that is the most important thing to us. We want a child because we want the change in lifestyle. We want a family. Now I know not everyone is in a position where they have additional money to save regardless of how much they scrimp.

But the reason she gave was the pressure to be back to normal as soon as possible. There were no financial constraints. They were loaded!

Compare the photos at the end. One family (the mother who chose to keep her baby with her overnight) all together.

The a photo of the Chinese mum back at her fashion role. And a photo of her baby son by himself, wearing expensive clothes and in lavish surroundings but on his own.

Afraid he's going to be one of these children that appears superficially to have the perfect lifestyle. All needs catered for expensive holidays and things. But deep down is suffering trauma and attachment issues due to the emotional distance of his parents. Who have no interest in family, just their careers.

Straight after birth. She didn't even want to see her baby until he'd been fully cleaned up and wearing a nappy. Not even a little glance at him. I mean seriously!!??

Beckyy

Congratulations on your wiggly baby boy Freddie! I hope OHs sickness has eased off now. How did baby measure in comparison to your and the dating scan calculations?

Have you had your massage yet ThinkPink?

We have our gender scan tomorrow, really looking forward to it now.

I was quite confident on the due date I'd initially worked out so was surprised they dated baby 12+4 at our 12 week scan, maybe he/she had just had a growth spur. Although in the grand scheme of things a few days either way is neither here nor there!

I didn't see Five Star Babies, will keep an eye out. I haven't watched One Born Every Minute, some people have told me never to watch it because and others seems to absolutely love it.

FreddieFrugal

She didn't do a crown to rump measurement this time Beckky.

They measured lots of different lengths across parts of the skull, and the leg bones.

The measurement were ever so slightly different, ranging from 14w6 to 15w3

But she said all of the measurements were pretty much in the 'perfect' range for the dates of the baby. You see so much more at this stage!

She showed us the chambers of the heart, the kidneys. Spine with all the ribs coming off like oars on a boat. Could see the bones in arms, legs, fingers and toes. The skull was also really clear. Plus the movements are so amazing, the baby is so active.

Really obviously a boy at this stage too! No doubting it

euronorris

zarf2007 wrote: »

I must admit the scenes of childbirth did absolutely terrify my wife who has a very low pain threshold. She would ideally like a c-section (I know this is frowned upon for anything other than medical issues) for that reason but as an NHS patient we don't get that option so I guess she will have to cope somehow..

It's my understanding that whilst a C-section is painless at the time, it is very painful afterwards, and for weeks at that. At least, that's what my friends and sisters tell me. So if it's pain she wants to avoid, a C-section may not be the best option anyway.


There are lots of pain relief options for natural labour. If your wife is concerned about the pain aspect, this is something she can discuss with her midwife. Probably best to let the medical professionals know asap, and ask lots of questions so she can make the most informed choice possible about what type of pain relief she would like.


I think they go over a lot of this during antenatal classes too (not having mine until 4th May, but I think that's one of the things they cover off).