Thank you letters - AIBU

Flossie.

Gloomendoom wrote: »

If you have to ask "Am I being unreasonable?" often enough to feel the need to use an acronym, there is a good chance that you are being unreasonable.

:rotfl::rotfl::T Now I know what it means. Ta

maman

hawk30 wrote: »

I don't get the need to send a thank-you card to someone that you have already thanked in person (unless it's a very special occasion, such as a wedding). So I would say that it's fine.

If the occasion is special enough for a present then isn't it special enough for a thank you?

MrsAtobe

You've been thanked twice, once in person when they opened the present, and thanked again the next day! Just how many times do you need to be thanked? I do think that you are being unreasonable in this instance, yes.

Flossie.

GobbledyGook wrote: »

AIBU to think a verbal (super excited) thank you in person when a present was opened and a telephone call the day after the party thanking you for coming AND another excited thank you from the child during the call means you don't need a letter?

The child is 4 and currently has a broken arm, if that makes a difference (the letter would be written by a parent - child can't!)

Sorry I forgot to answer the original question LOL.

If someone thanked me verbally for something: child or adult; I would not expect a letter or card no. Even a text, tweet or FB message would do. Any acknowledgement would be OK.

No need for a letter IMO. Not when you have already been thanked verbally. I know the older generation seem to expect/want letters, when they have sent a gift, but I think it's a dying tradition tbh. Can't see the point if you have been thanked verbally. (Or when the unopened gift was given.) I think if you are giving, just to get thanks and recognition, and a thank-you letter. I am not sure that's a good reason to give.

JMO.

penguingirl

I wouldn't expect it, but that doesn't mean I wouldn't appreciate a card.

My friend has done photocards of her baby daughter- everyone who gives her anything gets sent a card, even if they have seen her in person (which most have). I visited her twice in the year she was on maternity leave and got different photocards (first was a very newborn photo, second was a more recent one). She didn't need to do it, but I happily have the most recent one sat on my mantelpiece.

I think if it crossed my mind to send a thank you, I'd do it. At the same time, I think presents should be given generously and without strings- so you shouldn't expect a thank you letter if you have been thanked in person.

Mrs_Soup

I can't see the need for a written thank you if the giver was thanked in person. Thank you notes are for gifts that are sent. They are nice for weddings because are a huge rigmarole for all concerned.

pleasedelete

victory wrote: »

What?:rotfl: never seen that abbreviation , heard obvs and had to google that one and it means obviously:o I'm obviously too old for these abbreviations:rotfl:

Its a mumsnet thing. Its all very muesli, ski chalet and paranoia.

Alikay

A thank-you in person when the gift was given/received and a follow up phone call would be perfectly sufficient IMO. However I know someone who is a real stickler for good manners and etiquette. He would also expect a letter (the more obsequious the better), and would complain if one were not received within the required number of days. It seemed very bad manners on his part to chase up and remonstrate on the occasion it fell short, but hey ho.....

I think our kids were very pleased when this relative ceased sending the birthday tenner as the stress surrounding the required grateful essays and rapturous phonecalls started to outweigh any pleasure in receiving the gift.

hgotsparkle

I always ha to write thank you letters at xmas and birthdays. I remember before I was allowed to open anything from distant relatives that weren't present on the day of opening, my mum would make me wait until she had a pad and pen so she could write who got me what, and then one present from my mum would be a new letter writing set, and I'd have to sit and write a long detailed letter about how great the said gift is. I hated it, and its made me hate getting gifts!

When I have kids, I'll do the photocard thing and get them to write a thank you and their name inside. No essays!

GobbledyGook

I've never been on mumsnet. The acronym was one I learned on here, but that's beside the point.

Thank you to those who answered.

The present was opened in front of the person who gave it, the thank you was given right away (in form of a super excited child saying 'thank you thank you thank you' and giving them a hug) as well as the telephone call the next day.

Normally the children do write thank you notes (using an acronym on a forum doesn't stop me being a stickler for manners), but OH mentioned on the phone that DS wouldn't be this time because he can't write due to his cast and injured fingers and hand. That's why DS was on hand whilst he telephoned everyone.

They are now bumping their gums at the lack of manners from the children and how they travelled 'all that way' (6 miles) and didn't even get a letter.