family church wont marry me, it only serves students

Yorkie1

theoretica wrote: »

It might be worth also discussing if a special licence would help:
http://www.facultyoffice.org.uk/special-licences/obtaining-a-special-marriage-licence/

This is for CofE venues, not Catholic or non-public/non-CofE ones, I think?

Mojisola wrote: »

It isn't a public church - it's a Chaplaincy to Manchester Metropolitan University, Royal Northern College of Music and The University of Manchester.

TBagpuss wrote: »

OP, I think it would definitely be worth your while to try to speak personally to the chaplain. They may be willing to discuss ways in which you could achieve your wish, and also, if you speak to them directly you can also ask them whether enrolling for a part time court would qualify you, and whether, if you cannot be married there, they would be willing to perform a blessing for you.

You can also double check whether the fact that they are able to perform marriages by 'kind permission of the diocese of Salford' means tha you would also need to get the Bishop's approval if the chaplain turns out to be willing to carry out the ceremony for you.

If you cannot find a way forward, perhaps you and your fiance could arrange o attend a service at the chaplaincy the Sunday before your wedding, or for the first mass afterwards, so that you can feel that you have involved it, and your family links, in the wedding, even if the ceremony cannot take place there.

Good suggestions but again I don't think the Diocese has any jurisdiction?

duchy

Or maybr religious people would feel no need to judge her on where she wishes to marry and wish her well in finding common ground with the chaplain to make it possible.

I'm sick and tired of people marrying in church who don't ever set foot in a church for anything other than weddings and christenings. I hope the church finds a way as it would be a far more meaningful ceremony than a student couple who pick it for it's proximity to the SU for drinks after.

bazzyb wrote: »

Rubbish. If anything, non-religious people would be more supportive of her getting married married there because they think it is a nice tradition for her to do so at the same place as her parents. Religious people would think it was far more important to marry at the church she actually attends and has connections with.

If the church was genuinely significant to the family, they would have been aware long ago that it no longer functioned as a 'normal' church.

bylromarha

I know the desire.

I got married in a church building where I was christened and where my dad was buried. I moved heaven and earth to wed there.

I was a member of a church 170 miles away at the time of my wedding.

If they wont let you wed there under the current terms, then become a student, get a blessing there after a informal registry office wedding, do whatever it takes and is legal! Some dreams need to be fought for.

skintchick

I was wondering what my church would do in this circumstance, as we only ever marry members of our own congregation, but I think it's possible our Pastor would marry you considering you are a) practising Christians and b) have some strong links with the church.

I'd go and ask the pastor/vicar/whatever and see if they can do anything for you; the blessing idea might be a goer if they won;t do the actual marriage ceremony.

Person_one

duchy wrote: »

I hope the church finds a way as it would be a far more meaningful ceremony than a student couple who pick it for it's proximity to the SU for drinks after.

Yes, you can't drive down Oxford Road without having to brake for drunk brides stumbling out of the SU in their wedding dresses.

Homeownertobe

duchy wrote: »

I'm sick and tired of people marrying in church who don't ever set foot in a church for anything other than weddings and christenings. I hope the church finds a way as it would be a far more meaningful ceremony than a student couple who pick it for it's proximity to the SU for drinks after.

I'm sick and tired of my tax money going toward someone else's personal religious choices. As soon as you stop taking public money, then you can become a private organisation and make your own rules.

duchy

Homeownertobe wrote: »

I'm sick and tired of my tax money going toward someone else's personal religious choices. As soon as you stop taking public money, then you can become a private organisation and make your own rules.

What on earth are you babbling on about ?
I haven't even stated what my religion is -if any.
My comment was about hypocrisy not faith.

But for the record no I don't belong to the church of England -sorry to disappoint you !

Perhaps you'd like to post citations as to where taxpayers money contributes to CoE churches though !

Homeownertobe

duchy wrote: »

What on earth are you babbling on about ?
I haven't even stated what my religion is -if any.
My comment was about hypocrisy not faith.

But for the record no I don't belong to the church of England -sorry to disappoint you !

Perhaps you'd like to post citations as to where taxpayers money contributes to CoE churches though !

As was mine - as evidenced by the 'general you'.;)

But as you asked so nicely - https://www.churchofengland.org/about-us/funding/wherefrom.aspx

Newly_retired

Ok, so that's a reference to Gift Aid, which is a tax rebate that any charitable organisation can claim back from HMRC.

de_g.

Mrs de g. and I married in our University Chaplaincy some time after we'd both graduated. In our case we went to see the University (CoE) Chaplain who was more than willing to accommodate us.

Because it isn't a parish church, they couldn't read the Banns, so instead we had to get a Special License from the Archbishop of Canterbury. The register was borrowed from the parish church which the University is in, but otherwise it was a normal church wedding. The Chaplain helped us with all that - he was happy as it was the first wedding he'd done in his time in the role.

Generally, it's a Church of England thing - you have to demonstrate a connection with the Parish and the Church. In your case, I suggest getting in touch with the University Chaplain and arranging to go and see him/her. This isn't about money though, and resorting to those kinds of offers is unlikely to convince them of your sincerity.