Elderly relative

Hopalong1

Hello


I'm not sure if this is in the right forum, please let me know, or move it if not, thank you.


I am looking after an elderly relative (let's say relative A to protect identity), effectively acting as power of attorney, but without the full legal protection.


I have so far been visiting in hospital, bringing all needs like toiletries, clothes, wipes, tissues, papers, and offering comfort and reassurance, contacting staff including OT, who have visited the home to assess needs, discussing previous medical history and concerns, and also arranging works which have to be done to make the property of the relative safe (as social services got involved and deemed it unsafe in present condition).


They asked the relative to go to a home temporarily, as although Relative A wants to go home quite naturally, doesn't seem to be aware of how dangerous or disruptive works will be in present condition. Relative A has agreed.


This has also meant that I have been paying bills with the agreement of relative A, who has signed cheques, had everything explained and shown to him regarding receipts, quotes, bills, etc.


Another relative expressed alarm that if anything happens to Relative A, then we would have to pay the works i.e., if health deteriorates or worst case, dies, we have signed for works and have to pay. They said to protect both ourselves and Relative A, we should apply for POA. Explained all this Relative A, who agrees, and we have now contacted a solicitor. An unbiased 'third party' from the solicitor is visiting Relative A shortly.


All well and good for both our legal protection.


However, we have since discovered (SS asked us for a financial statement before he entered the residential home) that Relative A has been encouraged to invest the majority of his savings (approx. 95%) in Stocks and Shares, which we felt was very risky, given his age - 81, and that he might be better to at least have some of this in a savings account which would give him interest (although smaller returns), in case he needs access to his funds for care either at home or in a residential home. Relative A also gives all his statements to the FA instead of keeping a copy at home.


Also, he seems very dependant on this particular FA, and wants the FA involved. The FA has been on close terms with Relative A, giving lifts, etc. and Relative A thinks a lot of the FA.


We are a bit concerned, firstly, as Relative A was living in atrocious conditions which the FA must have been aware of in picking Relative A up to take to financial office and back, yet continued to invest savings, secondly, as FA disputes that Relative A is still unwell "That I have been to visit and Relative A is absolutely fine" a one hour visit in 3 weeks, when we have been attending daily, and should be returned home asap.


Relative A has had a major operation, some complications e.g. chest infection, and continuing low blood pressure, being advised not to walk without a frame. The staff in hospital were suggesting 24/7 care, although Relative A has improved a lot with very good food, own room, etc at the current residential home.


Unfortunately, Relative A always refers every decision to this FA, even when agreeing with what is discussed. Despite the fact that we are doing everything, and the FA has only turned up once, not returning calls when Relative A has asked us to bring decisions to the FA. Kind of worried that Relative A is too dependant on the FA, thinks FA is a friend, when we feel, sadly, that the FA has investment commission more in mind.


I am all for non-biased third party involvement in POA, just doubting the FA has relative A's best interest's in mind.


Sorry for the long ramble. After explaining everything about POA and that Relative A should ask questions, make sure everything is understood, for all our legal protection, still asked us how FA was concerned! Told us that would contact FA to ask, which is their right, but now wonder if FA will advise Relative A against it.....


I really want Relative A to ensure has enough funds for care, wherever this comes from, and worried for their future.


Any advice appreciated thanks in advance

BigAunty

Does the FA belong to the IFA organisation and is there a complaints procedure?

Mr_Toad

Get a solicitor to speak to A and explain the options, the FA does not need to be part of that or if A insists then make sure that both the FA and the solicitor are present.

Is there any hint that the FA has misappropriated any of A assets?

Have a look at

http://www.preventelderabuse.org/elderabuse/fin_abuse.html

http://www.napsa-now.org/policy-advocacy/world-elder-abuse-awareness-day/

Skintmama

What a difficult situation, as of course your relative is entitled to do as they wish with their money.

It sounds as if you are concerned that the FA is financially exploiting your relative though and may advise against the extra layer of protection you hope to put in place with POA. I wonder if there is any way in which you can check this person out?

Maybe you would find it helpful to discuss this with someone at AgeUk or Action on Elder Abuse?

I wish you luck and hope that the presence of a third party from the solicitor will help to make the process smoother.

These kinds of situations do seem to highlight the importance of establishing POA arrangements long before they are actually needed. Although sadly they too can be tools for abuse.

z.n

So long as your relative has capacity it is their decision whether to do a POA. However, it is clearly in his best interests to have a POA in place so if the IFA puts him off the idea (or heaven forbid suggests himself as attorney) that would indicate possible lack of capacity. At which point he would need a social worker to act on his behalf pending a court appointed attorney. Expensive and time consuming I would imagine.

So I suggest you take each step as it comes- no point worrying about possible problems- see if A will sign the POA first (and is confirmed to have capacity.) Once that is done then look at the investments and get independent advice about what is best. No point prodding the hornets nest until the POA is in place. One step at a time- or you will combust from stress.

Hopalong1

BigAunty wrote: »

Does the FA belong to the IFA organisation and is there a complaints procedure?

Hello




Thanks, a good point.


I don't know unfortunately. At present, we aren't really sure if FA has abused trust, and don't want to upset Relative A as he's convinced he's a good friend.... Should look into this..

Hopalong1

Mr_Toad wrote: »

Get a solicitor to speak to A and explain the options, the FA does not need to be part of that or if A insists then make sure that both the FA and the solicitor are present.

Is there any hint that the FA has misappropriated any of A assets?

Hello Mr Toad


We have engaged a solicitor who is sending a third party unbiased representative to Relative A. This is to assess mental capacity, and although we have explained this to our relative, and he is in agreement, he wants to pass this to the FA.


He also wanted us there and we had to explain that in law, he must see the representative on his own, which he was a bit down about but agreed to.


Thank you for those links, we really don't know if there is any misappropriation as Relative A passes all his paperwork, including most of his own copies of statements to the FA. I told him he should really keep them himself, as he doesn't fully know what he has (neither do we apart from 2 of his latest statements). He keeps asking us to ask FA if he has enough money!


I will explore those links just in case, thank you.

BJV

I would get relative A to speak to his FA and give them authorization to get all copies of statements.

If there is anything to hide they will be loath to give you copies and this could be a good sign that there is something wrong. Nothing to hide nothing to fear etc.

P.s really hope your relative is feeling better.

roobee13

Hi Hopalong,

Anyone giving financial advice should be arrroved and regulated by the FCA. If you look up the FCA register, you can search by firm names (if he belongs to one) and by individual. This should show if he is regulated, and some of his advice history, i.e. previous firms etc.

I work in this industry so know a little about IFAs and their practices. Some clients do like their adviser to deal with all the paperwork but in my experience and opinion, the client should also have at least a copy of their statement. Like you say, its difficult to prove if they're not looking at his best interests but hopefully nothing is afoot.

Hope the solicitor can help furhter with this, appreciate it is a difficult situation, good luck.

Hopalong1

Skintmama wrote: »

What a difficult situation, as of course your relative is entitled to do as they wish with their money.

It sounds as if you are concerned that the FA is financially exploiting your relative though and may advise against the extra layer of protection you hope to put in place with POA. I wonder if there is any way in which you can check this person out?

Maybe you would find it helpful to discuss this with someone at AgeUk or Action on Elder Abuse?

I wish you luck and hope that the presence of a third party from the solicitor will help to make the process smoother.

These kinds of situations do seem to highlight the importance of establishing POA arrangements long before they are actually needed. Although sadly they too can be tools for abuse.

Hello Skintmama


Thank you. We hope that there hasn't been an abuse of trust, we simply don't know, apart from waiting for his statements in the post as he has given permission for us to open the post and pay his utility bills. I really hadn't wanted to touch his paperwork, as it's his private business, and he can do what he wants.


It was the SS who asked for financial statement and asked permission for us to look as he didn't know himself, which he agreed to, this is when we discovered his shares. It was also SS who said he really should have some in savings to access for his own care needs now and in the future. They were the ones who were concerned as we are not knowledgable about investments.


We will definitely explore the links and please, everyone with elderly relatives, do discuss POA for their futures, even if you feel reluctant to have the talk.

Hopalong1

z.n wrote: »

So long as your relative has capacity it is their decision whether to do a POA. However, it is clearly in his best interests to have a POA in place so if the IFA puts him off the idea (or heaven forbid suggests himself as attorney) that would indicate possible lack of capacity. At which point he would need a social worker to act on his behalf pending a court appointed attorney. Expensive and time consuming I would imagine.

So I suggest you take each step as it comes- no point worrying about possible problems- see if A will sign the POA first (and is confirmed to have capacity.) Once that is done then look at the investments and get independent advice about what is best. No point prodding the hornets nest until the POA is in place. One step at a time- or you will combust from stress.

Hello z-n




Thank you. This is what we have started with a solicitor. We had asked the FA to arrange talking with us and Relative A about POA as it was Relative A's wish to have FA involved, and heard nothing since, so we contacted a solicitor ourselves.


Like you say, we have been worrying sick, stressing out, but can only do things to help one step at a time, as we are running about like headless chickens getting quotes for works, discussing with relative, seeing to his needs and comforts, OH working full time and us not sleeping properly.