Would you go on holiday without your children

jjj1980

penguin83 wrote: »

I am going against the grain and saying that no I wouldn't personally go on holiday without my children (11, 9 and 1) particularly if they really didn't want to go to their grandparents.


The real issue though is her behaviour at that age is absolutely not on and whether on holiday or not is unacceptable.


Go with what feels right for you and your family. It will be the right decision. xx

Relieved I'm not the only!! Although I'm probably going against the grain anyway as I am of the opinion that any nights a child spends away from home should be at their request and only once old enough to be given a basic mobile to call home from.

Possibly tainted by my childhood of having grandparents/aunts refusing to call my mum if I woke upset asking for her and being told I had to let her have a bit of life without me.

lady1964

Yes we did when they were younger, they stayed with grandparents while we had a long weekend away, we managed 8 days once & although we missed our DD's, it was lovely to have a child free week.

I think it's important for parents to have time away together, kids need to understand that their parents aren't just parents, they are adults & need adult time together sometimes & if the parents have someone they trust & their kids like to spend time with, then it's win, win all round. It doesn't have to be much more than a long weekend if that's all that's manageable, but children also need to understand that the whole world doesn't revolve around them all the time.

OP, even if you just get a long weekend without your DD, it'll be good for you all, just go, relax & enjoy!

Mrs_Soup

We try and go for a long weekend for our anniversary each year- sadly that is in December so its usually cold but worth it anyway. So yes I would do it. The boys stay with my parents who live round the corner and look after them regularly anyway.

Who would look after your daughter though if you don't have anyone to look after her for an evening out what will you do for a week?

January20

alias*alibi wrote: »

Thanks for all your replies. Whilst sat on the beach watching DD learning to body board and making friends I had a pang of guilt about her being an only child. I'm sure she wouldn't be so stroppy if she had a sibling to play with but alas she doesn't. She can be quite selfish; this year we've had a mini break to Blackpool, she's been to alton towers, a day down in burnham on sea, bowling, cinema and TGI Fridays, days out walking the dog and kite flying plus Cornwall. She craves attention and ultimately looks to me and her dad for it.

If we had a holiday without her I'm sure DH's parents would have her but she hates staying there. 1. Because her nan goes to bed at 7pm and gets up at 2am (no joke). 2. Grandad takes her out but nan doesn't step outside the house. 3. They are confined to that area as neither grandparents drive so limited stuff to do. She already pulled her face when I mentioned it whining 'I hate staying there' and calling us bullies for even considering it. We at one point were just going to save up for 2 years and go to disney world the summer after her leaving juniors but not sure that I can wait that long! I just know me and DH desperately need a holiday together, on our own! We would have a short break again in the UK for all if us too.

I'm sorry to be blunt but your child's behaviour is not due to her being an only child, it's due to her being spoilt by you and your DH. Mine was an only child and she certainly wasn't such a little madam and wasn't selfish. Learn to say no, make her realise she is not the centre of the world, you will be doing her a big favour and your life will get easier!

annie_d

I think that as long as DD has a holiday with you too she really has no cause for complaint. Soon she will be going on school trips and you won't.

Spidernick

A holiday? We're lucky to get an evening without the kids!!!

I have to admit to being jealous of all the people on here who have grandparents willing to look after kids for a week or more at a time. As much as I'd like a holiday away from the kids every now and again, my parents wouldn't be willing to look after them (even though they live 120 miles away and only see the children a few times a year, but then there are three of them, so a bit of a handful) and my wife only has her dad now and he would be unable to do so either for health reasons.

To the OP: my kids are also a pain on holiday and show little appreciation of what we do for them. When I was growing up it was two weeks in Newquay every year without fail. We have taken ours all over the place (including a wonderful holiday to Japan this summer). They may well appreciate it all when they are grown up, but not now!

Becles

No I've never been away without them. I don't think I would feel comfortable leaving them even for a weekend, never mind a holiday!

I usually book holidays that have some sort of sports and games activities. They go off and play something and I get an hour or so to sit all by myself and read a book. That's bliss for a short time, but I couldn't do that for a whole holiday as I would miss them too much.

trolleyrun

When I was a child I got sent to my grandparents' farm for a month every summer. I've no idea what my (divorced) parents got up to but I loved every minute of it. Playing in the fields, cutting the grass for hay, crashing the tractor...

When I was 15, I was told to stay home on my own for a month. I don't know why I wasn't allowed to go to the farm, but I was left £40 for the month with instructions that "there's food in the freezer". They forgot the fact that I couldn't cook as I'd never been permitted to help in the kitchen. Luckily, my neighbours and friends took pity on me and fed me. My half-sister was allowed to come with on that holiday, which was quite baffling.

Having said that, I don't blame parents for wanting an adults only holiday. Just make sure you have someone responsible to look after your child. She might be "bored" with her nan and pa but who knows what'll happen when she's there for longer than a few hours? Perhaps she can get her nan into the garden, go for walks with pak learn something from their pasts etc. The possibilities are endless.

happycomper22

If I had someone willing to mind mine I would go for it! as long as I knew the child would be well looked after - whether the child threw a strop about it or not!!

mgdavid

maybe it's a generational thing but I simply don't understand the selfish attitude of parents today. We never even thought of finding a way to dump the children on someone else so we could have 'time together'. We were and are a family and we always did things together and still do when we can, this year we had a week by the sea with #1 son and partner and 2 grandchildren plus #2 son and fiancee who were over from Australia. Both sons are in their 30s!