Young, free and simply stupid; MrCF takes control!

MrCrimeFiction

Nothing new today or yesterday. I've been really lazy. Need to quickly tidy up before OH comes home though... Don't want to be in the bad books :rotfl:

No news on the financial front. I friend of mine got a letter today about a £800 tax refund. Why does it always happen to everyone else but me.

Been looking at cheap cars everyday. It will happen, i'm just not sure right now. Vans are pretty expensive so possible an older estate vehicle. The hope is that I can settle the outstanding finance and get another vehicle without taking out any more finance etc. I do think it can be done.

This will mean that after Loan 2 is paid off and with the finance gone, I will only have Loan 1 and 3 to worry about. Here my total debt would be way under 10k. We shall see.

Next couple of days should see the SO for the credit card being paid along with the monthly DD for Loan 3 and the over-payment to Loan 2. I also need to take out cash for mine and OH's joint Xmas pot. I think it's going to be a tight month but it is defo working taking the money out first.

Off to tidy up - Don't want to be the lazy man about the house.

MrCF

MrCrimeFiction

Nearly 3 weeks on and its been a bloody disaster....

I've been back on the gambling bandwagon. Pretty badly aswell.

It all came about when I spent what was left in the current account and raked up about £900 on the credit card. Then I needed money urgently so I applied for a 4k loan, which I magically got. So there I had 4 loans and a maxed out credit card.

Being half sensible, I paid off the credit card and paid off loans 2 and 3. This came to about £2500 so in theory I should have had about £1500 left? No. This was stupidly spent on gambling.

Ahhhh, I thought. Sell the car and pay off the finance. That will work. Ok so I sold the car for £3650 and paid off the finance (£3000) so it left me with £650.. Nope again that was spent on gambling.

I even went as far as putting another £750 on the credit card to fund my horrible habit.

I then woke the morning after the carnage and thought what the hell am I doing to my life.... I had a serious thought (again) and this is it.

Today I purchased an old banger of a car for £500 and this is the new run around. I have had to borrow out of the joint xmas pot until payday but I should get away with it.

We are away on holiday next week and I will just have enough money for the first few days until we get paid half way through our trip.

After this, I am going to pay £1000 into the joint account as both me and OH agreed we needed to pay in a bit more to cover the cost of a few things house related. Then I need to replace the money I took out of the joint xmas pot £350. From this I will transfer any additional money into my newly opened current account which is my non gambling account. In time I will transfer all my DD's and SO's over there and then cut up the card - not allowing me to spend my money. I will still keep the old account as that's where my wages get paid into.

From looking at my signature when I was last on here, my total debt was about £13,700.

At the moment it is as follows:

Loan 1 - £8400
Loan 4 - £4000
CC - £770

Total outstanding debt - £13,170

I'm delighted my total debt is a bit smaller, but I doubt ill get it below 10k by the end of the year which is what I wanted. I will get around to smashing the CC balance and then closing the account. I seem to remember someone telling me to close it as I didn't need it, gosh I should have listened.


On wards and upwards. I will beat this somehow

MrCF

[Deleted User]

Great minds and all that MrCF (not in the gambling sense of course, my gambling days are well behind me thank goodness) but in the fact that I was about to post on here to ask if you were alright as it's been ages since you last posted. You just beat me to it!

I'm sorry if I'm coming over as all self-righteous and holier than thou but I've been exactly where you've been and got several T-shirts to prove it:o. What's worse, I didn't realise at as early a stage as you're at that I just had to stop. We're not talking half-measures here, we're talking going cold turkey.

Please, MrCF, do it and stick to it, with professional/group help if necessary, but just do it. It's no use talking about stopping or making a token attempt to stop. If you have an addictive personality that will never be the end of it.

Thankfully, not too much damage has been done to your debt situation but you've ended up with an old banger (nothing wrong with that, I drive one myself;)) but you could have reliability issues and have to spend a whole mint of money keeping it roadworthy. May not be so cost-effective after all.

And is your girlfriend/wife fully in the picture? I assume you had to give her a reason for downgrading your car. If she isn't you really should find a good time for you both and put your cards on the table. All of them. You are going to need her total understanding and support if you are going to get yourself straight. A true relationship can't survive based on secrets and deception. Maybe she won't want to stay with you and I really hope that isn't the case as you sound a decent bloke who hasn't committed crimes or anything like that. You've just been weak but maybe she doesn't think that's the type of husband/partner she wants to spend her future with. As a gambler you're obviously willing to take a risk but are you willing to risk your relationship?

I agree with your plan to cut up your credit card but don't close every credit card account that you have. It may be that your credit rating takes a nosedive in the future and you won't be accepted for a card if you apply for a new one. I'm on a Debt Management Plan and am making every effort to pay off my debts in full as soon as I can. I take full responsibility for these debts, nobody made me spend the money, it's all down to me after all:o. I wouldn't have ever considered bankruptcy when things were at their worst as I feel honour-bound to pay my debts not have them written off. But being on a DMP means I am not allowed to use any of my 'old' credit cards, they have all been cancelled by the lenders. Neither could I get a new one as my credit worthiness is now judged to be rubbish. Living without any access to any credit whatsoever was a killer at first, you wouldn't want to do it. You can trust me on that.

Don't be so long between posts next time. Although we don't really know you we feel we do slightly from your diary and wish so much for you to succeed. Take care of yourself.

Westie983

keep your chin up MCF,

today is another day :-)

MrCrimeFiction

Well things haven't exactly gone to plan...

I was accepted for a 12k loan which was transferred into my account directly 2 weeks ago, a few days after my last update. Care to guess what......Yes. ....Not all of it though.

OH and I were aware for a few days and it actually got to me what I stand to loose if I don't stop what I am doing. I had a MASSIVE and PROPER LBM. This is it. I know this is it this time as the thought of loosing the stuff I have got makes me really low and ....

I have transferred all of my DD and SO into another current account I opened. I have shredded the PIN and cut up the card already. I can log in on the phone only to see the balance etc.

Now, loans, loans loans. I have loads.

Loan 1 - Balance - £8400 - £307 monthly
Loan 2 - Balance - £4000 - £190 monthly
Loan 3 - Balance - £12000 - £538 monthly

Although I have over £6500 in my invisible current account from my loan, this is staying there to pay for the HUGE debt monthly repayments I have accumulated. Between the loans, my car tax/insurance I am near £1100. The great news is that all my debt will now be paid off within 24 months. I no longer have a credit card as this was paid off and closed down.

Basically the news since my last update was that I gambled between £4-5k of the £12k I received from the loan. The rest £7-8k was used to pay off credit card and bump up the current account. I did also get about £300 in overtime on payday.

I'm back to reading and this is how I know my LBM is for real this time. I read 3 chapters and I couldn't put the book down. This is great for me. I feel like i'm me again.

Aims

* No gambling throughout September
* No deposits / transfers from invisible account throughout September
* Read 3 books throughout September

Leave a balance of £250 in my normal current account after payday. This is after I pay my half to the joint account and the remainder to my "invisible" account. If my wage is about £2k a month this should be about £1000 which is just under all the monthly repayments.

I have thought about repaying loan 2, but i'm trying to teach myself a lesson with money. There is no point clearing debt to take more out. I have about £24,000 of debt which I will get rid off in 24 months.

Further update later

MrCF

MrCrimeFiction

Looking back at the accounts, the last day I gambled was a week ago today so I'm 7 days in recovery. 7 days more than I thought I would last so feeling positive.

There is exactly £7k in the invisible account with between £300-£400 left in the current account for expenses. I won't use all of this but I need to arrange stuff for OH'S birthday soon. Xmas isn't far away as well.

Another few chapters read of the book and I'm feeling great. I was in the shed for hours today tidying up and I have noticed that if I keep busy, I never think about money or gambling at all. The new thing is to keep myself busy.

Have you all noticed that after my absence I post bad news. When I gamble I never come on here in fear of updating. Once again I will commit to posting everyday. Some days might be pointless but others might be interesting.

My only spend today was £19.50 in fuel. Shouldn't spend anything this week other than maybe a £10 over the course of the weekend.

Il explain my theory a bit more.

Loans 2 (£4000) and 3 (£12000) run over 24 months and loan 1 has 29 or 30 months remaining. All of the monthly payments will be taken from the invisible account with me contributing a significant sum of my wages to the account on each payday. The theory is that I will overpay loan 1 so much that it will end the same time as the other loans. So if everything works out I will be debt free in 24 months. Also, even if I can't afford to contribute the full debt monthly payments into the invisible account, there is £7k in there to cover payments and any significant unexpected expenses. I will not vw touching this account for anything else.

I am a man on a mission.

MrCF

Westie983

good luck with your challenge, can you block any gambling apps or websites to stop any impulse moments, and maybe something to stop you applying for more credit, as this leads to more gambling...??

Well done on coming back and facing your demons, hope the next 7 days also make you happy :-)

mothernerd

Yes, I noticed. The first time you went awol, I was worried that you were gambling. Then you went again. However you have dealt with the situation, you have a plan. you know what you have to do, what you stand to lose if you mess up and you have strategies to avoid gambling. We all want you to succeed and will help and support however we can. Daily posting is the way to go. Perhaps you can make a chart and colour in a square for each month you pay off - some people divide their debt into a hundred squares and get very involved in their charts.

MrCrimeFiction

Thanks everyone, it does mean so much to me.

Day 8 completed with no issues. Was in work today but got away an hour early due to my hard work. My boss is still obviously impressed with me.

When I went though that gambling period, I did feel myself being distracted from work and I noticed I was getting things wrong and sloppy. This can't happen again. I did apologize to my boss today saying my minds been elsewhere but he said he didn't notice. Thought it was best to be honest a bit.

No spends today which is great. Sitting down doing extra work stuff to try and get some budgets finished on time. Like I said I want to impress all the more.

Phoned up today to transfer across loan 3 to the invisible account as this was the only one left to do. They cant do it until the first payment has been taken out on 1st October. So I have to wait a month to transfer this over which is no issue.

The invisible account now has the following DD/SO's

Loan 1
Loan 2
Car insurance - Yes i'm ashamed I went for monthly repayments.
Car tax - Same again as above - totally ashamed.
Mobile Phone bill

The idea is that I don't need to look at it as I know there is enough money in there to cover all payments for over a year, hence i'm calling it my invisible account :rotfl:

Will sit down after dinner and read a few more chapters of the book, more than half way through it now and really enjoying it. I have the 2nd and 3rd book waiting for me when its finished so there is no rest.

Cancelled xbox live as I don't need it and I don't think I have any other payments at all. The bank should look healthy I hope.

I may do the chart thing with my total debt. The only thing is that it may remind me and I will start accessing the account, which is something I don't want to do. I only want to be putting money in that account, never transferring it out.

Away to get a new signature..

MrCF

Westie983

^^oooozing positivity here MCF,

just thought I would share me thoughts go you....