I am such an idiot! When will I learn?

judi24

I did find a couple and have been using them and blankets - its that bit when my mum is in the house to look after the kids and they come in cold and wet - I have switched it off again now - I think we had a cold snap I wan't prepared for!


I have a question for all you YNAB gurus - I have finaly read all the daily e-mails they send whe you sign up for the free trial and it talks about getting ahead and working on last months pay - I get the theory but should I really be trying to do that while I have debt? or should I continue with trying to pay down the debt as quickly as possible?


I guess I am not really budgeting well at the moment - I have no emergency fund and not putting anything away for one off bills - just working out what I need for the month and throwing the rest at the debt - do I seriously need to rethink my approach?

joedenise

I think it's important to have an Emergency Fund otherwise you just end up having to use a credit card again if an "emergency" crops up; be that a bigger bill than expected, the car needs a new tyre etc.

I think it will take some time to be able to work to last month's pay. I've been using YNAB for about 3 months and I'm nowhere near getting a full month's money into the Buffer - I'm definitely still working with this month's money at the moment.

Denise

judi24

Well had a fun weekend with DD1 and DD2 - not too bad money wise - we went out for a drink then had takeaway so total cost was £31 - not too bad really - my Dad took us for a lovely Sunday dinner today which was great and din't cost me a penny! Not needed to eat for the rest of the day either!


I need to do a menu plan and shopping list and try to keep shopping to under £30 but should be possible if I'm careful - not much else to report MSE wise! Hope everyone has had a good weekend

Busy_Mee

Hi Judi - glad you had such a nice weekend. We haven't done too much- lots of jobs but the weather has been quite nice. I have got my slow cooker back out and have made a giant coc au vin which will hopefully last for a couple of days. I am away Tuesday to Thursday and I like to leave them something healthy otherwise my OH resorts to brown tea - pie and chips, burger and chips....you get the picture.
Also uploaded 8 items onto fleabay. I have been meaning to do this for ages and haven't got round to it. Anyway done it now and already have bids on two items. It is a bit of effort - particularly the parcelling up and posting but it is a good way of making extra cash out of stuff that in the past I would have just given away. It has also highlighted to me how much stuff I have bought in the past that I have hardly worn..either because it didn't really fit or because it was cheap in a sale. It has made me a lot more mindful about what I buy. I now don't buy anything that I don't love or can't wear immediately...no more buying bargains to diet in to !

judi24

Busy Me you sound so like me! When I go away with work I have an itinery for my mum with meals prepared etc so she doesnt resort to brown tea each night! DD3's fall back meal is pastansauce which she would eat every night if she could get away with it - try to explain to my mum and her that it is fine occasionally but has the nutritional value of cardboard! (a bit like pot noodle which is my DS's fall back favorite!)


I so need to ebay - like you I have bought things thinking it will look better when I lose some weight only to still hate it! Next weekend might be an Ebay weekend as I have no money so will not be going far (got loads of jobs to do after being away this weekend) and to be honest after DD3 and DS have been at thier dads for 2 weekends they both love to just chill - DS with his x-box and dd3 watching american c**p tv - so I can get on and do things now I have a few weeks break from assignments.


Just need this rotten cold to go away though! DD2 started with it last week and I have been full of it all weekend and now it feels like it is going to my chest - I could really do without feeling ill and can't take any days off work after only being there 2 weeks!

Busy_Mee

Sorry to hear about your cold - there seems to be a lot of nasty germs flying around at the moment and I am sure like me you think you just haven't got time to be ill. The reality is that no one would probably bat an eyelid if you had a day at home, probably be quite relieved that you are not sharing your lurgy !
It took me a while to pluck up courage to do fleabay - I spent quite a while sussing out what prices to set, what postage to charge and when to finish the auctions (Sunday evening seems to work best) I then have to make sure I can get to a post office on a Monday...I also bought a load of polythene postage bags for a fiver off Amazon. Has been worth it though made about £300 so far

judi24

The ironic thing is I have worked in the NHS for years with good sick pay and hardly had any time off! Moved to a non NHS organisation 2 weeks ago and only get SSP for the first 6 months!!! Also really doesnt look good to be off but equally shouldn't be spreading my germs I agree - even more ironic is that I have an occupational health appt for pre-employment checks tomorrow! so will be coughing and spluttering through that! I think I might go to chemist before work and get some super strength cold and flu things and try to blag being a healthy specimin!!!


Fantastic fleabay amount Busy Me- I need to get my act together and have a go!

Bobarella

Hi judi
read your whole thread last night. Just to say you sound like you are doing so well. I can only imagine how hard it is to try & get out of long standing habits of spoiling your kids I really sympathise. But you sound like you are now on the right road with it all. Good luck will keep reading.
Bob

judi24

Thanks Bob - It is hard to not want to spoil the kids! I guess I have spent so long trying to be mum and dad to them and prove they don't need thier waste of space dads - My driver in my career has been so I can give them a good home and a good life and that seems to go hand in hand with 'things!' (often on credit cards) but I think I am getting there! (all CC's cut up now!)


Christmas is a real challenge for me and I know the temptation is there to spend on things they don't need - but I am trying!!! This board is great for giving me a sense check. I am fine with presents for others - my bramble brandy and eldersflower vodka is brewing nicely and combined with some home made tablet and shortbread that should be fine! (thanks to Ampersands motivation and inspiration!)


Anyway - NSD today - been through the freezer and fridge and think I can make it through til Friday without shopping then will have £30 to do me til next Friday - I also have £15 in my purse so won't need to lift any cash. One of my biggest issues (after spoiling kids!) is food shopping and nipping into the local shop cos i not organised or feeling too tired to cook from scratch. today I made sausage casserole in slow cooker for DD2 and DD3 (DS at his dads and I had rice, veg and quorn as trying to loose weight) but DD2 refused to eat it so now got leftovers for DD3 later in the week - also made home made fish cakes for tomorrow and turned a bar of chocolate and a few toffees into chocolate chip and toffee cookies as treats for the week! Quite productive especially as I am full of cold and wanted to go to bed at 6pm!


Anyway - 11 days til payday!!!! Onwards and upwards!

Bobarella

Hi Judi
It's interesting, in the single parent families I know often either the person not living in the family home seems to feel the need to go insane on the present front, or the at home parent feels the need to buy lots to over compensate. I think the link between families living apart and debt must be a strong one.
But at the end of the day spending time with your children is all that matters really. You sound a great mum.
I'm on the waiting train as well 9 days till that blessed pay cheque. We have had an OD the last couple of months due to my income being variable to say the least. Hoping this will be the one we get through!
Good luck
Bob