I am such an idiot! When will I learn?

judi24

I am not sure how many times I have to come back hear with my situation never improving!!! Who am I kidding??


I have been on and off this site for years (8 i think!) and still not managed to control my spending!


I split from my ex husband and met someone else 7 years ago but split from him a year ago in January and since then I guess i have been hugely un focussed on anything let alone debt! This summer in an attempt to prove to myself that I could do anything I wanted with or without a partner I decided to take my 2 younger kids away on holiday - so booked a 'cheap' deal and put it on my CC on top of that I spent money on buying 'stuff' to go away with and also paid for outfits meals and a party for my eldest daughters graduation as if I was a 2 parent family! I then helped her set up in her new home as she doesnt get paid until the end of the month so needed to live for a month on very little except my handouts!


I know why I did it - I wanted to show the world that although I am rubbish in relationships I am successful and a good mum - stupid I know! we did have a good holiday and my daughter had a great graduation and has survived the month - however while on holiday had some serious thinking time and have now got a long term plan on my own - which i was lacking and was just drifting with no focus - the problem is I now have to really get a grip of my finances!!!


I am posting my SOA again! and I am now working on a plan to priorotise my debt payment - however I have few bills this month that I put off last month so will have very little reserve to overpay debt - but I need to stick to a very tight budget for food shopping and going to have to focus even though I am not really moving forward!


Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet
Household Information
Number of adults in household........... 2 (me and a my 21 yr old daughter)
Number of children in household......... 2
Number of cars owned.................... 1


Monthly Income Details
Monthly income after tax................ 2900
Partners monthly income after tax....... 0
Benefits................................ 134
Other income............................ 100 (daughters keep)
Total monthly income.................... 3134


Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 817
Secured/HP loan repayments.............. 0
Rent.................................... 0
Management charge (leasehold property).. 0
Council tax............................. 100
Electricity............................. 100
Gas..................................... 88
Oil..................................... 0
Water rates............................. 65
Telephone (land line)................... 15
Mobile phone............................ 60 (my contract is 30 but i stupidly took an I pad contract last Jan for 24 months - will be cancelled in Jan)
TV Licence.............................. 12
Satellite/Cable TV...................... 35
Internet Services....................... 10
Groceries etc. ......................... 300
Clothing................................ 50 (this is kids stuff I need to not buy anything for a while)
Petrol/diesel........................... 60
Road tax................................ 0 (i have an eco car)
Car Insurance........................... 20
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 10
Car parking............................. 0
Other travel............................ 0
Childcare/nursery....................... 0
Other child related expenses............ 0
Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 0
Pet insurance/vet bills................. 15
Buildings insurance..................... 0 (included in below)
Contents insurance...................... 15
Life assurance ......................... 15
Other insurance......................... 0
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 150
Haircuts................................ 20
Entertainment........................... 100
Holiday................................. 0
Emergency fund.......................... 0
Total monthly expenses.................. 2057


Assets
Cash.................................... 0
House value (Gross)..................... 240000
Shares and bonds........................ 0
Car(s).................................. 3500
Other assets............................ 0
Total Assets............................ 243500


Secured & HP Debts

Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Mortgage...................... 152000...(817)......2.5%
Total secured & HP debts...... 152000....-.........-


Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
loan...........................5669......245.......10.1 (finishes June 2016)
tesco cc.......................4824......85........0
barclaycard....................5836......145.......0
First direct OD................415.......0.........0
smile OD.......................365.......0.........0
nationwide OD .................1142......0.........0
nationwide cc..................1200......35........0
Total unsecured debts..........19451.....510.......

Monthly Budget Summary
Total monthly income.................... 3,134
Expenses (including HP & secured debts). 2,057
Available for debt repayments........... 1,077
Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 510
Amount left after debt repayments....... 567


Personal Balance Sheet Summary
Total assets (things you own)........... 243,500
Total HP & Secured debt................. -152,000
Total Unsecured debt.................... -19,451
Net Assets.............................. 72,049


Created using the SOA calculator at www.stoozing.com.
Reproduced on Moneysavingexpert with permission, using other browser


I will go and look for the APRs on the Credit cards - about 2 months ago I tried to get a 0% card to shift balances around but couldn't as i stupidly missed a couple of payments on a store card and have got myself a poor credit rating - I also tried unsuccessfully to remortgage and consolidate - I am glad now as i know its definately not the best way to pay unsecured debt - however I just thought it might help me regain some control!


Anyway I need to start a spending diary as I have no where near £567 a month left to pay off debt!!! and I need a plan and some motivation!


I feel such an idiot to be doing this again!!!!

judi24

ok got more details about my intrest rates:
tesco cc.......................4824......85........16.9%
barclaycard....................5836......145...... 16.9%
nationwide cc..................1200......35........12.9%


Barclaycard and Nationwide are currently on 0% but both end in September - barclaycard are ofereing a 0% transfer to Aug 2015 but will only let me transfer £1000


Nationwide has a credit limit of £7500 and I am am oly using £1200 of it but apparantly my account setting were not allowing any offer to ba made - they have changed the sttings and suggested i ring back i na few weeks to see if they can offer any promotional rates. I also have an unused MBNA card - it is an old account that I had reactivated in the hope that they would offer me a balance transfer deal - but they havent and I am not sure how or if there is any way of influencing this.


I am tempted to try to clear the various OD's and only pay minimum on CC's and for a few months but I am not sure if that is the best plan - it might make me feel a little more in control though and hope that over the next month i get a balance transfer on either the MBNA or Nationwide card

Meatloaf1981

judi24 wrote: »

Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet
Household Information
Number of adults in household........... 2 (me and a my 21 yr old daughter)
Number of children in household......... 2
Number of cars owned.................... 1


Monthly Income Details
Monthly income after tax................ 2900
Partners monthly income after tax....... 0
Benefits................................ 134
Other income............................ 100 (daughters keep) Any chance your daughter can increase this? £100 is remarkably low in this day and age. Depends on her income, mind.
Total monthly income.................... 3134


Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 817
Secured/HP loan repayments.............. 0
Rent.................................... 0
Management charge (leasehold property).. 0
Council tax............................. 100
Electricity............................. 100
Gas..................................... 88
Oil..................................... 0
Water rates............................. 65
Telephone (land line)................... 15
Mobile phone............................ 60 (my contract is 30 but i stupidly took an I pad contract last Jan for 24 months - will be cancelled in Jan)
TV Licence.............................. 12
Satellite/Cable TV...................... 35 Do away with Satellite, seriously. Absolutely nothing worth having when you have bills like yours.
Internet Services....................... 10
Groceries etc. ......................... 300
Clothing................................ 50 (this is kids stuff I need to not buy anything for a while)
Petrol/diesel........................... 60
Road tax................................ 0 (i have an eco car)
Car Insurance........................... 20
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 10
Car parking............................. 0
Other travel............................ 0
Childcare/nursery....................... 0
Other child related expenses............ 0
Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 0
Pet insurance/vet bills................. 15
Buildings insurance..................... 0 (included in below)
Contents insurance...................... 15
Life assurance ......................... 15
Other insurance......................... 0
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 150 This seems very high. £150 a month? Cut back to the bone on this. Surely your own kids don't have birthdays every month that require this?
Haircuts................................ 20
Entertainment........................... 100 This could also be cut right down. Appreciate mostly spent on kids but start taking them for days out doing free things. Walks, the park, cycling, swimming etc.
Holiday................................. 0
Emergency fund.......................... 0 You need something in here, you'll want to save up a least a couple of months mortgage payments to be on the safe side.
Total monthly expenses.................. 2057


Assets
Cash.................................... 0
House value (Gross)..................... 240000
Shares and bonds........................ 0
Car(s).................................. 3500
Other assets............................ 0
Total Assets............................ 243500


Secured & HP Debts

Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Mortgage...................... 152000...(817)......2.5%
Total secured & HP debts...... 152000....-.........-


Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
loan...........................5669......245.......10.1 (finishes June 2016)
tesco cc.......................4824......85........0
barclaycard....................5836......145.......0
First direct OD................415.......0.........0
smile OD.......................365.......0.........0
nationwide OD .................1142......0.........0
nationwide cc..................1200......35........0
Total unsecured debts..........19451.....510.......

Monthly Budget Summary
Total monthly income.................... 3,134
Expenses (including HP & secured debts). 2,057
Available for debt repayments........... 1,077
Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 510
Amount left after debt repayments....... 567


Personal Balance Sheet Summary
Total assets (things you own)........... 243,500
Total HP & Secured debt................. -152,000
Total Unsecured debt.................... -19,451
Net Assets.............................. 72,049

Don't be hard on yourself. I've put a couple of things in red that appear most obvious to me. Your balance sheet, on the face of it, is rather healthy actually, and certainly not something you should be struggling with. The remaining cash you have after all payments would clear a lot of the smaller debts very quickly indeed, then focus on the higher rate APR credit cards before worrying too much about the lower raite APR ones which you should pay minimum on for now.

[Deleted User]

You have £567 left each month, yet you have overdrafts :huh:

I suggest you put the spare money (or at least a chunk of it) toward clearing the ODs.

At £567 per month, you could have them cleared in less than a year.

Once the ODs are cleared, put all spare cash toward the highest APR debt, which appears to be either the Tesco CC or the Barclaycard.

BTW. I agree with Meatloaf1981, that your daughter's contribution is low.

It only just covers the CT.

Also, as advised by Meatloaf1981, dump the Pay TV,and reduce the presents money, which is currently an eye watering £1,800 per year. :eek:

I'd say reduce the presents fund to £50pm, and halve entertainment spending.

Excluding an increase in your daughter's contribution, the above reductions will save you £185pm, which is £2,220pa, which would almost cover your energy costs.

Meatloaf1981

As Bob stated, I would go with all of that and really push yourself to get better deals on your energy bills and utility bills. I have had a great time using Utility Warehouse to switch my mobile phone and home phone/broadband to them:

Mobile phone is now £12.50pcm and includes 500MB data, unlimited texts and 200 minutes calls

Home phone is now £14.90pcm for line rental, no cost to the call package with free evening and weekend calls.

Broadband is free for 6 months, then £6.99pcm afterwards.

They gave me £200 towards my mobile phone contract to buy me out of the remainder of my O2 contract. I am looking to switch my energy provider to them later this year if the deal is better than I pay now.

Best of all, there is no 12 month contract or anything like that to tie you in. If you find a better deal elsewhere, they will try and match it or let you go!

Whomever you switch to, it makes sense to make that switch because it will save you £££'s.

judi24

Thanks for your comments Meatloaf


I agree my Daughters keep seems low - she earns about £900 a month and I guess i could ask for more but she also helps me with childcare for my youngest who is still at primary school on her dasy off - this saves me money in childcare costs 2 days a week - and she also babysits sometimes for me to go out. I had thought of showing her the household costs and suggesting she pays a quarter minus the amount i would pay for chilcare but not sure it would be much different.


In relation to satelite TV i have just reduced the package todayand I used to pay for a second box in the family room so one step at a time. Kids were surprised I did it as I had been threatening it for a while!


The £150 for presents is birthdays and Christams for 4 kids - and this is actually quite a reduction in what I have been spending in the past - this might be one of my issues! I tend to spend too much at these times -I have told the kids that this year they will get less - and to be honest they were fine about it. My problem is that I don't actually save this amount each month - I have just spent on CC's at Christmas - I am going to try to put this amount aside each month so I actually have cash to spend which might also make it feel like real money I'm handing over in the shops.


I will set a realistic budget for christmas and put this away over the next 4 months and only spand that this year. As for birthdays - I usually spend around £100 on a present and then go out for a family meal and even somewhere cheap ends up costing around £80 for the 6 of us (always take my mum)


I definately will try to cut back on expensive entertainment but again even a cinema trip costs a fortune these days!


I also totally agree I should have an emergency fund - at the moment emergencies just add to my debt!!!


I know it is achievable to sort this out - I guess I have just lost the motivation recently - but while on holiday I have had the time to think about what I want from life and re evaluate my plans on my own - and I feel much more positive.


My 2 year goal is to have no debt (except mortgage) and have money saved for a holiday for us as a family rather than putting it on credit.


My 10 year goal is to get mortgage free and relocate to France ( my ex an I were planning this and there is absolutely no reason why I can't do this on my own! I am the only one holding me back! )

judi24

Bedsit_Bob wrote: »

You have £567 left each month, yet you have overdrafts :huh:

I suggest you put the spare money (or at least a chunk of it) toward clearing the ODs.

At £567 per month, you could have them cleared in less than a year.

Once the ODs are cleared, put all spare cash toward the highest APR debt, which appears to be either the Tesco CC or the Barclaycard.

BTW. I agree with Meatloaf1981, that your daughter's contribution is low.

It only just covers the CT.

Also, as advised by Meatloaf1981, dump the Pay TV,and reduce the presents money, which is currently an eye watering £1,800 per year. :eek:

I'd say reduce the presents fund to £50pm, and halve entertainment spending.

Excluding an increase in your daughter's contribution, the above reductions will save you £185pm, which is £2,220pa, which would almost cover your energy costs.

When you put the figures together over the year it really opens your eyes to how much is being wasted!!!! The real problem is i don't have £567 left - i spend it and more on nothing in particular!!! I guess recently it has been to treat kids after what has been a pretty tough time - and also make myself feel better (girlie night outs and meals out etc) - and it doesn't!!! I know that!

[Deleted User]

judi24 wrote: »

The £150 for presents is birthdays and Christmas for 4 kids

So each child gets around £400 of presents each year? :eek:

You really can't afford to be spending that much.

As for your daughter's contribution, given how much she earns, I'd say you need to at least double it, or maybe even triple it.

Meatloaf1981

Ok well in answer to some of your points. You could start with doubling your daughters contribution. £200 a month is so cheap for a 21 year old. She's welcome to leave if she doesn't want to pay it, as she'll soon find renting a room for £400 plus bills will put things in perspective!

Planning your shopping and doing it once a week, taking full advantage of discount offers and loss leaders is an absolute must. The "brand swap" is a great idea and being firm with the kids about things is where you may need to bend a few noses in their joints. The kids need to realise they are not "entitled" to eat whatever they want, brand-wise and if they have a specific favourite then they can buy it themselves with their own money.

The birthday presents and Christmas budget should be halved. Easily halved. You can get nice, thoughtful presents without spending ridiculous sums. Kids want the latest gadgets, but that doesn't mean you have to get them! If they want one, offer to help them save up for one or else they will never understand the value of money. Rule of thumb for me, when it comes to kids is not to spend more than £30 on their birthday and no more than £50 at Christmas. It can be done, and they won't love you any less for spending less if you put genuine thought into it.

You can entertain the kids without taking them expensive places. Believe me, it can be done!

judi24

I used to be really good at menu planning and i guess it just takes time and effort - kids are not really fussy (except for my 21 year old) so will eat whatever I cook and they prefer proper meals than convenience stuff - I just need to be more organised again!


As for my daughters contibution - I know you are right and she is getting away with paying very little - I have said I would sell house and down size and she is not happy with me doing that - so I will ask her to pay more!


The kids don't really expect lots but I guess they have always been used to it so its changing their mindset as well as mine!!! (mine is probably harder to change!) I guess it is about re-educating myself!


I have been reading a book while I was away 'the savvy womans guide to financial freedom' and I think it has really helped me focus on what i really want to do with my money - which is NOT to service debt for the rest of my life!!!

in_need_of_direction

Like you I find it really hard to cut back on presents. If you are going to spend, make sure you use top cash back, quidco or just google for promo codes to reduce the cost. It really does add up. Also, given I've two older children, I save my boots points, nectar points etc and use these towards Christmas.