Baby next door crying non-stop!

Reams

lulu_92 wrote: »

Don't worry I am seriously considering my options. It is hard to think rationally when all you want to do is go round and tell them to be quiet! That's not something I would do as it is incredibly insensitive and rude.

When I ran to where I thought my neighbour had hit her child, I was carrying a basting spoon in my hand.


Tell that to the Judge.

Georgiegirl256

lulu_92 wrote: »

Of course, because all I have done in this thread is talk about how much I don't care about the mum or the family in this situation and it's all about me.

I haven't gone round because I don't want to add further stress to her life and I don't want to be rude or disrespectful to her.

I am totally aware that she could be having a hard time - but it is equally hard to hear her screaming and swearing at both of her kids throughout the day. I've never heard her say anything as bad as what I heard today which is why it threw me off guard.

Of course I will think about myself to an extent in this situation. I have been ill for the past 2-3 months with no idea of the cause. I have to spend a lot of my time at home because I am simply too tired to go out and do anything. I'm not expecting any sympathy for this, I am merely saying that 1) the noise from next door doesn't really help and 2) I've been noticing it more than my OH because I'm in the house for more hours of the day than he is (I work 9-5 and he works 12-10)

Like Reams and savingmummy said, I have to be careful what I do because of the consequences it could cause to the family and also to my home life. Of course I don't want to do anything that could create problems between us.

I've told OH that I want the house on the market by January, just so I can see a light at the end of this horrible tunnel.

What I'm saying is though, if you were seriously worried about the welfare of the baby and the older child then you would do something about it. At least you'd hope so. Because how on earth would you feel if the mother was mistreating the children and god forbid something happened to one or both of them?

I know if that was me, and I had serious grounds for concern, then I wouldn't hesitate to report them. I couldn't live with myself if something happened and I could have done something to stop it.

This thread started off as you being annoyed at the constant screaming and crying, but gradually more and more info has been drip fed to us, so we're now at the point where the mother is screaming awful things at the child.

That's why I said you were more concerned about yourself and having to live with the noise, because if you did have serious concerns, then surely you would do something about it?

savingmummy

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

What I'm saying is though, if you were seriously worried about the welfare of the baby and the older child then you would do something about it. At least you'd hope so. Because how on earth would you feel if the mother was mistreating the children and god forbid something happened to one or both of them?

I know if that was me, and I had serious grounds for concern, then I wouldn't hesitate to report them. I couldn't live with myself if something happened and I could have done something to stop it.

This thread started off as you being annoyed at the constant screaming and crying, but gradually more and more info has been drip fed to us, so we're now at the point where the mother is screaming awful things at the child.

That's why I said you were more concerned about yourself and having to live with the noise, because if you did have serious concerns, then surely you would do something about it?

Agree.
A crying baby I`d put up with, but if I was concerned and upset about the goings on drip fed to us I`d be reporting it.

Reams

savingmummy wrote: »

Agree.
A crying baby I`d put up with, but if I was concerned and upset about the goings on drip fed to us I`d be reporting it.

Do it then.

Torry_Quine

I think this is a really difficult situation for everyone concerned, not least lulu 92 who has had some harsh things said to her.

I can't imagine how hard it must be having to listen to this night after night and also wondering if there is more to it.

I realise that for the parents it will most likely be intolerable too and they need help but what can a young neighbour who doesn't really know them do?

notanewuser

Send her mum round?

FBaby

Lulu in regards to your question about things aid to babies in desperation, yes I did horrible things, shouted and even often cried with them(which used to get then to stop for about 20 seconds! ). I even thought of ringing social services to bed then to take them away. Of course all this makes you feel even more hopeless. Thankfully I never felt the urge to hurt them.

FBaby

My health visitors were both useless and had shockingly less knowledge of colic then I. The second one used to take her pad out to write the things I'd tried 'add it could help others'.

OP just to say that when you are feeling utterly frustrated getting the most horrible words out can help. It doesn't mean that you mean them it just allows you to get some steam out. Often followed by bursting into tears with a 'I'm so sorry my baby you have such a useless mother'.

hawk30

Mylo_The_Moggy wrote: »

And then there are ppl like me & hubby who would do anything to have a crying baby after 10 years of trying with no success!
Not having a go OP, but once you start trying for a baby of your own & it doesn't happen, it may change your views in life. It certainly has me.

Yes babies cry & scream, some more so than others, but there's very little you can do about it these days without putting someone's nose out of joint or rubbing them up the wrong way. Particularly if the parents are stressed through lack of sleep etc.

You seem a nice person & am sure you wouldn't wanna upset your neighbours in any way. If the mother swears & shouts in front of the children, then she may react the same if you confronted her.

It really is a difficult situation to be in. However, as said before, babies do tend to cry alot in the first few months. I would run to the ends of the earth just to be able to have a baby crying in my arms.

I understand your situation. Believe me I do. But as one of the lucky people who managed to get their baby in the end, let me say that the reality of a crying baby is very different to an imagined one. After a couple of weeks of non-stop crying where I had barely slept or moved from the sofa, I remember asking my husband (in tears) if we should give LO to someone who could look after her better. The baby that I had longed for for years. For us it got better quite quickly, but it must be awful for it to continue for months. So I have sympathy for both the mum and the OP having to listen to it.

lostinrates

hawk30 wrote: »

I understand your situation. Believe me I do. But as one of the lucky people who managed to get their baby in the end, let me say that the reality of a crying baby is very different to an imagined one. After a couple of weeks of non-stop crying where I had barely slept or moved from the sofa, I remember asking my husband (in tears) if we should give LO to someone who could look after her better. The baby that I had longed for for years. For us it got better quite quickly, but it must be awful for it to continue for months. So I have sympathy for both the mum and the OP having to listen to it.

Thank you for typing this.

I am also infertile an would love a baby, but empathise with op tremendously. ( as well as the mothers of crying babies).

My infertility does not make someone else's situation such that they should put up and shut up. Hopefully count their blessings, but not put up and shut up, no.