Baby next door crying non-stop!

Luella-14_2

OP, I know you've said the neighbours aren't friendly but if you can find a way to get past that then giving them a white noise machine could be hugely beneficial to both parties. You can pick them up for £20, pretend your new mother friend / sister had a duplicate and you thought the neighbours' baby might like it. I have 5 month old twins and when we discovered white noise it was almost miraculous. You can get free apps on phones but I don't know how you could approach that.

I understand it must be tiring for you, but realistically there's not much the parents can do. I think I would be trying to help rather than complaining.

FBaby

My two children suffered from horrendous colic (for different as we later found out). In my DD's case, it went on until she was 14 months, not as much in the day, but each single night, she could cry for hours when I had to comfort her. Like it's been said here, when you found yourself in this situation and the medical field tells you that there is nothing wrong with your baby, you find yourself in such an ultimate mess that your life becomes trying absolutely everything in your power to end it.

Unfortunately, against all recommendations that second babies are always easier, my DS also suffered from horrendous colic that went on until he was 5 months old. Between the age of 4 and 6 weeks, he cried non-stop each and every single time he was awake. I couldn't take him out as I couldn't face people trying to give me advice (the nice ones) or the critics (from the nasty ones).

I know you've said the neighbours aren't friendly but if you can find a way to get past that then giving them a white noise machine could be hugely beneficial to both parties. You can pick them up for £20, pretend your new mother friend / sister had a duplicate and you thought the neighbours' baby might like it.

Please don't do that. If my neighbours had knocked on my door to give me such a box, I am not sure I wouldn't have thrown it back at their heads...because of course I had tried these and it had made no difference at all. I had tried absolutely everything available, different milks, every different bottles and tits on the market, homeopathy, osteopathy, every medication available on the counter, every gadget.

If my neighbour had knocked on my door explaining how the noise disturbed them, I am pretty certain I would have started to apologies, then burst into tears, continuing to say I was sorry, that I wished more than anything that I could stop it, but couldn't, and that all I could do was say sorry (and try to take the baby in a room furthest away from their bedroom).

Luella-14_2

FBaby wrote: »

Please don't do that. If my neighbours had knocked on my door to give me such a box, I am not sure I wouldn't have thrown it back at their heads...because of course I had tried these and it had made no difference at all. I had tried absolutely everything available, different milks, every different bottles and tits on the market, homeopathy, osteopathy, every medication available on the counter, every gadget.

But you don't know that the parents in question have tried these things. I hadn't heard of white noise until a friend suggested it when mine were 2months and I'm very grateful to her. If it's dressed up as a gift for the baby then it can't be refused and may give both the parents and the neighbours some quiet time.

FBaby

Then, I would suggest knocking on the door, introducing themselves properly, say that they hear their baby crying a lot and hope they are ok, that yes, it does disturb them quite a bit and is there anything they could do to help in anyway.

You would hope they would then apologise, and that if they THEN say that they don't know what to do, OP could suggest, very kindly, whether she has heard about white noise as she has heard that this can really help baby.

Sending it as a gift is a very hypocritical way of saying 'I really don't care much about you and your baby, but the noise is driving us insane, so here is something to make OUR life hopefully better'. I personally would have thrown it in their bin in display if my neighbour had knocked on the door and handed this 'gift'. For one, I could have paid for it myself if I had thought it could have helped (and not done so already) and for two, if they care so much about giving a present, they could have done so when the baby was born rather than when it started to disturb them.

catkins

QuackQuackOops wrote: »

Of course you are.
This baby cries so loudly you can't hold a conversation in your own home with someone?

Rubbish.

She may well mean that she can't think straight in order to hold a conversation.


I have quite a low tolerance to noise which has got worse as I have got older and find that if there is a continual noise I feel like I can't "think straight".

lulu_92 wrote: »

Yeah that's what I said. No laughing when a baby is crying. There's plenty of "what if they're doing this to help?" But what if they're not? What if they're generally not helping her when she cries? I'm not making an accusation but it might not be completely okay over there.

Lulu, if you think even for 1 second there may be something wrong then you should contact SS. All the stories in the papers about children being abused, illtreated and even killed and I always think someone must have had suspicions so why didn't they contact anyone?


The chances are everything is fine but what if they are not and something happened to the child, would you be able to forgive yourself? I know I wouldn't.


I have reported a couple of people in the past even when I knew one of the reportings would mean I had nowhere to live.
Many years ago I lived with my then boyfriend in the top part of a family's house. They had 5 children and were illtreating them. I reported them and although they could not know for sure it was me, they threw me and my boyfriend out.

GwylimT

notanewuser wrote: »

Worked in our home recording studio. When my parents bought their house all of the heavy flocked wallpaper (which had been up for years) had been put up with blu tack!

Why would you be putting stuff on kitchen units? People don't tend to keep babies in kitchens all evening..........

Good old flock wall paper, I remember my gran had it and you had to dust it almost every day, horrible stuff I couldn't stand the feeling of it.

In what way is it unusual for a baby to be in the living area of their parents home?

Peter333

thorsoak wrote: »

Do you realise that I am referring to circumstances that are 40 years old - and that I am still affected by how I felt by those circumstances? No 3 son is now grown up, married with children of his own - but a thread like this stills brings to the surface the feelings of impotence that I felt all those years ago, and once again, I am near to tears at the thought of it all.

Do you honestly think that in 40 years time, you are going to feel the same way as you feel now?

Please, please, please, lulu - have some compassion.

Mojisola wrote: »

Honestly, if discussing the subject is having that effect on you after all this time, you should get some help to let go of the emotions. It can't be good for you to be still carrying that around.

I agree. I must say, I have read a lot of this thread, and find many of Thorsoak's posts out of order. (Especially on page 9.) I don't understand why someone would come onto a thread that supposedly upsets them and makes them think about things that happened 40 years ago.

If the subject matter upsets you, then stay off the the thread. Don't come onto it repeatedly, having a go at everyone who says something you don't like, and making it all about you.

Yes of course people cannot always help having a baby that cries; and in some cases, it can be difficult to find out what's wrong. And I have had three myself so I do know, and can't be accused of being a stupid little childless person who is clueless! But you do have to remember that it's infuriating too, for the people next door.

We always kept our youngest in the room furthest away from next door when she was little and we were in a semi, and the neighbours never complained. All they said - when we asked them if they heard any baby crying - was they heard them occasionally in the bathroom (which was on the party wall.) But it was rare and it never bothered them.

So to the OP, you have my sympathy and I hope you get this sorted. Somehow.

meer53

OP, this is not going to go on forever. I don't know of any baby that doesn't stop crying eventually.

I have chronic tinnitus in both ears. It never goes away, i have learned to live with it as i have no choice. I didn't choose to have it, it just happened. There is no cure for it. Sometimes you just have to get over stuff.

mummyroysof3

We have 3 children so our neighbours have prob put up with a lot if noise from us especially as youngest who is 5 has a disability and is noisey all the time when awake and gets up stupid early and sometimes in night still. I think it helps that I've always apologised and she knows I do my best to limit it.

Takeaway_Addict

GwylimT wrote: »

We aren't allowed to fix anything to the walls in our flat or change or add plaster boarding, if we do need to replace the plaster board it has to be the same type and we have to gain permission. How would we insulate our home?

Your landlord cannot stop you from doing this unless there are health and safety issues. As long as you leave it in the same condition as you got the house they cannot prevent changes.