Better half of 2014 - all about me

lulabelle

Hey MC. Good thanks. Boy came back and day after he came back after a lovely afternoon with his family told me he loves me - eek! Things have been even better since then. He makes me laugh, I fancy the pants off him, I admire him and he basically rocks my world! Scares the absolute !!!! out of me as worried I will get hurt but then if I don't give myself completely and trust what's the point?!

I am still not enjoying work and I really do think I want to do something else but I just can't identify what and it's not that bad at the moment so am coping.

MSE I'm not being tooooo bad though could do better. Training hasn't been great as been injured but ran once and trained once last week so aiming for more this week

Hope everyone else is good.

MarylandCookie_2

OH MY GOD LULA!!!!!!!!!! That's amazing, did you tell him back?? So happy for you, you sound really happy. And your right, if it's right, its right and you have to put yourself out there and embrace (and him obvs lol!!)

Know what you mean about work, I'm the same, been doing the same job for a while, good pay, conditions etc, but I'm stuck in a rut and want a change, but I just don't know what. It's such a risk to give all that up for something might not work or be right. Sure something will work out.

Hope your training is going better than mine!

PS: I'm coming up as a newbie as I logged myself out of my account and couldn't get logged back on so had to create a new account - I'm such a technophobe lol, I'm def not in IT!! But it's still me Maryland Cookie x

lulabelle

Yeah, I did! Well, I sort of hesitated at first as I wasn't expecting it and hid a bit! Thing was, I'd been feeling that way myself about him for a couple of weeks but because of past experience wanted him to say it first so was kind of shocked when he did!!! Anyway since then he's said it a couple of times more, once in a message and then again in person yesterday. Hate to jinx it but really does feel "right" with him.

Work not going so well. Think part of it might be coz I'm poorly (keep coming down with things) but I've hardly any work and that is stressing me out as my figures are bad and big boss (the horrid one I've had probs with before) said he's going to be speaking to people about their figures. If that happens I'm tempted just to say f*ck this and quit!!!

ellesbellesxxx

HI Lula, just caught up on your thread - really pleased to hear how it has worked out with the man that's great news
Also, hope work gets better xxxx

lulabelle

Sh1te day: difficult clients, someone has resigned and one of big bosses (nice one not horrid one) is basically saying I'll be taking on their workload which is fine I've said as long as I'm not put under same pressure I was in the summer

Went for a run tonight - 3 miles - much needed. Today wasn't as MSE as I'd intended. I had planned on coming home for lunch as didn't get time to make sandwich this am but as work kicked off I ended up buying one. Had to get some painkillers and a couple of cards so all in all about £8

Off to the boys for tea now and though will be nice to see him, part of me just wants to go to sleep

lulabelle

Another sh1te day. Worked through lunch then had conference call with barrister and clients from 5-730 - banging head afterwards. Went to the boys, drank wine (much needed) watched a !!!! film and ate pizza, cheesecake and chocolate and then came home

He's still poorly (flu) so it wasn't great and I don't know why (maybe it's low self esteem) but keep thinking it's some sort of front so he doesn't have to spend time with me which is stupid as he invited me to come over tomorrow night and also said he can't wait until we can sleep in same bed again (at the minute we've not been because he is sweating lots at night and coughing and doesn't want to keep me awake)

On the plus side I texted trainer at 550 this morning to say I wasn't coming then hauled my fat !!!! out of bed and told him I was on my way - so trained!!!

MSE not that bad, bought wine, sweets and choc so just under a tenner

Won't spend tomorrow as big boss (nice one) taking me out for lunch with a client and I'll either eat here in the evening from stores after run or go to the boys again

lulabelle

I still just don't know what to do about work and I am also spending when I shouldn't be.

Buffythedebtslayer

lulabelle wrote: »

I still just don't know what to do about work and I am also spending when I shouldn't be.

I too have been offered a job that I don't think I want!


I can't advise re job as I am rubbish at the moment, cannot make a decision.



Spending however.......just stop buying stuff for 24 hours, and see how long you can go without a purchase. just see.


If I had a pound for every time I browse amazon looking a fix I'd have a deposit for a house!


enjoy the weekend XX

lulabelle

God, what are we like? I just don't get how life can't be simple.

I've just noticed am losing my hair yet again. I think it's the stress of work again. I just feel like taking time off and getting some job I don't have to think about but I'm scared to do so

On another note, I kind of want the boy to move in. But it is too early to suggest it. Thinking maybe asking him mid summer when we've been on our various planned trips as by then will have been 6 months together. He just rocks my world

lulabelle

Work has gone downhill again. Due to staff changes I'm being asked to help out again which means being overloaded with work. Working for the nice boss but then the horrid one asked me to take on a matter (which he hats and is in a mess) for him. Bearing in mind he's given me no new work for about 18 months as he's been giving it to others (he only seems to want to use me when it suits him (i.e. When there's no-one else) and given my workload I've said no so he's now being difficult with me and making unhelpful comments then had the nerve to ask me what I'd been doing all morning as if I'd not been working (when I hadn't stopped). Am speaking to the nice one about it today. I'm on the edge of quitting and have been for a while. I just don't need this stress in my life, particularly when they move and mess me about all the time and I always do what I'm asked. I csnt overload myself again.