Can I afford to leave?

boltonangel

alwaysskint96 wrote: »

Perhaps house is connected to the husbands job? And she would have no right to stay if he wasnt there

This is the reason. I have no right to stay there if we split up, which is always made abundantly clear to me, I have no family etc over here so please believe that I am not taking this decision lightly and it is only now that I feel in a position where I feel the kids and I might be emotionally/financially strong enough to do it

Mojisola

boltonangel wrote: »

I went back to work as we we struggled for money, as my salary increased my husband stopped contributing financially. He has £20k saved up in HIS name, I do not want any of this so please don't judge me as the selfish one.

If you don't want it for yourself, you should be getting a share for the children's sake.

It doesn't matter whose name the savings are in - the money is still a marital asset and should be in the pot when the assets are divided up.

springdreams

Mojisola wrote: »

If you don't want it for yourself, you should be getting a share for the children's sake.

It doesn't matter whose name the savings are in - the money is still a marital asset and should be in the pot when the assets are divided up.

You could certainly use some of it to set up your new home.

Well to give you an example for utilities, these are some of mine for each month:

Council tax for single adult household £100
Gas £40
Electricity £40
TV Licence £13
Sky £45 (includes tv, broadband and landline)

Good luck.

[Deleted User]

I won't go into details as a lot has been covered already. But as a single parent of 2 primary school children my utility bills are:-

Gas & Elec - £50
TV licence - £12.12
Freeview box - £0
Broadband and calls £28
Water in and out - £10
Council Tax - £30 (I get council tax reduction)

Utilities can vary depending on the county you live and how frugal you wish to be with them. I expect my energy costs to increase as my children get older and use more. We are on a water meter and still having the adjusted due to being in credit.

boltonangel

Thank you!

Takeaway_Addict

If you have no debts etc then 26k is more than enough on average costs.

kingfisherblue

I agree that £26,000 is enough to live on, with a rent of £650. I have two teenagers, and because one has special needs I use a lot of gas and electricity(central heating coming on overnight in winter months, as he struggles to breathe in cold air, high electricity bills because of additional washing and tumble drying - can't have damp clothing around as this also affects his breathing). My combined gas and electricity per month comes to £109.

The first six months of paying for a TV licence by direct debit is higher, as you pay for the current year's licence in six months, then pay the following year six months in advance and six months in arrears - so your TV licence will be just over £18 to start with.

My water isn't metered, and costs a heft £50 a month - I am considering a meter though, but this may not be an option in rented accommodation.

Don't forget to think about contents insurance as well as utilities.

Council tax should be 25% cheaper as you will be the only adult.

Confusedandneedhelp

boltonangel wrote: »

Firstly, I am the primary carer for our children as my husbands only contact with them is for 5 mins each day on the way to school and for 2 hours each night after school until I get home. He is then in work in the evenings and all weekend. Please do not assume that because I don't do the school runs I do not care for my children as much as he does. I do the meals, the bath times, the bedtimes, the homework, the cleaning, the fun days out etc.

I am currently in the fortunate position where I don't pay utility bills so I'm unsure how much these total.

There seems to be the assumption that I am making this decision lightly, I am not. I have been with my husband since I was 16 so this way of life is all I've ever known but neither of us make each other happy anymore.....quite the opposite in fact.

Oh sorry your husband sacrifices his time with the kids to provide for them and your going to take them away for whatever reason. Sounds much better now...

Confusedandneedhelp

boltonangel wrote: »

I should also add that it isn't incredible that I don't know how much utility bills are, we don't pay them so wouldn't want to underestimate the true cost.
My dh would not fight for custody because he couldn't care for the children and work. I can.
My husband doesn't contribute towards the children's upbringing other than paying for the Sky contract and fuel for the school run I suppose.

I went back to work as we we struggled for money, as my salary increased my husband stopped contributing financially. He has £20k saved up in HIS name, I do not want any of this so please don't judge me as the selfish one.

I think u'll find your husband ur husband provides a home, all the bills, does the school runs ( presumebly maintains the house whilst u work) and pays for sky.

Which I think is quite a lot.

U get to enjoy the weekends with them, paying nothing outside of food and fuel. Hmmm Ye I can see why he might feel abit crap.

Now unless there's some SERIOUS reason u have failed to mention, u are taking the !!!! by saying he pays for sky and drops them off at school!

dancingfairy

I would say a) don't underestimate your food budget (I come from dfw board where that is a common problem) b) don't forget to include things that you pay for once a year such as christmas, car tax etc.
I think if you get to that point where you need to leave for your own sanity and the health and welfare of the children then you'll find a way to make it work.
Good Luck
df