seriously thinking of leaving

Mrs_Dawn

Hello HM
I don't post very often but after reading this thread felt you may need lots of support.
I've been in the same position as you and know how hard it is to make that jump.
Believe me the grass is greener on the other side, it may not seem like it a t first, but with the support of your family you and your lovely little girl will be so much better off.
And your self esteem will return and you will be so much stronger.
Take care hope you are both ok.
Please post soon.
Big hugs
Mrs Dawn xx

dawnybabes

Bump

Hope you are ok.

Reya

hannahsmummy1 wrote: »

He told me last night i was dragging him down by being in debt- we dont have anything in joint names so i dont understand that.

I do. I think he meant you were dragging his image down, not his financial situation. My ex-OH was the same. God forbid I should ever have done anything to make him look bad, in any situation. Before we went anywhere, especially to family occasions, I was given a list of things I was not allowed to talk about, and if I was in a shop and said something too loudly, or accidentally dropped a pen that I might have picked up to look at... well...

I'm still dealing with the @rsehole, even though he upped and left me last March for some girl 10 years younger than me that he met at work. I've had bailiffs calling at my house to try and execute warrants for his debt, and I've just found out that he's moved halfway across the country - no doubt in an attempt to run away from his debt. He's got a surprise coming, because it's going to follow him. I'll make sure of that.

What I'm trying to say is that controlling men will always try to impose their will upon you, and that saying about leopards and spots is a true one.

I just hope your radio silence on here is because you've finally done it, that you're busy sorting out your new life and you don't have time at the moment to get online and update us all.

Many hugs to you, hon. Even though it's hard when you're suddenly on your own (first time in 18 years for me) you and your daughter will be so much happier when you're free of this emotional bully.

Squiggly_Diddly

Just bumping along..... hoping for news soon.

joeblack066

Bumping again.....been where you are, I left, still clearing some of the debt but SO much better having ditched the abuse. Let us know you're ok hun. xx

bargainbetty

Just bumping it up.....

millionaire_in_training

Hmm strange that HM has not been back. Worrying. Really hope she's ok. Easy for the likes of me who is now a few years down the road to tell her it will be ok but I do remember how scary it all was at the time.

csarina

Hannahs Mummy, my daughter was just such a relationship as you are now, when her son was 2 she found the strength to go and see a solicitor who gave her the best advice in the world, LEAVE HIM, he explained exactly what she should do, she went to the council and was given a 3 bedroomed council house, she left him........she still has a half share interest in the house they bought together, but has brought the two children up on her own and they are the most delightful, well adjusted children you could wish to meet.

Yes she had to go to the CSA to get a reasonable amount for the children, and she worked at the weekends.....now she has just come off income support having been offered a job in the school the children attend.......

When they were living together the whole family had to sleep in one bedroom because the other bedroom was full of his computer equipment, he kept his bike in the sitting room and she had to fight every week to get money for food, he told her that she got the family allowance, that should be enough to feed and clothe the children.( he could afford to buy expensive computer equipment, but could not afford to feed her and the children)

I watched those children turn from repressed, clinging children into happy healthy children once they left the stifled atmosphere they were living in. They go to their fathers every weekend, and in fact they get on better now than when they were living together.............

You have to make up your own mind what to do, but ask yourself why are you the third wife, what happened with the other two, forget his family they are not important, you and your child are the important ones here. You have paid off your debts and are to be congratulated for that, you have proved that you do not need him. There is help out there for you and you have said yourself you would be better off.

trulymadlydeeply_indebt!

Bump!

Silence is golden - bah humbug!

Really hoping you're okay hun.

OliveOyl_2

Bumpety Bump