a fool in love

alias*alibi

tea_lover wrote: »

Well if the cap fits...

I was going to say trash is as trash does....:cool:

FBaby

Every couple I know who have got together whilst the man was still with his wife -have eventually split -because he's gone on to have another affair.

I have strong opinions on affairs, they are wrong, and I believe they should always be avoided, however, like other betrayals people indulge in, they happen. I personally find them no more immorals than wives/husbands who get themselves in serious debts through overspending and keep it a secret.

However, despite my views on affairs, I have the opposite experience to the above quote: the people I think of who had affairs have left their partner for the person they cheated with and haven't cheated again. I don't think it is black and white as people cheat for different reasons and it is these reasons that are indicators of the chances of cheating again rather than the cheating itself.

OP, I'm glad you are feeling ok about ending it. Did you tell him or have you just stopped all contact? How has it taken it?

tea_lover

That thread was about quantity, this is about quality. Completely different.

4given

:

alias*alibi wrote: »

I was going to say trash is as trash does....:cool:

:rotfl:

4given

FBaby wrote: »

I have strong opinions on affairs, they are wrong, and I believe they should always be avoided, however, like other betrayals people indulge in, they happen. I personally find them no more immorals than wives/husbands who get themselves in serious debts through overspending and keep it a secret.

However, despite my views on affairs, I have the opposite experience to the above quote: the people I think of who had affairs have left their partner for the person they cheated with and haven't cheated again. I don't think it is black and white as people cheat for different reasons and it is these reasons that are indicators of the chances of cheating again rather than the cheating itself.

OP, I'm glad you are feeling ok about ending it. Did you tell him or have you just stopped all contact? How has it taken it?

Thanks Fbaby I have ignored him and blocked him although he managed to sent me an email(junk) I was thinking of posting it here but because of some.......... maybe I shouldn't.

alias*alibi

4given wrote: »

:
:rotfl:

The past couple of posts you've sought out that have put you down you've put these silly little emoticon's on as if you think its funny or trying to show it's not bothering you. Well it clearly is and if the cap fits wear it. You have no shame and are getting more aggressive in each post. I wont be wasting anymore of my time reading your posts as I don't buy it; simple as.

4given

alias*alibi wrote: »

The past couple of posts you've sought out that have put you down you've put these silly little emoticon's on as if you think its funny or trying to show it's not bothering you. Well it clearly is and if the cap fits wear it. You have no shame and are getting more aggressive in each post. I wont be wasting anymore of my time reading your posts as I don't buy it; simple as.

:j:T,fine by me ,thanks I was not trying to be aggressive I appreciate your views as much.if u read the replies some posters have posted yes they have been harsh but helpful as well.Just being rude to me is not going to change anything.U could call me all the names u want but it won't change a thing,people like Fbaby,Duchy,Bucks lady,Tricky wicky etc have told me the truth "I did wrong" without resorting to childish insults.Once again thanks for your input.

Quizzical_Squirrel

4given wrote: »

have tried to end it but without success.

4given

[QUOTE=Quizzic
Thanks I like your poster, now I have ended it,it's still early days but I will be strong( lol sounds like a song)

Snakey

Seanymph wrote: »

...one of the things that reassured me about my husband when we got together was his faithful, 18 year history with his first wife.

I liked that about him.

I would not have liked it had he said he'd had affairs. Because if I was to hitch my waggon to his particular engine I want to know that he can do relationships....

Although, he'd hardly be likely to tell you if he'd spent those eighteen years having affairs. It would take a whole lot of cojones/stupidity to say to a potential new partner "well actually, I was seeing one of her friends for about a year and a half just after we had our daughter, and there was the work Christmas do in 1997 when I got a BJ in the toilets from one of the secretaries, and I'll never forget that girl I met on Neil's stag do who gave me the clap". For all you know, you just married someone who was too clever to have ever been found out.

I expect the OP's ex's wife, if you asked her, would tell you that there's no way her husband would ever have an affair.

A lot of moral dubiousness is the same - the main thing that marks the "bad" people as "bad" is that they got caught and what they did became public knowledge. Plenty of people around who've stolen from shops, told lies, driven after drinking, snogged someone else's partner, cheated in an exam, slagged off a friend behind their back etc but because nobody ever found out they can walk around looking normal and just like the rest of us.