Just needed to be heard for a little while

Waves_and_Smiles

Oh, and amusingly mindfulness techniques were a total disaster.

Focus on your body and feel its sensations-pain! liver failure!

Focus on your thoughts-sheer blind panic that I am about to die!

Focus on your breathing-can't breathe! dying right now.

Focus on the room around you-everything is spinning because I am dizzy! Dying again!

And so it continued...

I actually laughed to myself how utterly useless that was. It goes to show that you need varying techniques and therapies for different times!

whitewing

I certainly don't want to worry you into feeling that you have to be awake in case we are sitting at the computer at 4am. Shall we leave it that if you are up in the night/early hours and you need to, you will post. If I am up at any point (eg to see to DD), then I will log on briefly. .

I am sure others will keep an eye too, if they are up at any point.

And we promise not to panic at any posts in the night, as you will call an ambulance if need be. So we will wait until we hear from you tomorrow morning, afternoon or evening.

Waves_and_Smiles

Aww, thank you LIR. Just if you happen to be awake. If I haven't posted it means I am asleep which would be a very good thing!

That's so lovely whitewing, thank you. It is so reassuring to know that I have people looking out for me.

elsien

Your mindfulness post did make me chuckle. I've tried mindfulness a couple of time and both times I think I spent the (short) session wondering how long until the alarm to tell me I'd done my time would go off. And wondering what Gitdog was up that he shouldn't be in my absence.

jobbingmusician

That IS quite a brilliant idea, to use ice to displace pain! I might get DH to do that as a distraction technique, as well.

I also wonder if it would be worth drawing a picture of yourself as you would like to be - pain free and healthy. And as you draw each limb/organ/whatever, really visualise it pain and panic free.

LOLOL Elsien - I haven't said yet how much I adore Gitdog, have I?

System

I'm more of a lurker (but also long term mental health sufferer/survivor/however you want to think of it!) and am quite often up around that time so just wanted to say if you need to chat and i'm around i'm told i'm a good listener i know it can be scary when you're in that frame of mind but don't want to worry anyone

re:panic attacks, when i get them i try and ground myself, i think its similar to mindfulnes which i know you said didn't help, but i look around and describe things, like the lampshade is green, the window is open, the tv if off, little things like that, i get focused on describing things and sometimes it helps evade the forthcoming panic attack by distracting me

Waves_and_Smiles

Hahahahaha! Sometimes minfulness does help me but it is clearly not the thing for me to use with panic attacks. Focusing on how each part of me was, was the worse move ever! Despite the fear it did give me a giggle. though. I was worse afterwards!

That's a thought JM! It would also work as a distraction which is what I ended up doing. I was desperately trying to breathe while washing dishes by 4am to try and make myself focus on something else.

Aww, thank you. MU. Now you see, that could help. the mindfulness techniques I was taught focused on how you would feel if you were an alien in a human body for the first time so you concentrated on how each part of you felt (Answer- Like I am dying!). If I had been alien in this body last night I would have jumped into my spaceship and fled at the speed of light!

whitewing

At some point, you could try and source some flameless wax candles that you can have when you are alone

http://www.flamelesscandles.com.au/

Pyxis

Waves_and_Smiles wrote: »

I read back on some of the posts here that I made during or shortly after an episode and it seems like someone else wrote them. As the psychosis recedes it takes a lot of the memories with it and it just feels like a dream you once had.

Do you know WaS, all your posts have been extremely useful, whether to people with MH issues, or to people without, who are learning about them, and by learning about them, may be in a position to help someone one day. So please don't delete any, or think that they are pointless and self-indulgent, because they jolly well aren't; they are extremely useful and very altruistic, because who knows how many people with problems may be reading this thread and thinking, "OMG, at last! Someone who is feeling what I am feeling!" And so those people will no longer feel so very alone, and that in itself may stop someone doing something to themselves, and may prompt them to seek help. Who knows how many people you may have already helped in huge ways, not just the people who post on this thread, but people who just visit? If it helps only ONE single person, it has been infinitely worthwhile, don't you think?

All the more reason to, when you feel up to it of course, print out this thread, so that it is never lost.



And on a lighter note...............pug tights???:rotfl:

lostinrates wrote: »

I don't think you should reveal where you are because its against board rules and you are vulnerable, but its frustrating that one or two of us might be close.

WaS, you are first class at knowing when you don't need to worry your partner or ring A&E, but that it would be so nice for you to be able to contact someone, even if only by email, when you are feeling like you did last night.
At any other time, it's very likely that someone would have been around on the thread to respond to you.
Is there someone on this thread who you trust enough to tell the county you are in, by a PM? Then, we could PM that person with our own county, which would give an indication of whether anyone was near you. Then we could just take it from there. Entirely up to you, goes without saying.





WaS, I need to start thinking about the dress, because it's going to be a nightmare. At one point today I thought 'I'll make it' then realised I wanted to look good, so went back to online shopping. Its quite a sober environment and a function I'll be going as dh's guest, so I'll be buying. Dress that's 'not very me' which I wouldn't mind, I love the whole 'costume' thing of women's clothes, but when the impact when I put it on is going to be disappointing it feels disappointing. I have shoes that will go with most things ( but I think DH might need new evening shoes).
I found one dress but I think its too loud, a bit too relaxed, and ......rather expensive. But at least I'd wear it again.

LIR, do you know what I think? I think that if you wear an outfit that's not you, you are going to feel uncomfortable and unattractive, stiff and ill at ease. Why not go for something that is 'you', but maybe a toned-down version of 'you'? I don't know what 'you' is, so can't suggest further, but if you're usually drawn to colour, and are thinking now in terms of a 'corporate' suit, why not look for a two piece, either skirt or trousers, that's more colourful, or more quirky? If it's tasteful, and is accessorised imaginatively, it can look as formal as the darkest of boring corporate suits! It could even be a two-piece made up of two,separate pieces that complement, rather than match!





Edit. OMG! Didn't realise this was so long!

whitewing

Could DP leave you with a flask of warmish water? I am thinking it is hard to cry and be upset while drinking, yet it is often the last thing you feel like doing.

Maybe drink through a straw (or a clean, empty biro) so it is a different feel to focus on.