Dating outside your race

barbiedoll

I work (and live) in London and it is getting more common to see a white man with a black woman, but then again, the area in which I work is home to such a diverse population that it is very rare for me to see a couple where both of them are white Caucasian!

Recent pairings include: an Italian woman with a Jamaican man. An African woman with a (white) French man. A woman from Hong Kong, married to a German. A white South African man with a black SA woman....the list is endless.

I do ask a lot of couples where they met and nearly all of them met whilst living and working in London. OP, there is someone out there for you, you don't have to be limited to a man of your race/ethnicity.

I used to date a half-Indian guy but people always used to ask me where I'm from. (Apparently, I look a bit "foreign"!!) When one of my elderly relatives asked him where he was from "originally", he replied "Woolwich" :rotfl::rotfl:

susieq87

This forum did actually help me with my confidence when approaching a different race. I just got chatted up by a handsome Caucasian service guy who came to have a look at something in my flat. He was overly flirting with me and asked for my number. Unfortunately I had to decline because he is a smoker but yay me!
Also the coworker I have my eye on had a one on one training session with me, I tried to be engaging and talk about other stuff apart from work at least he now knows I exist! (He is so cute omg!) had a moment there!
Thanks everyone.

MrsE_2

Buzzybee90 wrote: »

This topic came up on big brother last year when one housemate said they preferred their men to have a Mediterranean complexion (like Dan, a different housemate) and they received a warning for racism....!

My fav would be olive skinned Mediterranean men

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=zLrUJY4D5Bc


http://tasithoughts.com/2008/12/11/sakis-rouvas-as-hot-as-ever/

MrsE_2

Robisere wrote: »

I was fortunate to have a father who brought up his 3 sons to believe that there is only one race: the Human Race. Why else can every single human male or female, can interbreed with every other female or male, if both are fertile?!

Totally agree, I disliked the thread title, I've only ever dated other humans (sorry OP not having a dig at you) & I dislike the term mixed race (human & what!).

In animal terms its like a dark haired cat & a light haired cat getting it on, no big deal.

Prothet_of_Doom

susieq87 wrote: »

pardon me if i come across a little defensive here but are you implying that there are not many black middle class men/women?

You are taking the p!55 ?


No, I'm saying that in my both my social and work circles, I rarely meet anyone that isn't white and middle class and male.

duchy

I grew up in London and then in Surrey.
Technically I guess I am mixed race as my Mother and my paternal grandparents were all immigrants and there's two religions in that mix too. All white so my non British cultural background wasn't immediately evident.

I've lived in various places but it came as an abrupt shock when in my forties I went to work in a high school in a rural and very insular community where most of the kids had never had a friend or relation who wasn't white British. Some of the kids assumptions about other ethnic backgrounds was astounding and quite scary. I felt like I'd stepped back in time. They were genuinely amazed that black people (their term) were the same as them when I challenged some of their assumptions.

SailorSam

I'm white but race or colour isn't something i think about if i meet someone i like. It's the person that matters.

lulu_92

I'm white-asian and my OH is half-Irish, which isn't a massively mixed race couple, but I get so frustrated that his family think it's okay to be racist around me, knowing full well what my background is! It makes me feel that they can't accept who I am - they asked if we were getting married in a church "because [they] are a Catholic family". I responded by asking when the last time they went to mass was and said if we were going to play the religion card we will get married in a Mosque because I'm from a Muslim Family :rotfl:

The only person who truly understands is OHs dad. He moved over from Ireland when he was a kid and got a lot of grief, especially during the time of the IRA.

ladymarmalade1970

My children are mixed race. I come from a normal white family background with no other ethnicities than white British.

I am female. With my first black boyfriend (African decent but English) i spotted him in a club and was instantly attracted to him. It was only after i thought "oh, but he's black". It wasn't an issue. More of an awakening in that i had never really looked at people of different colours/culture before.

After going out with him for a while i looked at other people of colour. I don't mean this to sound rude but it was like discovering a whole new species! It was just something i had never considered before. This was in the 80's and i suppose it just wasn't the done thing and there weren't that many people of colour where i lived.

I think its the same with white men. They just don't consider it as they don't see it so in your case i think you have to forget about colour and focus on you, your personality and what you want.

The right man won't even notice the colour.

A guy i went to Uni with is now with a woman of African decent AND she has a child that isn't his so i don't think when cupid shoots his arrow it really makes much of a difference.

Incidentally, i still find black men the most attractive however i ended up with a white man :-D. It's all about the personality and he is perfect for me.

Find the beauty in yourself and be proud of it. It's this sort of thing that really shines through and people are attracted to.

Good luck.

Oh and just as an aside. I got my partner off match.com 8 years ago and have never been happier so don't give up on dating sites.

DJS1988

Race, religion etc doesn’t really occur to me, if I meet someone I like, I like them. I’m white, and have had white, mixed & black partners.

When I was a teenager, I came across some horrible comments when I was out with my black then-boyfriend. Mostly from white, older males, and black females. My family were not happy about the relationship, but more so because they saw the effect the abuse had on me (it made me quite angry that the world was that unfair) and because (as I found out later….) the guy was a bit of a tool!

My partner is mixed – his dad is black British (carribean descent) and mum white British/Irish. I love the mix of his family, as in my experience, a lot of the older generation I’ve come across have some racism in them, even if buried. However I think because much of his white family went through the issues that came with moving here from Ireland years back, they’ve experienced racism first hand.

However, my Grandad, who I thought of anyone may have an issue with my choice of partner (he’s “old-school” – not that I believe that’s an excuse for certain things I have heard him say..) adores him. In this relationship I have never experience any real issues, a few slightly out-of-line jokes, but in fairness me and my OH make them ourselves at times.