Help Please - Is life worth living?

dianadors

I take my hat off to all you single parents - you do an amazing job. Scorpiolady - sign up for free films on the Freeby thread and keep your eyes peeled for the free codes. You can generally get tickets for at least 1 film per week. Last weeks offer was for 4 tickets to see Firehouse Dog. You get to see the films ages before they are released. You can also use the freeby site to bagsy loads of treats for yourself to boost your morale (I got about £30 haircare stuff from Pantene last week) and you can also get most of your Christmas pressies from this too (I do). Pick yourself up, dust yourself down and pat yourself on the back.

sammy115

Scorpiolady.....

You sound to me as if you need some counselling. I think even if you had money you would still have problems 'letting yourself go' as it were. You need to find a balance between doing the best for your children and having a life yourself which would boost your confidence in all areas. Can your doctor refer you to a counsellor. If not Relate are good (not just for couple counselling and will only charge if you can afford).

I can't stress enough how much counselling has helped me over the years and enabled me to cope with a lot of crap...

Glad to see you are feeling better, you are not on your own.

southwester_2

I agree with dianadors, you should be very proud of bringing up 2 wonderful children on your own. Your not lonely any more , you've got us!!!

LJD1_2

Hiya
Great to hear you sounding more positive. Keep posting on here as there's usually someone around to advise or just have a natter with. Look after yourself xx

chocolatechipcookies

ScorpioLady wrote: »

Been reading these boards for ages but only just plucked up the courage to post in this forum.
I am almost 50, and am a single parent to 2 children aged 11 and 13.
For the last 10 years (since my ex left us all) I have been working, (initially making a loss due to childcare), but even with tax credits, have been gradually getting myself more into debt.
I have managed to keep my house which is worth £190K, (owe Abbey £65K) with a secured loan (First Plus, yes I know!!!!!) of £15k and now have credit cards owing £12k.
Due to the horrible stresses etc at work and the pressure of one parenthood (no family support, no ex around for weekend access) I had a breakdown a year ago and have been unable to work since. I am receiving Incapacity Benefit. I am still quite ill but of course the debt aspect is making me worse.
Spoke to CCCS and (with respect) their response was "go away until you owe a lot more!!!"
I have claimed on First Plus insurance but they are wriggling due to the fact I have taken anti depressants in the past.
Having been a single parent twice (the first two children have grown and left home) I think I must have a degree in budgetting (although you'll probably disagree having read the above figures) but even when working, living for nearly 30 years with only one income takes its toll. My ex owes me thousands thru the CSA.
Am trying to sell the house to address the problem but can't seem to see any light at the end of the tunnel.
To date I have no defaults and have a perfect credit rating but can't carry on paying these debts (only keeping afloat due to selling things on ebay!). Can't remortgage due to being on benefits and feel suicidal really, and SO, SO terribly tired of the whole responsibility on my shoulders.
Everything to do with children is so expensive, school trips, uniforms etc etc (Was going to go to the pictures last weekend but it would cost £17.00 for 83 mins...........how ridiculous is that!). Havent had a holiday for 20 years and never ever go out socialising. (Live in a high maintenance very old house wth leaking roof!)
If you've read this far then thank you and I apologise for boring you all on a Saturday evening, but I just don't see that live is worth living at all!

Of course life is worth living. Think about how devastated your kids would be if anything happened to you. How angry they would be for a very long time if you left them. I don't know what I can say to help, but things will get better. Have faith!

steve700

Hi Scorpio Lady,

How are things with you and your two children now?

Hopefully you have had a chance to go over everything with CCCS or Payplan.

Let us know how you are?

Have a nice weekend

Steve

jo1972

Hi Scorpio Lady,

I've just read your post for the first time, must've missed it previously. I hope that things have started looking up for you now and you've sorted somesort of payment plan out.

I think you are fantastic, holding everything together for your kids. They are the most important thing in your life and so I know the strength they give you will pull you through this.

Good luck and look forward to you posting again

Jo.x

candygirl

Yeah how you getting on hun?Hope things are improving for you:p

marksandsparksgal

Hiya,

I just wanted to throw my two cents (or should that be pence!) in and say, well done for getting on here, they are a great bunch, and secondly, good luck.

Remember, anytime you feel fed up, there will be people on here who can help.

Keep smiling.

My tip:

If you have access to a garden (hope the agrophobia is ok if you are in your own garden if you have one), and spend an hour chilling out in the sun.

Oh, and join Quidco!

LittlePiskey

Its hard but try and hang on in there - you may be struggling at the moment but from what you've said you seem to have a lot to be proud of - bringing up and supporting your children on your own must have been incredibly trying for you. Before you do anything else take a visit to your doctor and tell him how you're feeling - your health is so much more important than money!

If you take a look on adviceguide.org.uk you can search for your local cab and they have direct telephone numbers in there too so maybe you could try calling and speaking to someone.

x