Time to start out on my own

NaughtySpot

I didn't want to read and run, I think you are being incredibly brave and resourceful so please be proud of what you've done so far.

xJOJOx wrote: »

One point I haven't said is when he's not drinking he is a very good guy, it just it's been a while since then.

I am sure he is a good guy, but he is a drunk. Until he stops being a drunk he doesn't deserve any time with your lovely children, he needs to earn it. It is a disease but he has to want to get better. I wouldn't compromise on this at all, this is about the childrens' safety and not about how he feels.

DancerSupreme

I was going to ask about getting OH kicked out. Women's Aid may have some advice about how your boss could go about this. Is he on the tenancy agreement? Could he go and stay with relatives so you can continue to think of the kids' continuity (which as a parent he should surely be concerned over too...!)? Was there any condition imposed when he began working for you boss I.e. it was for the duration of your contract etc?


Def get in touch with that guy. He sounds like he could be your lifeline xxx

nolongerindenial

There are a few good guys out there, and your boss seams like one of them!

If I was you I would go and speak to him right away as he may hold some of the answers you need in terms of housing, work etc and be able to take all the stress away

Nlid (a fellow good guy or so I'm told)

xJOJOx_2

DancerSupreme wrote: »

I was going to ask about getting OH kicked out. Women's Aid may have some advice about how your boss could go about this. Is he on the tenancy agreement? Could he go and stay with relatives so you can continue to think of the kids' continuity (which as a parent he should surely be concerned over too...!)? Was there any condition imposed when he began working for you boss I.e. it was for the duration of your contract etc?


Def get in touch with that guy. He sounds like he could be your lifeline xxx

Boss is currently ringing him and talking to him. He doesn't want kev there regardless whether I return or not. I'm not sure how he will tell him, but he'll properly just tell him. Wheat her he offers him a room elsewhere or not I'm not sure. He doesn't want him above a pub though.

Accommodation comes with my job and not his. The boss made this very clear when we moved in.

Willowpop

Hi Jojo, let us know what happens with your boss and where you're living. Your boss sounds like a nice chap, and like you say it'll be great for you to still have a job and your own place if it's safe.

Regarding the kids and their dad, as has already been said, he most likely is a good guy when sober, but he can't stay sober when he is with the kids by the sounds of it. If you can't trust him to look after the kids then he shouldn't be alone with them. Supervised visits might be the way forward, whilst he can't take care of them on his own?

You're doing the right thing, never doubt that. You have to look after yourself and the kids, whatever that takes.

xJOJOx_2

Not hEard back from boss yet, he's a very busy man but hopefully will heard something today.

Decided to give o/h opportunity with kids but only during the day. If there back by 7 there's no chance of him drinking whilst there asleep etc if he doesn't stick to the terms then we're go down the other route.

Trying to find ballerina bits and bots for daughter with a budget off £20 on eBay, very poor lady this week x

asparagus1968

hi, just wanted to wish you all the best poppet.


have a look on local netmums site for bits and bobs for the girls, can post "wanted" ads as well as for sale for free.

xJOJOx_2

asparagus1968 wrote: »

hi, just wanted to wish you all the best poppet.


have a look on local netmums site for bits and bobs for the girls, can post "wanted" ads as well as for sale for free.

Cheers, not been on net mums before will try there thanks x

jaxsmar

just wanted to day good luck your doing the right thing. You could try Gingerbread charity for single parents. I am sure they will give you some practical advice. Remember to take your paperwork (birth certificates passports you are going to need them of proof later with any paperwork) Have you got your own bank account? Cancel any direct debits that wont apply. Let us know how things are going.

xJOJOx_2

Just playing the waiting game at the moment, waiting to hear back from everyone.

I'm thinking no matter what happens, I may keep my application form in for housing. May be best to have somewhere off my own and then we've always secure. If it's near the pub, can always continue with work but then actually be away from work when not on shift.

Managed to source enough things for little ones dance class, still need some extras but they can wait til next week. Will just spread things out as and when can afford them. O/h said he will go half but never gave me any money, don't want to keep asking.

Will have a nosey at gingerbread charity thanks.

Can't wait for some news off anybody, then I can move onwards

Xxx