Letter from School quoting Abusive Language

cte1111

fufu_banterwaite wrote: »

Oh for goodness sake stop whinging - you are sounding like a child now!

Thanks so much for your positive contribution. This is evidently another non-slight that I would be over-sensitive not to be delighted to read.

I did want to hear people's opinions. I didn't necessarily want to be insulted but there you go, strangers on the internet are an unknown quantity. I have taken it on board that people think that including the transcript was necessary to shock parents. I'm not a big believer in shock tactics but perhaps they were appropriate in this case.

Blackpool_Saver

HPoirot wrote: »

You seem to be all out to protect your own sensibilities at all costs - what about your daughter's sensibilities, who for all intents and purposes may well be reading and hearing these things from her classmates??

There is no doubt that she will be.

I would be very surprised if she was as shocked at the transcript as her mother.

We live in a sad/sick world and we need to teach our children to be resilient and to make THEIR own good choices. You cannot make other people change, you can only control your own actions. Your daughter needs to learn to be discerning HERSELF.

cte1111

I might try to talk to the head about it next week, although probably won't, given that most people think her actions were reasonable. It is very difficult to get hold of the headteacher, as the only time she makes herself available to parents is during the school day, when I am at work. I couldn't ring her when I got home, as I know she is always in meetings immediately after school.

lostinrates

cte1111 wrote: »

I might try to talk to the head about it next week, although probably won't, given that most people think her actions were reasonable. It is very difficult to get hold of the headteacher, as the only time she makes herself available to parents is during the school day, when I am at work. I couldn't ring her when I got home, as I know she is always in meetings immediately after school.

Could you email her, or send her a letter?

cte1111

sulphate wrote: »

It's the parents' responsibility NOT to leave something like that lying around if they are worried about their child finding it! Not the headteacher's.

Given that some parents have not noticed that their children have somehow picked up very adult thoughts and language and then chatted away about it on the internet, it seems a little ironic to then assume that they would safeguard a letter from the school so keenly. I'll make sure the letter is well out of my children's way.

I think it's the headteacher's responsibility to ensure that she doesn't inadvertently offend parents but I'm in the very small minority on here.

fufu_banterwaite

cte1111 wrote: »

Thanks so much for your positive contribution. This is evidently another non-slight that I would be over-sensitive not to be delighted to read.

I did want to hear people's opinions. I didn't necessarily want to be insulted but there you go, strangers on the internet are an unknown quantity. I have taken it on board that people think that including the transcript was necessary to shock parents. I'm not a big believer in shock tactics but perhaps they were appropriate in this case.

That wasn't an insult, merely a comment on your attitude. I actually wrote two longer posts giving my opinions on this but you have neglected to mention that and picked up on this one part of a message.

You are the only one who seems shocked by this and I think that should tell you something about your outlook rather than anyone elses.

larkrisetocandleford

Really OP you do need to take a step back here. If the school had simply sent a woolly letter alluding to bad language many parents would have assumed it referred to something far less nasty. The school did exactly the right thing in my view and as a parent I would be happy that they had taken the issue so seriously, that is how you protect your children, by being informed, fully informed.

As for it being seen by your child, really? Do you not have personal information that is kept out of the way of your children? I am afraid I see that as a red herring. Once read you have complete control over where it is placed or how it is disposed of, your child will only see it if you do not take steps to prevent that.

The school was entirely correct to take this course of action and if it offends your sensibilities then you need to address that issue because parenting can and does get tougher.

Top_Girl

cte1111 wrote: »

I might try to talk to the head about it next week, although probably won't, given that most people think her actions were reasonable. It is very difficult to get hold of the headteacher, as the only time she makes herself available to parents is during the school day, when I am at work. I couldn't ring her when I got home, as I know she is always in meetings immediately after school.

Make an appointment and/or take the time off as leave or make the time up. It's clearly very important to you, it is certainly worth having a conversation with the head about.


Although, FWIW, I think the head got this absolutely spot on.

cte1111

lostinrates wrote: »

Could you email her, or send her a letter?

That's what I have done in the past. Thanks for the helpful suggestion. It does make a discussion difficult though. She's also rather tended to ignore anything with any hint of criticism, which makes me feel that I'm wasting my time.

ecgirl07

cte1111 wrote: »

Thanks so much for your positive contribution. This is evidently another non-slight that I would be over-sensitive not to be delighted to read.

I did want to hear people's opinions. I didn't necessarily want to be insulted but there you go, strangers on the internet are an unknown quantity. I have taken it on board that people think that including the transcript was necessary to shock parents. I'm not a big believer in shock tactics but perhaps they were appropriate in this case.

If the letter had said "children have been engaging in abusive Skype conversations with each. The language used is sexual in nature" would you have imagined it to be as bad as it was?

If the answer is no then the transcript was necessary to fully inform you as a parent.