Letter from School quoting Abusive Language

Blackpool_Saver

cte1111 wrote: »

I might try to talk to the head about it next week, although probably won't, given that most people think her actions were reasonable. It is very difficult to get hold of the headteacher, as the only time she makes herself available to parents is during the school day, when I am at work. I couldn't ring her when I got home, as I know she is always in meetings immediately after school.

I hope you aren't too upset at the responses.
Please post a follow up post. I would be interested in the reaction of other parents at the school too.

Good luck

fufu_banterwaite

cte1111 wrote: »

I think it's the headteacher's responsibility to ensure that she doesn't inadvertently offend parents but I'm in the very small minority on here.

It is the headteacher's responsibility to ensure the best for her school and its pupils. How she does this is up to her. If she has to offend one parent out of every 20 say (which seems to be you) then that is a small price to pay.

mrcow

I think sometimes schools can get it very wrong. This is a case in point. There was no need to include a transcript. An explanation of how inappropriate would have more than sufficed.

If your daughter is in year six, then I guess it's up to you. Personally, I see no harm in writing a letter to enforce how inappropriate you found the communication.

claire21

What was the opening part of the letter before the actual conversation? Did the school say in the letter the reason for the whole conversation, ie did they try and say they wanted parents to be aware of exactly what went on?

Edit
If the letter had come in two pages with an opening explanation of the gist of went on, then telling you on page 2 the offensive conversation was fully listed, would you have read page 2?

HPoirot

cte1111 wrote: »

I think it's the headteacher's responsibility to ensure that she doesn't inadvertently offend parents but I'm in the very small minority on here.

Honestly OP, this is not about offending you, it is about getting you on board to protect your daughter from all of it. Surely you must have twigged on to that by now? It is not about you, it is about what children of your daughter's age get up to.

lostinrates

cte1111 wrote: »

That's what I have done in the past. Thanks for the helpful suggestion. It does make a discussion difficult though. She's also rather tended to ignore anything with any hint of criticism, which makes me feel that I'm wasting my time.

Um, you would criticise?

I would have hoped, having had a wave of feedback, you might go to gain an understanding and even express concern and ask for a barometer of how much she felt this was playground language.

In response to your husbands concerns about other people leaving the letter about, I suppose if they are that sort of parent they might leave the screen of the computer unsupervised too.

Georgiegirl256

cte1111 wrote: »

I'm not particularly delighted about being called a slumbering parent who has a child with no boundaries. This isn't what I said in my posts, but people are choosing to jump on anything they can to have a go and be unpleasant.

Now you're making up your own agenda. No one called you a slumbering parent, nor did they say your child has no boundaries. It seems that you are just way too sensitive about a lot of things.

Regarding leaving the letter lying around so that the child could potentionally read it, well that is the parents responsibility not to do that.

mrcow

fufu_banterwaite wrote: »

It is the headteacher's responsibility to ensure the best for her school and its pupils. How she does this is up to her. If she has to offend one parent out of every 20 say (which seems to be you) then that is a small price to pay.

If a headteacher can't do their job without offending 1 in 20 of their parents, they should be looking for alternative employment. Most headteachers manage to perform their jobs perfectly adequately without offending parents or sending out letters containing details of offensive conversations.

My school seem to be able to capably manage such incidents without any upset or offence caused. Perhaps the OP's headteacher should take a leaf out of our book.

balletshoes

cte1111 wrote: »

Given that some parents have not noticed that their children have somehow picked up very adult thoughts and language and then chatted away about it on the internet, it seems a little ironic to then assume that they would safeguard a letter from the school so keenly. I'll make sure the letter is well out of my children's way.

I think it's the headteacher's responsibility to ensure that she doesn't inadvertently offend parents but I'm in the very small minority on here.

you do? in all circumstances? So would you honestly rather not have know at all, because the language offends you, that this was going on in your daughter's year, her peer group?
As others have pointed out (and I hope you have taken on board) the actual transcript was sent so that parents could see for themselves what had gone on, it wasn't sent out to offend parents, and it wasn't summarised because that would be the head teacher giving their slant on the content of the transcript.

I've never felt that it was any school officials job to take care to not offend parents (even inadvertently) in the course of their duties and responsibilities to the children in their care.

CH27

cte1111 wrote: »

Given that some parents have not noticed that their children have somehow picked up very adult thoughts and language and then chatted away about it on the internet, it seems a little ironic to then assume that they would safeguard a letter from the school so keenly. I'll make sure the letter is well out of my children's way.

I think it's the headteacher's responsibility to ensure that she doesn't inadvertently offend parents but I'm in the very small minority on here.

Do you not think your daughter's welfare is more important than your sensibilities.
All that's coming across is me me me & there is no concern about your daughter at all.