talk me down please

meritaten

so younger sis is the one who was always 'at home' and available with a supportive ear? the one who everyone went to for support as she would defend you to the death? and vilified anyone who wasn't 100% on their side? who was so 'Nice' and did all they could to 'Help' you - while stirring the Sh!!? and interfering in the name of 'sisterly support'. I get the picture.
Its always 'Aunt' involved isn't it? she is like a bluddy 'gamesmaster' and everyone is just chess pieces to be moved about to suit her plans.

mellymoo74

meritaten wrote: »

so younger sis is the one who was always 'at home' and available with a supportive ear? the one who everyone went to for support as she would defend you to the death? and vilified anyone who wasn't 100% on their side? who was so 'Nice' and did all they could to 'Help' you - while stirring the Sh!!? and interfering in the name of 'sisterly support'. I get the picture.
Its always 'Aunt' involved isn't it? she is like a bluddy 'gamesmaster' and everyone is just chess pieces to be moved about to suit her plans.

Yep. Always available didn't have kids of her own so cultivated SIL treats niece in particular like a grand daughter so niece stays at hers and not her nans. Got niece anything she wanted whenever she wanted it.

mellymoo74

When it all kicked off a couple of weeks ago OH left aunt a voice mail telling her she wasn't Florence nightingale and MIL had told us she was horrid to her when on their own.

Aunt told OH this was why it was his fault MIL going in hospice

mellymoo74

I'm thinking now. The last falling out where MIL had decided we hadn't been married long guess who had seen the marriage certificate and denied it......

meritaten

dangerous woman. BUT legally your OH and SIL have far more rights in MILs care than her sister does - that is why she needs SIL on her side.
its a difficult situation. I need to think on this.

mellymoo74

Thanks Meri

meritaten

melly - it sounds like your MIL is too weak to take any control. your OH needs to find out what SHE wants to do. he needs to get in there and TALK to her. and tbh at this stage of her illness - she isn't keeping 9 to 5 hours IYKWIM?

mellymoo74

She's there all the time.
I'm gonna go with him tomorrow and suggest that Aunt has a break if that fails I'm going to tell her that we are going to leave OH and his mum too it as they should have some time alone.

meritaten

well any reasonable person would respect that.

mellymoo74

Let's see if she's reasonable (I think we both know there will be a kicking off of some kind)