talk me down please

mellymoo74

pollyanna_26

HI again Melly . I'm glad to see oh has said he's sorry . You not engaging with him when he is not hearing logic gives head space to you both rather than things continuing to escalate . I hope you are getting a chance to rest and upstairs have stopped the racket .
As I have said before baby steps are the way to go at the moment .
Priority tomorrow is Drs appointment - If he decides he isn't going although hopefully he will , go yourself as his appointee and make dr aware of his present state of mind and the way things have escalated anxiety wise and also the effect on your own wellbeing . This will stop a cancelled appointment showing and will mean a record of his current state of mind will go on his notes .
Glad to see you haven't lost the cooking mojo .
I really hope in time things can sort out for you both . All you really want is to be secure and happy . It has taken years for things to fall apart and it will take time and effort to get that stability back . I was thinking of the wedding photograph you posted a long time ago on the other thread , there is still hope and things can get sorted in time
A better meds regime for oh could begin to lower his anxiety levels and help him engage with proper help .
The other issues such as housing can wait until you have the Drs and pip meetings over .
I hope this posts as I have twice lost a post , fingers crossed
Love
polly x

mellymoo74

Thanks Pol

I have suggested that he also speaks to Doc about some heavy duty anti anxiety medication to get him to PIP appeal.

He acknowledge's that he has been panicking and working himself up about it and additional chemical support might be useful.

I can always cook, as you know anorexics have a preoccupation with food (obsession) so cooking is a hobby.

You also know I was expecting a lot of fall out after MIL died but I think the loss of the therapist in Jan when he was actually just sharing the horrid stuff has magnified it leading to this.

He's not as bad as he sounds and if we can get him on an even keel again he's funny and kind it's just the last couple of years he has been mean and selfish.

I will probably be going with him to the docs anyway so can make sure they are aware of his current mental state. Need help with CMHT really need a home visit from them.

So you think having the FSW attend is beneficial? I'm not sure he's gonna react well to seeing her and is going to be under enough stress hmm I will sleep on it but any thoughts would be welcome.

pollyanna_26

Melly you don't have to explain ohs behaviour to me love . I know times used to be happy for you both - I remember your positive posts and I also understand how poor treatment and let downs can cause terrible damage .
I do think you have the right idea of things to say to the doctor and the cmht is probably the way to go .
Regarding the useless FSW I would be inclined to mention the problem to the doctor as she is making the situation worse at the worst possible time . Is the guy who helped you with the appeal form going to be there on Tuesday ? He sounds a much better option .
Hopefully things will be calmer tonight and you can rest .
Love
polly x

mellymoo74

He is thankfully
I might call her boss tomorrow and say considering we are supposed to have a wellbeing call weekly and we haven't, she's turning up to meetings after saying she isn't coming and not letting me know
And OH doesn't trust her I think it's best if she doesn't attend and we look at someome else taking over OH if that's not possible remove service.

pollyanna_26

Melly That's a good plan . It is not helping either of you to be dealing with people who only make the situation worse . I sometimes wonder how these people get their jobs considering the responsability for others welfare they have and their inability to ensure things work . I would be surprised if you are the first person to complain .
Anyway I'm off to bed , see you tomorrow and hope you both get some sleep .
Night night love
polly x

Smodlet

Those are some privileged puss-ee cats (MSE, hah!)
S xxx

pollyanna_26

Hi Melly just popping in to wish you well today . I hope you both feel a bit brighter today and all goes well at the doctors .
Love polly x

mellymoo74

Thanks Pol
He's asleep still gonna get him up a 3 for a 4.30pm appointment

Just started sorting this place out my internal temp gauge is broken I am in a vest and sweating buckets (it's 14 degrees)

pollyanna_26

Hi melly spotted your post as I was about to log out . I'm about to catch up on some housework too . It's been raining here since last night and finally stopped about an hour ago . Very grey but humid again which doesn't help the fibro .
Will be thinking of you both and will catch up later - hope the dr will give oh some strong meds to get him through tomorrow - our gp prescribes a small amount of tramadol at such times and increases the dose when needed .
Good luck see you later
polly x