Best friend, birthday

marisco_2

Buzzybee90 wrote: »

This is just odd.

What is odd is that you measure the strength and worth of a friendship, that you have shared with someone since your school days, against whether she sends you a bit of paper with a pretty picture on it and some sentiments.

Buzzybee90

wapow wrote: »

Its a shame you people expect so much off people you make friends with. Why throw them a big party? So they throw you one in return? Why spend so much money on them? So they do the same for you? Why are you friends with them if you cant talk to them? Do you just like to know in your head you have a high friend count? What is it that you cant do, that your friend has to do for you? Do you appreciate the people that are there for you when you need someone most?
Think about these things before you decide to make friends and keep them in the long run. If you cant do a person a nice gesture without thinking to yourself that you expect something in return then don't call them your friend and don't do them any favours.

I didn't throw her a big party and I never claimed to have spent a lot of money? t's not abnormal to expect a birthday card (which could be free!) from your best friend, especially one that absolutely loves birthdays and is forever asking my opinion on present and cards. If you think I'm a bad person for expecting a birthday card the goodness knows what you think of the majority of the population.

Buzzybee90

marisco wrote: »

What is odd is that you measure the strength and worth of a friendship, that you have shared with someone since your school days, against whether she sends you a bit of paper with a pretty picture on it and some sentiments.

Perhaps you're just not a very sentimental person?

marisco_2

Buzzybee90 wrote: »

Perhaps you're just not a very sentimental person?

This is true. I am led more by reason rather than emotion.

Buzzybee90

marisco wrote: »

This is true. I am led more by reason rather than emotion.

Then possibly you're not the best person to comment on something that concerns sentimentality/ emotion.

Bluebell68

Understand how you feel my oh never got me a birthday card or an anniversary card few weeks later

he is well aware what cards mean to me what words mean to me
he just did not bother
I Made him anniversary card its still in our room he has not opened or looked at it
so crap birthday crap anniversary
so I understand how you feel OP
xxx

wapow

Buzzybee90 wrote: »

I didn't throw her a big party and I never claimed to have spent a lot of money? t's not abnormal to expect a birthday card (which could be free!) from your best friend, especially one that absolutely loves birthdays and is forever asking my opinion on present and cards. If you think I'm a bad person for expecting a birthday card the goodness knows what you think of the majority of the population.

It wasn't all aimed at you Buzzy! It was something to ask yourself when you have some alone time and for others to consider aswell.

I think if the majority of the population are so hung up over birthday cards then maybe the majority of the population should make it clear before they get together with another person how important this is for them and that it could the be all end all of a relationship or maybe do a march with placards or sign a petition or something that forces a card on birthdays then youll receive a card albeit miserably. There will be no end to complaining.


One more thing - You might consider them a best friend, but what is your status to them? Do you just expect someone to think youre their best friend too because you feel this way about them?


Maybe she has a best friend and you were just a friend that shes grown up with but not a best friend?


Again Buzzy, things to ask yourself, aswell as others to ask themselves. So not directly aimed at you.

Buzzybee90

Bluebell68 wrote: »

Understand how you feel my oh never got me a birthday card or an anniversary card few weeks later

he is well aware what cards mean to me what words mean to me
he just did not bother
I Made him anniversary card its still in our room he has not opened or looked at it
so crap birthday crap anniversary
so I understand how you feel OP
xxx

That must have been awful, to me it's the fact that someone has taken the time to write you something meaningful.

wapow wrote: »

It wasn't all aimed at you Buzzy! It was something to ask yourself when you have some alone time and for others to consider aswell.

I think if the majority of the population are so hung up over birthday cards then maybe the majority of the population should make it clear before they get together with another person how important this is for them and that it could the be all end all of a relationship or maybe do a march with placards or sign a petition or something that forces a card on birthdays then youll receive a card albeit miserably. There will be no end to complaining.


One more thing - You might consider them a best friend, but what is your status to them? Do you just expect someone to think youre their best friend too because you feel this way about them?


Maybe she has a best friend and you were just a friend that shes grown up with but not a best friend?


Again Buzzy, things to ask yourself, aswell as others to ask themselves. So not directly aimed at you.

Ah, sorry! I do completely see what you mean, I think it's the fact she makes such a fuss about other people's cards that's added to the hurt. She refers to me frequently as her best friend, though we both have a life long best friend each. Best friend sounds very childish I suppose but I'm an advocate of having a small group of close friends than a large expanse of acquaintances.

In the scheme of life a birthday card is very trivial but I guess to me it just represents thoughtfulness.

wapow

I'll send you a card Buzzy
A big one with loads of glue & glitter!

Buzzybee90

wapow wrote: »

I'll send you a card Buzzy
A big one with loads of glue & glitter!

That's the best kind!