Debt Bomb shell dropped on me

patman99

I would suggest getting that SoA up for us to study.

Based on what you have revealed so far, a plan would be -

1. Reduce the £50 a month going into kids accounts to £10
2. Make him show you EVERY letter he gets from the credit card companies so that should they increase the interest rate, you can get him to write a letter to reject it (this does mean that the card becomes inactive and the debt becomes a 'loan')
3. Sort him out a cheap (£500) car and 'charge' him the £90 p/w he gets as a car allowance to use it. This will then be used to put fuel in it and pay for the Tax/MOT & Insurance.
4. Open another savings account. Into this, put any surplus from the car allowance + any surplus from the £500. At the end of the year this can be used to pay a chunk off one of the cards.

Principia_2

financialdisease wrote: »

He has just gotten the figures I posted from his credit record online I saw it for myself the only part im doubting is his £1k overdraft we have had od issues in the past, he knows how i hate overdrafts from what I see at work do has a reason to lie about it. Credit file does not show its figure.

It's not necessarily about lying, it's like when people first decide to go on a diet and get weighed and are shocked at how much they weigh. Often (but not all the time) people in debt have spent so long denying their problem that they haven't kept a proper track of their spending and are shocked by the totals owed.

Good luck and hopefully it seems he is one of the few who has kept a good handle on what he owes, probably a good sign for the future if he isn't in total denial now

financialdisease

I have been trying to complete the soa but couldn't get the form to work for me? It wouldn't allow me to add any more categories to the unsecured debs and when I pressed calculate nothing happened. I blame my ancient old lazy laptop I will try it on my phone soon. He is back from a very long day out he left at 10am this morning for the football so he isn't in the mood talk about it and I don't xo arguments so thats that for just now. I wish I had a car I would get the kids gear and drive to the Scottish mountains for some fun in the snow with the ice cold wind in my face I can forget about everything

financialdisease

Thank you so much for being here and taking the time to reply, I can't think of anyone to speak to about it irl only reasons not to tell people

My Mum and sisters would only see the horror in him keeping it from me

My best friend is in the no debt camp with me so wouldn't understand how I can be okay with him

Other friends and work mates I would be embarrassed

his Mum is such a worrier I wouldn't want to do that to her knowing there is no way she can help.

My dad will just say welcome to our world!

Jeez why am I posting all this, I was thinking of phoning a help line like breathing space or similar earlier but thought I am being stupid and someone in real need might be waiting on a phone line somewhere

eyeopener2

financialdisease wrote: »

Roughly £200 left over he reckons on a normal week he spends around £100 on pints, papers, sweets fresh bread and cakes every few days

£100 a week on pints, papers, bread and cake? You mean a month I hope.

So that's £100 to throw at the debt straight away without even chipping away at the others bits of the soa. Easy short term fix, he makes a sacrifice or three and begins to learn his lessons in money.

If it's £100 a week, then you can see where a large chunk of the debt has come from (but it isn't, is it?). £5000 a year on rubbish. That is a massive win and you can make serious in roads to the debt.

financialdisease

Nope its a week he has always openly said he thinks he spends a £100 a week I am left with about £300 a month after bills but I have no debt and spend most of it on the kids activities and days out so it never bothered me he had £400 left I didn't realise

giblet1979

It sounds like it's starting to come together, and there is money there for your husband to make payments without huge sacrifices so that is positive. Hopefully he will get on board, and you will soon feel much better about everything, and he will have learned a lesson (not meant to be harsh).

This forum is definitely a place to talk and share how you feel, as well as being great for help and advice, so please don't worry, and keep posting!

Hugs x

eyeopener2

Well then, when you have sorted out talking to national debtline or stepchange or whoever then you have a massive first cut of the budget to throw at the debt. £5000 (although it may not be thAt straightforward as other things may be lurking). He can do without beer, papers, sweets, bread and cakes for a few years while he sorts the money out.

I gave up alcohol (although that was part of my problem), magazines, sky, cds and I haven't gone back to those days as I realised I didn't need any of it.

He will also be healthier! Win, win.

You do need some proper advice though, but prepare him for forgoing all this garbage he he doesn't need. He will whine a bit, we all do when the cookie jar is shut, but you soon get used to it. Especially when the big Debt numbers start dropping.

BlushingRose

If you do need someone to chat to, step change and the other debt charities are very good at listening.

financialdisease

Congratulations on your debt free-ness eyeopener2

I think he will really struggle to rein in his spending he thinks nothing of going to the shop everyday before work and buying crips and juice for the office or bringing a a take away or new dvds or books for the kids. He buys around 3/4 newspapers a day I find that crazy since its the same news! The drinking is weird he can be out all day Iike today he never gets drunk only drinks pints of lager says he paces himself how can he spend a fortune if thats the case? I don't drink at all, I really dislike pubs. Today was all free he was at hospitality paid by someone else.