Who is the Breadwinner?

onlyroz

lazer wrote: »

I think it does matter actually, and it is preferable for the husband to be the breadwinner if the couple want children. .

Why? Do you think men are incapable of looking after children?

LandyAndy

onlyroz wrote: »

Why? Do you think men are incapable of looking after children?

Exactly. My wife has worked away all week for most weeks in the last three years. Ok, my kids are teenagers but we seemed to cope perfectly well.:cool:

quidsy

I've always earned more than my husband but he isn't bothered by it, he pays me half his salary & keeps half to help out his mum & his own personal spending. I pay all the bills, holidays etc. He does most of the childcare as one of the benefits of earning less is working flexi hours & finishing at 3.30pm.

He "could" earn more in his true calling , still not as much as me but is happy to do a manual low paid job as it fits with our family & benefits our childs well being. He puts our needs above his own & we are grateful for it.

The problem I find with men earning less or not at all is if they feel they are put on "pocket money". Too much ego damage.

neverdespairgirl

I asked my dearly beloved last night if it would bother me if I earned a lot more than him (we're fairly similar at the moment) and he looked as me as if I'd lost the plot and said, "why would I mind?"

Which was roughly my line of thought, too.

lazer

onlyroz wrote: »

Why? Do you think men are incapable of looking after children?

Did you actually read my message - I said we can't afford the maternity leave - which the woman has to take (Although the man can now take the last 26 weeks, but only the mother can take the first 26 weeks)

Of course men are capable of looking after children, but they can't give birth to them.

Gra76

I earn more per working week as I do more hours, but she gets paid more per hour than I do. So tempted to get out of the private sector and into the public one!

j-josie

DH earned more than me when the children were small. Then he was made redundant, I got promotion and went full time. My salary is now nearly double his but he is no longer stressed out & commuting and I really enjoy my new role. But neither of us could manage without the other's income and it all goes into the one household 'pot' so it's not really an issue

ViolaLass

I'm the breadwinner and pregnant. OH is self employed with erratic income but he's my lottery ticket - supporting him might pay off and if it doesn't (financially) I'll have had a lot of cuddles and giggles along the way.

balletshoes

lazer wrote: »

Did you actually read my message - I said we can't afford the maternity leave - which the woman has to take (Although the man can now take the last 26 weeks, but only the mother can take the first 26 weeks)

Of course men are capable of looking after children, but they can't give birth to them.

its not compulsory to take 26 weeks maternity leave, is it?

in answer to the OP - at the moment my OH is the main breadwinner, although my salary is the one which is stable and secure, his isn't. Over the years we've been together, sometimes I have been the main breadwinner, sometimes he has been. I'm a mum who works, I need adult conversation and I enjoy my workplace environment. Luckily my employer has really good work/life balance policies, and I've been able to use them all the time I've been a mum.

trailingspouse

My husband earns exactly the same as me. To the penny. So no, I won't be voting.