Frugal Frump to Fab - The Journey Continues

Rummer

Which As the others have said I think we all feel that way to a degree and making changes is scary. That is why I really value this thread as it supports changes one step at a time.

I have had a good day today with the healthy eating progressing well also been keeping up with the hand cream and my exercise outfit is ready to go tomorrow

lizzie157

Thanks for the birthday wishes, in the end it was a lovely day. I was thoroughly spoilt with lots of presents and a weekend away booked for me and family by DS2. I am taking parents out later in week for a mooch at a garden centre and a coffee. Had lots of compliments about not looking half a century:rotfl: so must be doing something right.:rotfl::rotfl:

maddiemay you're right it really should have been my parents asking me and that's something I still have to work on putting myself first for a change as DD1 told me 'it should be your time now mum.'

Whichwhy

I've been having a word with myself, trying to break the negatives habits grown over the years ... "I can't do that because ..." That type of thing

This sounds like me when I first joined here and I would recommend 'Feel the fear..' it helped me a lot (reminds me must re-read it) I'm still not fully where i want to be as you may have read with the birthday worries but I'm getting there. I definitely do things I wouldn't have done a couple of years ago.
I go on holiday for the first time in 20 years in July this year , I'm feeling sick thinking about it .
It's a family wedding and I love the bride dearly I hate to have upset her with an excuse .
Basically I work ft come home and stay home only visiting my DD & DGS at the weekends
I live with my cat and ferret
So I feel I have no confidence to be around people all the time being used to my own company most of the time.

I still have self esteem issues, I've spoken to a couple of friends about it and found actually they feel the same. I've worked on this using groupon to pamper myself a bit and joining a yoga class. Yoga class is invaluable as our instructor is fab and is always telling us how beautiful we all are. :T

I have this invisible wall that I created decades ago that I in effect have closed myself off to social things , think that this developed when my marriage ended
I wish everyone well , I'm the one the turn to when things go wrong my best freind describes me as nanny macphee in that I'm always around when things are bad , sorts it and disappear when it okay
I haven't met up with her in such along time , I feel guilty since my mum passed that suddenly I have time.
I worry about things I can't control see the worse case in everything
I get so far in learning to drive , then I think I can't do this , same with weight loss , same with job promotions .
Even personal standards like looking after my self, having my roots done, sorting facial hair that sort of thing so this thread is proving invaluable to me
I try to paint this confident picture but I want to be the real me just don't know how

A lot of this also could be me i have only a few friends, stopped seeing one as she made me feel bad about myself and had no empathy for me, despite me being there for her when she needed me. I forced myself to say yes when perhaps I would rather have stayed at home, I also started to say do you want to go .... and not feel as though it was personal if they couldn't make it/said no. I'm still a work in progress but I AM getting better at it and will keep at it as Maddiemay says 'we are so worth it.:)

I'm off to into town later for a mooch round, will buy myself a small treat with my birthday money. The rest I need to think about what I want to do with -am not rushing in to anything.

Enjoy your day everyone.

pirateyqueen

Had a naughty weekend this weekend in terms of food and not going to the gym (in my defence, my local gym closes at 4pm on the weekends and as I was busy both days by the time I was able to go it was shut!) but I bought a few new clothing items including a lovely dress for summer and a blazer in attempts to smarten myself up a bit. I've also ordered a book on Parisian fashion which I'm really looking forward to reading. I also did a coconut oil treatment on my hair last night so it's looking pretty good today. Now if I can only get to the gym at lunch...

maman

whichwhydoIturn wrote: »

I try to paint this confident picture but I want to be the real me just don't know how after years of being in the shadow
Thank you for reading
XX

I think we're all like that to an extent. You've certainly come to the right place. Build on what you've done so far: call/text your friend, or go out and get some fresh air. Do some window shopping/try on some new clothes/mooch around the charity shops. Try and get out of that rut of doing nothing outside work.


I had a bit of a pamper session today: deep condition on my hair and defuzz. I've got dressed up (dress rather than jeans;)) and I'll do my make up before going out in a bit.


I've got lazy with slathering after my shower so have bought Nivea in-shower moisturiser. I'll report back if it works.


It's 5 weeks to my sunshine holiday so planning to go into city and look for a few things (mainly sundresses for day and evening) tomorrow.


Back soon.

sweetcheeks33

Hello all,

I have also been very lazy with moisturising. Got really down with levels of spots and the treatment I'm on not working. I think it's starting to work now so fingers crossed. Mood will start to lift again.

I also bought Nivea in shower... Great thin liners and all manman!!

Oh is back shift this week and giving me a chance to catch up on me.. So tonight I have come home from work and had a nap lol.. 4 hours later!! It was needed sleep tho so I feel much better:)

Just wearing jeans and t- shirts again so need to get out of this habit and back to looking better and making more effort.

Healthy eating going betterish although had a few bits of chocolate and biscuits today!!

Now best get up and get washing in--- oops!!

sweetcheeks33

Well..... 12.40 AM and I'm still awake with throbbing head, with OH is snoring... I don't think the nap was such a great idea now...

Off for a wee decaf tea to hopefully send me off again.

lessonlearned

That's the problem with "naps". Sleep for too long and you're awake half the night!!!

Well now - I look and feel dreadful.

Took OH to see his consultant. We had "the conversation". To use some horse racing analogies - we are not quite on the final furlong yet but we are now definitely on the home straight.

Timescales?? Months not years.

I knew of course but even so having it spelt out by the consultant was still a body blow. OH knows and I've told the family - not mum yet though. TBH I doubt that she would fully understand. I feel that I've lost her too because although she is still with us the dementia is really taking a hold. We can't really have proper conversations any more.

I have my boys and my sister and my best friend to talk to and of course my virtual friends here. The senior nurses at OH's home are all very kind and supportive too. We can choose a hospice or he can remain at the home. I think we will stay at the home because they can provide appropriate end of life care. I can come and go at will and they can provide a bed for me when the time comes.

Lovely day here - will try and get my act together and meet up with my friend for a coffee. She lost her mum this week too.

Sorry if this post is rather downbeat. I'm ok just very very tired. Will take it easy for a while.

Bye for now.

Floss

Huge hug for all of you LL

Kiwisaver_2

It must be incredibly hard for you LL, make sure you take some time out to look after yourself too.


There's not been much fabulising going on here as I've had sinus infection, tired and eating poorly as a consequence.

maman

I'm glad you know your virtual friends are here for you LL.


Sometimes it's easier to 'talk' on here than to those closest to us.


Have a lovely time with your friend, enjoy the sunshine and try to look after YOURSELF!!:A