Neighbour problems

CH27

Morrismorris wrote: »

And you have no idea, if we are going to be picky neither of us know what this boys condition is or how it affects him or his family.

I am however affected by the noise as are my family. You have simply chosen to mount your white horse and come to the neighbours rescue all in the sole purpose of.?

As I said, fence and large trees seem to be the way forward.

Because having disabled family members it's piddles me off beyond belief when people judge how we look after without knowing anything about them.

Mojisola

Morrismorris wrote: »

As I said, fence and large trees seem to be the way forward.

You can get special fencing which helps reduce traffic noise. I don't know if it would help in this situation but worth asking about.

Tiddlywinks

Opinion is a judgement as it is based on personal values.

You think the child is deprived of fun because he is in a yard for 4/5 hours a day... You are basing that on your version of 'normal' but your neighbour has a son with a different 'normal' which may well be perfect for his needs.

I do understand how disappointing this must be for you.

You talk about this being your dream home... You want it to be perfect. Unfortunately, you can't control neighbours. It could have been BBQs til the early hours, or triplet girls squealing on a trampoline for hours, or teenagers playing football and using some choice language... That's the price we pay for living close to other people.

All you can do is make your garden as private as possible and explain to your children that everyone is different and that the neighbour's son plays in a different way.

Morrismorris

Mojisola wrote: »

You can get noise-reducing fencing which works if you live beside a busy road. I don't know if it would help in this situation but worth asking about.

Will ask when the company come out tomorrow. To be fair it is a rubbish fence so maybe a new higher one will muffle the sound a little.

Morrismorris

Tiddlywinks wrote: »

Opinion is a judgement as it is based on personal values.

You think the child is deprived of fun because he is in a yard for 4/5 hours a day... You are basing that on your version of 'normal' but your neighbour has a son with a different 'normal' which may well be perfect for his needs.

I do understand how disappointing this must be for you.

You talk about this being your dream home... You want it to be perfect. Unfortunately, you can't control neighbours. It could have been BBQs til the early hours, or triplet girls squealing on a trampoline for hours, or teenagers playing football and using some choice language... That's the price we pay for living close to other people.

All you can do is make your garden as private as possible and explain to your children that everyone is different and that the neighbour's son plays in a different way.

I have explained to my kids, the oldest two understand perfectly and talk to him etc, it's just my youngest. Having three kids I doubt my garden is going to be quiet either, it's just the constant shouting and then banging on the windows. It grates after a while ( yes I know worse for his parents)

Maybe I should just put up and shut up. Hopefully the new fence will work

Leothecat

OP, that's a very difficult situation and one I understand as I had a similar problem. I ended up moving house over it.....after putting up a fence which made no difference to the situation. Also, working with children with learning disabilities I also understand the difficulties the parents of this child face.
I think your first port of call would be the fence and shrubs/trees and if this does not work, a very delicate word with the parents. However, if you say that they leave the child for hours on end without interacting with him, I can't see how interested they will be if you do speak to them.
Good luck!

Vicky123

Morrismorris wrote: »

I appreciate that, and she would have had no difficulties from the neighbours previously, they were the nicest couple and got on with everyone.

I have no clue what it must be like to live with 24 hours, but that doesn't mean I can't enjoy my own property. I know that sounds mean but it's unbearable. And it can't be much fun for their son being outside for 4/5 hours at a time, in a concrete yard with a swing.

You can't possibly know she had no problems with the previous neighbours just because they got on with everyone else.

Morrismorris

Vicky123 wrote: »

You can't possibly know she had no problems with the previous neighbours just because they got on with everyone else.

Ok. No I can't. However, she doesn't know me, I have just moved in. I had a horrible neighbour when I bought my first house, I don't judge every other neighbour I get based on that experience

Another one looking for things in my posts that are not there.

mummyroysof3

I have a son with a disability and he does similar noise making. I would not have a problem if a neighbour approached me in a good way about it. I guess the difference is that he isn't out their alone ever and when I feel that he is making too much noise we go inside. Not sure I can be of any help tbh but at least find out if you can speak to parent as it could be you talking to him that gets him excited so its best to ask

Mojisola

Morrismorris wrote: »

I have explained to my kids, the oldest two understand perfectly and talk to him etc, it's just my youngest. Having three kids I doubt my garden is going to be quiet either, it's just the constant shouting and then banging on the windows. It grates after a while ( yes I know worse for his parents)

Maybe I should just put up and shut up. Hopefully the new fence will work

It's a difficult situation for you. You can sort out some physical barriers - fence and/or tall shrubs, maybe even a removable garden sail which you can put up so he can't see you when he is upstairs - but you also have to learn not to focus on the noise.

When something is annoying or upsetting, we become more sensitive to it - it's important to let it slip into the background.

Any reasonable person will make allowances for someone with a disability but I would also expect the parents of a child with a disability to intervene if he is constantly calling out.