"i dont know why they pay you"

tir21

you responded in kind

I felt I had to say something. Aren't you supposed to stand up to a bulley? I should have chosen my words better but that's easy with hindsight. Is a very unusual thing for a colleague to say. No one's ever said such a thing in my previous 20 years of
employment

Look, seriously, grow up a little.

I really don't think I've behaved in any way that can be described as immature

At the moment there isn't enough wrong doing for a grievance

So if an employee looks at their boss in disgust and looks them up and down shaking their head and says I don't know why you get paid- you don't think there would be any repercussions?

tir21

jaydeeuk1 wrote: »

Was your fly undone and nob hanging out?

No. If it had she wouldn't have loooked me up and down. She would have just looked down.. and kept looking

tir21

Bantex wrote: »

Why do you think this person is "picking" on you?

No idea. But I suppose a meeting could get to the bottom of it

Bantex_2

tir21 wrote: »

No idea. But I suppose a meeting could get to the bottom of it

Or just ask them?

This is the grown up world, not a school playground where teacher is expected to sort out any minor spats.

tir21

Bantex wrote: »

Or just ask them?

Could easily degenerate if she feels Im complaining about something when she hasn't done anything wrong.

There is a chance she won't take anything I say seriously without supervisor present. With the disdain she demonstrated last night I dont see any reason to think she would be constructive

This is the grown up world, not a school playground where teacher is expected to sort out any minor spats.

No but it may better to have some mediator present

BillJones

tir21 wrote: »

Its not a matter of survival but a question of how we can reasonably expect to be treated by coworkers

You cannot reasonably expect them all to be lovely, and this one has been unlovely in a way that they know cannot be proven.

In terms of advice, trying to use official channels to stop someone being a bit unpleasant is lunacy. To echo the phrase above, this is a bit like running to the teacher in the playground because someone was nasty to you.

It'd be great if everyone at work was reasonable, and pleasant, but that's a rare situation. Accept that this person is not nice, and move on.

tir21

BillJones wrote: »

You cannot reasonably expect them all to be lovely, and this one has been unlovely in a way that they know cannot be proven.

In terms of advice, trying to use official channels to stop someone being a bit unpleasant is lunacy. To echo the phrase above, this is a bit like running to the teacher in the playground because someone was nasty to you.

It'd be great if everyone at work was reasonable, and pleasant, but that's a rare situation. Accept that this person is not nice, and move on.

Buy why should anyone alter their behaviour if they know it will never be complained about

DKLS

Bantex wrote: »

Or just ask them?

This is the grown up world, not a school playground where teacher is expected to sort out any minor spats.

This +1, am sure the manager is just itching to sort out this issue.

Op behave professionally: either keep it professional or speak to your colleague and get it resolved.

tir21

I cant see any conversation I have with my colleague about this issue ending well

adouglasmhor

tir21 wrote: »

I cant see any conversation I have with my colleague about this issue ending well

Well don't have one. Ignore her, she already knows she has got you rattled and this is giving her a feeling of power over you. stop giving her power.