Bulying on school bus

teawithmilk

Just had a text message from my DD (11yrs) who is on the school bus. She said that 2 girls on the bus have been calling her names- this has been going on for ages to be honest but it seems to be escalating. Apparently this week they have said that (apologies for the vile language) she is a b*tch, said that she has special needs, called her !!!!!!, and gay becuase she doesnt know who the "popular" people are in school and becuase she doesnt have an instagram account.

I have the number of one of the mums of these girls who i know vaguely (DD went round to this girls house once) i feel so angry that I feel like sending my DDs plaintive text to me directly to her and say "this is what your daughter is saying to mine" but they would probably not believe my DD.

Any advice please?? I want my daughter to stick up for herself and i know there is always some rough and tumble on school buses but this stuff is horrible. And she is on her own, they are ganging up on her.

Horace

Have a word with the school, they have a duty of care until your daughter gets home and that duty of car extends to the school bus.

Mojisola

teawithmilk wrote: »

Apparently this week they have said that (apologies for the vile language) she is a b*tch, said that she has special needs, called her !!!!!!, and gay becuase she doesnt know who the "popular" people are in school and becuase she doesnt have an instagram account.

they would probably not believe my DD.

Start with the school.

In the meantime, could your daughter record the bullying? Either a digi-recorder or on her phone?

nickcc

Teachers at one of our local Schools were happy once the Children had boarded the School Bus as they believed that was the end of their responsibilities. Damage caused to the Bus and pupils, ripped seats, graffiti, cannabis smoking etc was considered to be of no concern to the School as the Children were no longer on School premises. One of our Drivers a few years ago was blinded in his left eye due to one of the pupils spraying an aerosol of christmas snow in his face, the Driver lost his job as he could no longer drive a PCV and the School denied all responsibility. Although the Driver attempted to claim against the School and the Bus company the advice he received from all of the ambulance chasing claim firms was that his claim would almost certainly fail.

Morglin

teawithmilk wrote: »

Just had a text message from my DD (11yrs) who is on the school bus. She said that 2 girls on the bus have been calling her names- this has been going on for ages to be honest but it seems to be escalating. Apparently this week they have said that (apologies for the vile language) she is a b*tch, said that she has special needs, called her !!!!!!, and gay becuase she doesnt know who the "popular" people are in school and becuase she doesnt have an instagram account.

I have the number of one of the mums of these girls who i know vaguely (DD went round to this girls house once) i feel so angry that I feel like sending my DDs plaintive text to me directly to her and say "this is what your daughter is saying to mine" but they would probably not believe my DD.

Any advice please?? I want my daughter to stick up for herself and i know there is always some rough and tumble on school buses but this stuff is horrible. And she is on her own, they are ganging up on her.

Personally, I would teach her to defend herself, verbally, and then stay out of it - a bit of verbal is part and parcel of school life, I'm afraid, and you cannot protect kids from everything.

Parents getting involved tends to escalate things out of all proportion.

Anything physical, obviously, would be a different thing.

Lin

susancs

Horace wrote: »

Have a word with the school, they have a duty of care until your daughter gets home and that duty of car extends to the school bus.

Totally agree with this. I would ring the school ASAP. In my girls's secondary school the Deputy Head deals with any school bus issues. Children who misbehave on school buses are disciplined by the school.

sassyblue

It's a pity you couldn't go on the bus with her morning and evening but make sure you sit next to one of the bullies each time.

You wouldn't have to say a word.

mrcow

As a mother, I'd be tempted to text the mother right now and tell them what's being said. And tell them that you are forwarding the headteacher details of everything. And then call the school for good measure.

As a teacher, i would recommend that you give the school a chance first. Call them now (it's only 4.30) and tell them what's going on. If no joy, call them first thing Monday. And give them a chance to sort it out.

If that doesn't work, contact the head directly and get it dealt with.

Some 11 year olds can be really vile at times.

DomRavioli

As far as I'm aware, the school doesn't have jurisdiction over the buses. Why not teach your daughter resilience, and how to deal with people who behave like animals? Ignorance really is the best policy with any bully, if they don't get a rise out of the person they are bullying, it isn't fun for them anymore.

Has there been any physical violence between the bullies and your child (There's nothing in the OP to suggest there has)?

I had this a long time ago when I was in high school, and if she ignores them long enough, they will go away and find someone else to do it to - I know its not a solution as such because it is just moving the problem, but your daughter seems unable to cope with it - Maybe get her some wax earplugs (amazon) so she doesn't hear it?

susancs

nickcc wrote: »

Teachers at one of our local Schools were happy once the Children had boarded the School Bus as they believed that was the end of their responsibilities. Damage caused to the Bus and pupils, ripped seats, graffiti, cannabis smoking etc was considered to be of no concern to the School as the Children were no longer on School premises. One of our Drivers a few years ago was blinded in his left eye due to one of the pupils spraying an aerosol of christmas snow in his face, the Driver lost his job as he could no longer drive a PCV and the School denied all responsibility. Although the Driver attempted to claim against the School and the Bus company the advice he received from all of the ambulance chasing claim firms was that his claim would almost certainly fail.

The school were actually not adhering to statutory requirements when they belived that their responsibilities ended at the end of the school day as the DFE publication "Preventing and tackling bullying" (2012) states:

"There are a number of statutory obligations on schools with regard to behaviour which establish clear responsibilities to respond to bullying. In particular section 89 of the Education and Inspections Act 2006:


Provides that every school must have measures to encourage good behaviour and [FONT=Arial,Arial][FONT=Arial,Arial]prevent all forms of bullying [/FONT][/FONT]amongst pupils. These measures should be part of the school’s behaviour policy which must be communicated to all pupils, school staff and parents;
Gives head teachers the ability to discipline pupils for poor behaviour that occurs even when the pupil is not on school premises or under the lawful control of school staff."
http://webarchive.nationalarchives.gov.uk/20130401151715/https://www.education.gov.uk/publications/eOrderingDownload/preventing%20and%20tackling%20bullying.pdf

The school should take OPs report seriously.

teawithmilk

This has been going on since September. She is a strong girl and has tried to just ignore them or laugh off their comments but there are at least 2 of them (sometimes a boy joins in)

I know what you mean about putting up with it, standing up for yourself etc. I have always taught her not to be a cry baby but it seems to be escalating. She shouldn't end up in tears surely???

If they are like this in yr7 what will it be like as she goes up the school???

Plus one of the girls has picked on my DD in the past so there is a bit of "history" there...she just never gives up trying to torment my DD and put her down.

Tried to phone the school office but they shut at 3.30pm on an Friday. In the longer term I could get her to swop bus (like from next September) but why should she have to??? it would mean her walking a long distance to another bus stop....and then they would think they had won anyway. If that's the last resort then fine but wondered if there was anything i could do in the meantime.

I just know this is going to end up an awful mess. Why do some children have to be so horrible to others???? She said one of the sixth formers asked if she was OK but no one else helped her.