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Ex Partner wanting Parental Responsibility 10 years after split

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  • peachyprice
    peachyprice Posts: 22,346 Forumite
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    Kayalana99 wrote: »
    It does give him rights to say if she can leave the country tho does it not? So he could stop her having holidays out of spite if say she didn't want to stay for xmas.

    You're supposed to get permission form the other parent regardless of whether or not they have PR, are divorced, married, etc.,

    In theory he could stop her having holidays out of the country, but he would have to go to court and have a good reason.

    It's not as simple as him saying she can't go, unless it went to court and the child were put on a no-fly list due to risk of kidnap there's no way airport officials can check whether permission has been given or not.

    Even turning up at the airport signed by a parent who isn't travelling is a farce as they have no way of checking whether the letter was actually written by the parent at all.
    Accept your past without regret, handle your present with confidence and face your future without fear
  • Kayalana99
    Kayalana99 Posts: 3,626 Forumite
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    edited 13 February 2014 at 10:14AM
    You're supposed to get permission form the other parent regardless of whether or not they have PR, are divorced, married, etc.,

    That seems abit mad isn't that the point of PR? What about a parent that has had no contact with the child?

    Surely thats not the legal view that if you were to take the child to spain etc you'd have to hunt down the birth father. :/

    Edit:

    If the mother alone has parental responsibility and there are no residence orders concerning the child, permission is not strictly needed by her to take a child abroad on holiday. However, again it is responsible parenting to consult and reach agreement with the other parent. Of course this does not stop a father without parental responsibility applying for parental responsibility and then objecting to the temporary removal of the child.
    People don't know what they want until you show them.
  • barbiedoll
    barbiedoll Posts: 5,328 Forumite
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    Call me an old cynic but isn't your daughter just about the right age to be babysitting?

    Maybe that's why they are suddenly so keen to have her visiting for half of the school holidays?
    "I may be many things but not being indiscreet isn't one of them"
  • Mojisola
    Mojisola Posts: 35,571 Forumite
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    If he got PR and you died, would he be able to take your daughter away from her step-dad and sibling to live with him and his new wife?
  • Person_one
    Person_one Posts: 28,884 Forumite
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    Mojisola wrote: »
    If he got PR and you died, would he be able to take your daughter away from her step-dad and sibling to live with him and his new wife?

    Very good question.

    OP, has your husband adopted your daughter, is this what you mean when you say he has PR?

    If not, that might be something to look into sooner rather than later if she sees him as her dad and would want to stay with him should anything happen to you. If your ex gets PR, I don't think this would be a possibility anymore.
  • Hi OP, I know a couple of people have said on here that nothing can be enforced if your daughter doesn't want to go at her age but I wouldn't necessarily take this as a given. I was 12 when my mother and father split and the judge involved in our case forced me to go to my father's every other weekend even though I didn't want to. I used to cry all the way there. I'm 24 now, so I don't know if things have changed in the last 12 years, but it wasn't until I was 14 that they stopped forcing me to go.
    First home purchased 09/08/2013
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  • Poppie68
    Poppie68 Posts: 4,881 Forumite
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    Mojisola wrote: »
    If he got PR and you died, would he be able to take your daughter away from her step-dad and sibling to live with him and his new wife?




    Should the mother die and has appointed a guardian (generally in a will) the guardian will automatically acquire parental responsibility if the father doesn’t have parental responsibility (and if the mother has a sole residence order the appointment of her guardian will stand, whether or not the father has parental responsibility).
  • peachyprice
    peachyprice Posts: 22,346 Forumite
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    Person_one wrote: »
    Very good question.

    OP, has your husband adopted your daughter, is this what you mean when you say he has PR?

    If not, that might be something to look into sooner rather than later if she sees him as her dad and would want to stay with him should anything happen to you. If your ex gets PR, I don't think this would be a possibility anymore.

    The ex having PR doesn't take away from OP's husband having PR, they would both have it, I can't see any court taking a child away from a step father with PR that the child has lived with most of her life to live with a father with PR who she's had little contact with and has only had PR for a short time.
    Accept your past without regret, handle your present with confidence and face your future without fear
  • peachyprice
    peachyprice Posts: 22,346 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    pops5588 wrote: »
    Hi OP, I know a couple of people have said on here that nothing can be enforced if your daughter doesn't want to go at her age but I wouldn't necessarily take this as a given. I was 12 when my mother and father split and the judge involved in our case forced me to go to my father's every other weekend even though I didn't want to. I used to cry all the way there. I'm 24 now, so I don't know if things have changed in the last 12 years, but it wasn't until I was 14 that they stopped forcing me to go.

    Didn't your mother tell the judge that you wanted your feelings taken into consideration?
    Accept your past without regret, handle your present with confidence and face your future without fear
  • Person_one
    Person_one Posts: 28,884 Forumite
    Tenth Anniversary 10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    The ex having PR doesn't take away from OP's husband having PR, they would both have it, I can't see any court taking a child away from a step father with PR that the child has lived with most of her life to live with a father with PR who she's had little contact with and has only had PR for a short time.

    But if he doesn't formally have PR at the moment (which isn't clear) then if the ex gets it first, he could prevent it happening, couldn't he?

    If the husband has legal PR now, that's ok.
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