ASD / Aspergers Support Thread Part II

Indie_Kid

On the request of Alwaysonthego, I've started a new thread.

A bit of background about my situation:
I always knew I was "different" but thought nothing of it. I have a friend who is an Autistic adult who once claimed that I may have it and I just brushed it off.

That was 2003 when we first met. Fast forward to 2010. At the time, I had severe depression and he suggested it again; but was never when asked, able to explain why he said this. (He does this a lot)

Anyway, some other people suggested it, (it's somewhat embarrassng when a stranger asks you and you don't know what to say) and I finally got a diagnosis on May 10th 2012.

This has caused me a lot of problems - I've had people who work with disabled people either tell me I can't possibly have Autism and then come out with some silly reason about how their relative may have it and I'm nothing like them. That relative is a man. I am a female and we're meant to be different and of course, it's a spectrum. I had another person who works with disabled people tell me it's not that bad and no, she won't be making reasonable adjustments. Ok then, I'll just have a meltdown in the office in front of everyone because it's getting too noisy (this can be physically painful) and I am slowly becoming aggigated. Thankfully, that never actually happened; but it was close.

Needless to say, the 2 GPs I saw over this issue, weren't happy and were both willing, if asked, to write a letter regarding my situation.

Due to the above, I am not in education or employment, nor am I receiving the help I need to live independently from social services. Thankfully, there was no battle for me to get ESA. I was very shocked at how easy it appeared for me to get ESA. I was then informed by my "support worker" that I must get a job, despite DWP / ATOS telling me I'm in the support group. How I'm going to get a job in my current state, I don't know.

Are there any Autistic adults here, or are most of you parents of Autistic children?

psstoverere

I suspect my 21 year old son has Aspergers and our doctor agreed he may have mild Aspergers but has no idea where to send him for diagnosis, i phoned the dr.s after 3 weeks to find out if there had been any progress but she still was unsure of where to refer him. Any ideas on what i can do now? she said she has not had to refer an adult before.

Indie_Kid

psstoverere wrote: »

I suspect my 21 year old son has Aspergers and our doctor agreed he may have mild Aspergers but has no idea where to send him for diagnosis, i phoned the dr.s after 3 weeks to find out if there had been any progress but she still was unsure of where to refer him. Any ideas on what i can do now? she said she has not had to refer an adult before.

I was referred to CMHT. (Community Mental Health Team)

The old thread is here

psstoverere

Thank you i did have a flick through the old thread but it is so long i got a bit lost...i will ring next week and suggest this if she has still not done anything

Indie_Kid

No problem.

If he's under a psychiatrist for depression, etc. (people on the spectrum do tend to have depression and I was diagnosed with it twice, as well as OCD) he can ask for an assessment from them.

psstoverere

He's not seeing anybody, i did think for a long time he was suffering with depression but he said he wasn't, we have just muddled along for years and years not knowing what was wrong, i feel terribly guilty for not realising sooner and for nagging and shouting all these years at him for things i now know he couldn't help

ivfmummy

Don't forget it's world Autism Day on Wednesday 2nd April. Wear something blue and spread awareness.


Indie Kid - I am a parent of a child with autism although my partner is on the spectrum too. Good luck xx

VJsmum

I think my nearly 18 year old daughter may have mild Aspergers.

I am waiting until after her A levels before I broach it with her. I think it is only fair to make her aware, as she finds many social situations very difficult. E.G lights and noise of nightclubs "confuse me". She can be very physically awkward, and can panic in crowded places. She knows she is different to other late teens. I think an awareness of what it might be will help her to learn techniques to deal with these things

Indie_Kid

ivfmummy wrote: »

Don't forget it's world Autism Day on Wednesday 2nd April. Wear something blue and spread awareness.

Isn't there also World Autism Month in April?

Indie Kid - I am a parent of a child with autism although my partner is on the spectrum too. Good luck xx

Thanks.

Own_My_Own

My 20 year old ds has Aspergers. He was diagnosed at 16 after he tried to smash his own head in on the kitchen wall.
I had taken him to the doctors many times as a child but was ignored.

I think my 16 year old dd finds it the hardest, as I let things go with him that I don't with her. Had he had been diagnosed as a child and she had been bought up with having an brother with ASD it would be different. But suddenly over night was a bit much for her. It has been 4 years and she still says ' you don't make ** do that !'

It can be tiring, but then I remember16 is a rough age to be anyway, without thinking you are always being picked on to do everything.

You learn to pick your battles when dealing with a person with ASD. Making him do things I expect her to do, just isn't worth it. I am sure as she gets older she will see that.

Woolwich_Kim

Can I ask, how do you get diagnosed as an adult? Do you go to the gp and they diagnose you there and then?

I have in the past worked as a PA to a SEN and SALT teacher (special educational needs & speech and language therapist). As the SEN teacher was often out on school visits, I spent a lot more time with the SALT. My employment there was from Jan 2010 to xmas 2012.

The SALT once said to me in all seriousness that she felt I was autistic. She thought this because she had noticed when I speak with clients or about people in my family/friends, I showed no compassion, sympathy or emotion. She believed this affected my ability to do the job in facing clients although she did think I was brilliant in doing the administrative work (writing letters, compiling data, finances etc). I took no notice of this, because she knew nothing about my family life and besides, I was only there to do a job. Infact, I was actually offended.

I work somewhere else now, in a job that deals with broken families (I still only do admin) but one of my colleagues is as a child psychologist. She recently said to me she felt I had Aspergers. Her reasons were that she felt I lacked 'emotional intelligence'. When I told her another specialist said same thing to me, she thought I should therefore take heed.

I don't believe I lack emotional intelligence just because I don't go round feeling sorry for people all the time. In my line of work I see stupid parents unable to take care of the child they have yet go on to have more and more. Those people don't deserve sympathy and I don't think I'm autistic for just saying so.

Like the OP, I always felt 'different', I have always struggled to socialise and don't have any life long friends to be honest. I like being by myself and take my lunch break at times where I know I'll be able to sit alone. However, I was an only child and neglected by parents. Of course someone who was brought up alone will struggle to socialise. I think sometimes labelling someone just discourages individuality.