The Trials & Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

tea_lover

Flaming corrie, yet another mc story.

codemonkey

tea_lover wrote: »

Flaming corrie, yet another mc story.

It's their go-to storyline. That and "oops I shogged someone I shouldn't have, and now I'm pregnant and I find out a week later". I wish one would do a proper infertility storyline. Not a crazy lady can't have a baby so goes crazy and steals one, not an infertility story that magically gets resolved after a few days, not a "miracle" storyline (like in Eastenders - Alfie has such a low sperm count that he can't impregnate Kat over years of trying or Roxie then suddenly he's back with Kat and she's pregnant immediately with twins). But a proper, long storyline showing how heartbreaking it is, and what you go through during treatment and maybe no happy "miracle" ending.

isla_red

^ THIS!

It needs to happen, it's such a silent issue.

tea_lover

Exactly. I'm not going to steal a baby, I'm not going to stick a cushion up my jumper and pretend I'm pregnant to my husband, I'm not going to adopt within a matter of weeks, it's all so ridiculous.

It also really annoys me that every mc on TV is some big shouty affair with emergency trips to hospital. Some are like that, granted. But lots are just a slow realisation at home, followed by a weekend of cramps, crying and eating too much ice cream. I swear this is part of the reason my OH still doesn't 100% believe there even was a mc....I wasn't doubled over screaming in an ambulance so to him it didn't happen.

skaps

I agree tea lover.

It needs to be talked about so that more people are aware of all the crap and heartache.

Was following the sperm vs egg plan and made such that I had bd on the days recommended, it was tiring but did it and then AF comes. Great! This whole thing is turning me into a bitter person and I feel so fed up with it all.

picklekin

Hello again lovely ladies, I'm back, relaxed and even a bit tanned

Had a wonderful holiday, except one moment when I was wearing a dress that isn't to flattering (it makes my tummy stick out) and some twatty photographer who was trying to make money said "bebe??" and pointed at me I had to run to my room and have a bit of cry, so I'm not only a not pregnant but now someone thinks I'm fat.

No news from me, need to get around to make an appt with FS to start IVF though.

vesper

Floaty wrote: »

Vesper, I'm also waiting for a July appointment (31st). The waiting is so infuriating isn't it. I haven't found a wya of coping yet, just trying to enjoy life as much as I can. I'm terrified of waking up in 15 years, with no children, and feeling like I wasted my 30s and 40s being miserable
cycle?

I feel so scared that I am the end of the family line as well. All I want in my life is a child, each day passes and it feels like something is missing, nothing I do ever fills that gap.


Doesn't help that my OH is the only child in his generation, there's no one else to carry on the family line, no siblings and no cousins on his father's side.
There are 4 of us in my generation, my sister hasn't got a maternal bone in her body, and is very career and personal life orientated, ie she doesn't want children. My cousins are in their 40's and have never had girlfriends and have said they don't want children either.


Makes it a little hard when I see my aunt, she so much wants children in the family and isn't shy about saying so. She knows we are trying but we have never said any more than that.


In better news the weight loss at the moment is going surprisingly well. Trying to get down to 30bmi is a great incentive.

Part_Mouse

Pickle sounds like you had a nic tie bar the thoughtless comment.i have to say I'm looking rather blated since trigger and iui.

I to a very aware that were a very small family dh is an only child and my brother won't be having kids so unless we can somehow have a baby then there won't be anymore of 'us'.

I tested out the trigger so bfn, a week post iui I'm not sure i feel any different this time and still a week till test, wasn't given an otd at the hosp.

codemonkey

Pickle, that happened to me a while ago. I was working with a colleague with the same first name and she was pregnant with her third child in as many years - honestly, she'd come back to work after maternity leave and after a few months she'd be pregnant again (very difficult to deal with if you're unsuccessfully trying and she's complaining that it's a disaster that she's pregnant again. Anyway the occupational health lady was in to talk to her when she was about 6 months and I came in and the OH woman asked if I was her. Then a few weeks later, I was leaving and mentioned it to a student and she said "Aww are you going on maternity leave?" Grrr.

Got a bit of a dilemma going on. We were at the in-laws for dinner and DH's brother and his fiancee were there. We were chatting about the wedding and I said she could borrow my veil if she wanted and that it wasn't like I'd ever have a daughter to pass it onto, and she said it wasn't too late, so I had to tell her we can't have children. Not a huge deal, but...Klinefelters is genetic and there's a chance that they might be in the same situation. I honestly thought the inlaws would have mentioned it to them!!

vesper

Oh hugs code. xxx
I swear parents don't think about telling people about that sort of thing Code.
A lot different but hubby's mum didn't tell him about he having mumps as a child instead decided to tell me about it, so I had to tell him. She hadn't told him as she believed it affected sperm production and thought it was best to not tell him (I'm still not 100% if it does or not, but the doctor says it won't have affected him). Mind you she drunk so much alcohol while pregnant with him I am surprised he has turned out remotely healthy.


Luckily I don't have to deal with work colleagues so dodge a lot of those sort of baby questions, due to being self employed.