Toys, toys, toys and anxiety!

jamiefly

My wife works overseas a lot (3 weeks in 4) and so I stay at home to look after our children. She compensates for this during the weeks by sending toys ordered via amazon (She's home today and I've managed to look at her account on her phone and average spend is £200-400 a month on Toys) I get real panic attacks each morning the postman comes to our door. We get 2-3 parcels a week. My 2 year old boy likes thomas the tank engine so he has everything books, dvds, stuffed toys, duvet cover, wall stickers, plastic toys, motorised toys... if there's something he has got she buys in duplicate (hundreds of pieces in track for example).

My 4 year old daughter likes girly things and has possibly the biggest collection of dolls (plastic and teddy versions) we are talking 100+ and disney dressing up outfits going, plus stickers, makeup, play tents etc etc

This isn't funny, I have to be immersed in thomas every waking hour and I can't keep up with the chaos of having so much tat lying around and still I chuck a bin liner away every week.

It's dangerous too, last year my boy broke his collar bone falling diwn the stairs as there's so much carp.

as you gather I'm seriously depressed and talking has worked. Tried telling the wife fewer, better.

paulineb_2

Your boy breaking her collarbone didnt stop this?

Ask her to stop, simple as that. And dont chuck tat out that someone else could use, if you have spare toys that are in decent condition, give them to charity if you think someone else could use them.

Suggest possibly that she gets a job that wont keep her away from the home as much.

Caroline_a

I would be telling her that any other toys will go to the local charity shop. I know of someone who did this and her child turned out to be an absolute brat - he's now a teenager and demanding everything all of the time. They don't know how to put the brakes on now, and unfortunately it's far too late.

Georgiegirl256

First off, why are you "chucking a bit liner a week away", why not take them to the local charity shops who would be more than grateful for them.

Secondly, your wife obviously has more money than sense, and you're going to end up with some spoilt brats on your hands there if you don't knock it into touch.

notanewuser

Don't open the parcels she sends. On the day she's due home build a huge wall out of them near the front door. Seeing the amount of them in front of her might wake her up (although your son breaking his collarbone should have done that! :eek:).

LondonDiva

Agree about stacking the boxes up for her to have a look at. If that does not work, send the parcels back to Amazon (you have seven days from receipt) for a refund.

hazyjo

Agree about piling them all up - and also about changing jobs.

If she can afford to spend up to £400 a month on carp, she can afford to take that as a drop.

If you're not working, maybe it's worth considering getting a job and paying for childcare. Probably won't make much of a difference money-wise, but it might add to what she's bringing home and help swing her into changing jobs.

Jx

jamiefly

Nothing works. I tried telling her and suggested she print certificates for being good (free on-line) and breaking his collarbone was my fault obviously :rolleyes: for not supervising properly.

There are so many toys that sorting for charity/jumble sale woukd be a full time job in itself and I have one already, looking after a troublesome two year old at home.

If I could put pictures up of our play room, the living room and their respective bedrooms littered with toys you'd see why. The carpet fitter came round yesterday to quote too and I was so embarrassed (really, I hate mess).

jamiefly

hazyjo wrote: »

Agree about piling them all up - and also about changing jobs.

If she can afford to spend up to £400 a month on carp, she can afford to take that as a drop.

If you're not working, maybe it's worth considering getting a job and paying for childcare. Probably won't make much of a difference money-wise, but it might add to what she's bringing home and help swing her into changing jobs.

Jx

My boy is soon to enter pre-school for two days a week (next financial year). I tried working before but kept getting disciplined when my wife got stuck at airports around the world. I have had no help with childcare at all.

tea_lover

Putting things in a bin bag to go to charity doesn't take anymore time than putting it in a bag to go into the bin.

I absolutely agree that your wife is buying far too much, but binning it just isn't the answer. What a waste.

SavingPennies_2

Printing certificates is still over indulging as much as buying exessive gifts - unless its a one off certificate for a specific earned good deed/behavouir. Your children are not going to understand the value of anything, apart from the hazard both physically and mentally of having a house full of toys.

What does your wife say when you tell her to stop? (I assume you have done).

And please please do not throw away toys, some children dont have any toys and will appreciate them the way your children (because of your wifes buying) cannot.