coworker enquiring about sexuality

AP007

Denning. wrote: »

That's a good strategy for building work relationships.

So if someone asks me

'are you seeing anyone' and the answer is no I say what? yes?

Southend1

sniggings wrote: »

why how many times have you been asked? I never have.

it's a question that doesn't get asked, only as in the example of the OP, to make the person uncomfortable.

If someone is gay but you treat them as straight, they will not get upset, and will soon put you right if they want you to know...or in the case of our very own gay guy wear a T-shirt :rotfl:

I have been asked on a number of occasions, but not nearly enough!

I can assure you I do get upset when people assume I am straight and treat me as straight! Many a young gay person struggles with this for years, sometimes to the point that they become depressed, suicidal or harm themselves.

I realise the last comment about the t shirt is supposed to be a joke, but it illustrates the point well. Why on earth should a gay person have to wear a label to tell others they are gay?

AP007

Southend1 wrote: »

I have been asked on a number of occasions, but not nearly enough!

I can assure you I do get upset when people assume I am straight and treat me as straight! Many a young gay person struggles with this for years, sometimes to the point that they become depressed, suicidal or harm themselves.

I realise the last comment about the t shirt is supposed to be a joke, but it illustrates the point well. Why on earth should a gay person have to wear a label to tell others they are gay?

Treat you as straight? What's that then?

You don't have to wear any label or say anything to anyone.

Southend1

tir21 wrote: »

Why should I want to know if a work coleague i dont know that well are straight or not?

Perhaps because you want to chat to them without embarrassing yourself or them by making a massive assumption about them?

tir21

It shouldn't be necessary, but unfortunately it is, because the default is to assume someone is straight unless they tell you they aren't.

But we don't go around assuming people we meet have cancer. Is it offensive to assume someone doesn't have cancer?

tir21

I look quite like david walliams

Southend1

AP007 wrote: »

Treat you as straight? What's that then?

You don't have to wear any label or say anything to anyone.

No you don't, but then you either have to avoid a huge number of conversation topics or tell lies!

Southend1

tir21 wrote: »

But we don't go around assuming people we meet have cancer. Is it offensive to assume someone didn't have cancer?

It could well be, if they do.

Blue264

tir21 wrote: »

But there is a high probability they will be straight

Oooo...that can depend on the industry you work in and the location I've worked in a couple of offices where over 10% of the staff have been gay.

Bullying and harassment are totally dependent upon how the act is received, not the act itself. If a man gave a woman a red rose every day, it's fine as long as the gesture is welcome. It the gesture isn't welcome, it's harassment.

I think this girl has been cheeky at best, but as she is relatively new, it doesn't stand her in good stead for her future behaviour.

AP007

Southend1 wrote: »

No you don't, but then you either have to avoid a huge number of conversation topics or tell lies!

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