What Were Your 20's Like ?

Woolwich_Kim

I've just turned 30 and am glad to see the back of 20's.

20's were horrible to be honest, I was very insecure, trying to find my feet by way of a decent job and relationship.

I did find a decent relationship which lasted 5 years and we were engaged. That ended with his death nearly 3 years ago and I've been single since.

Job wise I spent most of it as an agency worker, initially trying out different trypes of jobs and gaining experience then the recession hit which meant I stayed as a temp for few more years as companies werent sure what they can and can't afford to hire so remaining a temp was the safest bet.

I also brought my first car at 24 even though I passed my driving test when I was 17. two write offs later I'm still driving.

It was only when I was 29 (last year) that I finally got a permanent job that I really enjoy but with the amount of reorganinsing going on in many work places, I'm not sure if there is such a thing as a permanent job anymore.

However, 30's is looking up. I'm hoping to buy my first home this year (I live in London!) and travelling more. Then I might start on looking for another partner

Best advice I can give is save as much money as you can. I did, and I'm glad I did. I only saved as I wanted to buy my own home (I appreciate that's not everybody's goal) but savings is always good to have, whatever you'd like to do in life.

Angelinaxoxo

Woolwich_Kim wrote: »

I've just turned 30 and am glad to see the back of 20's.

20's were horrible to be honest, I was very insecure, trying to find my feet by way of a decent job and relationship.

I did find a decent relationship which lasted 5 years and we were engaged. That ended with his death nearly 3 years ago and I've been single since.

Job wise I spent most of it as an agency worker, initially trying out different trypes of jobs and gaining experience then the recession hit which meant I stayed as a temp for few more years as companies werent sure what they can and can't afford to hire so remaining a temp was the safest bet.

I also brought my first car at 24 even though I passed my driving test when I was 17. two write offs later I'm still driving.

It was only when I was 29 (last year) that I finally got a permanent job that I really enjoy but with the amount of reorganinsing going on in many work places, I'm not sure if there is such a thing as a permanent job anymore.

However, 30's is looking up. I'm hoping to buy my first home this year (I live in London!) and travelling more. Then I might start on looking for another partner

Best advice I can give is save as much money as you can. I did, and I'm glad I did. I only saved as I wanted to buy my own home (I appreciate that's not everybody's goal) but savings is always good to have, whatever you'd like to do in life.

Well done :kisses3:

ajwolf

I've just turned 23 so a year further down the line than you. Thought I'd throw in my experience so far.

I left school knowing what I wanted for a career and went to uni to do that specific course. Hated uni, went from the worst year of my life in first year to each year getting marginally better without any one of them being good or even ok. Graduated at 21 and finally got to start the job I'd put myself through the previous 4 years for. However the job consumed my whole life and made it hell. Ended up making the agonising decision to resign after 4 months. I've never been a quitter and never thought I would ever in my life give up on something so quickly - felt such a failure. I was then left with no idea of what to do with my career. Uni was such a bad experience for me on a personal level (losing friends from school, struggled to make friends, never really had any serious relationships, etc) but the career I wanted had always been the steady thing in my life and what I'd focussed on.

That was all just over a year ago and whilst I still have no idea what I want to do for a job I still stand by my decision to quit. No job is worth making your life so miserable for! I've done the odd job here and there since and had some periods of unemployment but I've recently made the decision to go travelling. I'm lucky that I've been fairly sensible in life and able to save a decent sum of money in order to do this.

Think what I've learnt from life so far is that your late teens/twenties is full of options. If you plan for something and it works out then great, go for it and enjoy. However I would never put so much pressure and faith in one single thing ever again. Try all sorts of things, some you'll like, some you won't. Take as many opportunities that are presented as possible and go looking for others. Remember you've got options and explore them all!

Just wanted to add that I'm surprised so many people have said they're twenties haven't been enjoyable. When you're young and things aren't going right it seems as though everyone around you is having such a good time and you're the only one not.

mr-tom_2

Pretty bloody grim, I was really ill.

The point: goodness knows what tomorrow will bring, so make the most of today. Live, laugh, love, etc.

vmvseoa

My 20's were the best beers of my life!

Catriona_P

I'm leaving my 20's in a month or so (boo) so this is pertinent for me. Can honestly say my 20's are very far from what I thought they'd be.

Graduated from uni aged 21, struggled to find a job and had to relocate back to my home town to find work (something I regret as I really didn't want to go back). Spent some time in horrible temping jobs then ended up in a career I never would have looked at (but I was desperate for a permanent job) and have grown to like my career path but not love it as much as I wanted to love my choice of career. Was bullied horribly at that job but stuck at it for 3 years. It also took me 2 years to pass my driving test in this time as I suffered from terrible driving nerves (I'm ok driving now though!)

Married at 25 to partner of 6 years, relocated again to another part of the country (big mistake) and bought our first house (another mistake). Had my daughter aged 26 and life since then has been a juggling act of trying to be a good parent (and not always succeeding), trying to fool myself into thinking I can have a good career as well as be a parent, and struggling generally with no family support, very few friends and pretty much no social life. Rocky marriage on top of that.

And debt. I've been in debt for a decade - student fees, credit cards, mortgage etc. Very little to show for it, havn't travelled or had anything like the kinds of experiences others here have talked about.

All in all not what I expected and in all honesty if I could go back to the start of my 20's I would do most things very differently. My advice to anyone in their early 20's (and to my younger self) is not to settle for anything else than what you feel you truly deserve. I feel I compromised too much and have ended up very far from the person I wanted to be.

CKgeordieinlondon

I move in with my then boyfriend at 19 who wasn't working so my early twenties were all hardship, but we were young and in love.
So obviously that didn't last

Aged 22 to 24 I was working and saving hard to buy a flat with the next boyfriend

That didn't last either

At 24 my dad died

At 25 I met my current partner (still going strong after 25 years )

27 went to university and thoroughly enjoyed living the life I should have had in my early 20s.

So I suppose my advise is don't lock yourself down , you never know whats around the corner and its never to late too start again on a different path.

London_Town

I've found this thread a very interesting read. I'm one of the rarer posters who didn't like my twenties.

When I look back (I'm early forties now), all I recall, is zero confidence and wonky self esteem. I seemed to spend that decade trying to do what I thought was expected and ultimately trying to be someone I wasn't. I had a few toxic relationships and allowed myself to be bullied by one partner which I would never accept now.

As others have said, I still feel "young" inside, but I have self esteem and self confidence now, these things didn't start to evolve until my mid thirties.

What message would I pass on to my twenty year old self? "Don't worry, things will work out fine".

What do I regret? I wish I'd saved money, as I never did. While I didn't have any debt to speak of, I spent everything I earned which was so short sighted. I also wish I'd focused on getting a mortgage much sooner, as I didn't buy my first flat until I was 35.

What am I glad I did? I've worn a moisturiser with an SPF since I was 21. I've also never smoked or sunbathed. Now, my skin is in far better condition than many of my peers. I'm also glad I started paying into a pension at 18. I didn't have amazing foresight, I was just auto-enrolled, but thank goodness I was. An occupational pension is the best thing to get going when you're young.

fay144

I was 20 in 2002, and to be honest hit it really lucky.

I graduated at 20, and had the exact job offer I'd wanted before Easter in my final year. So I relocated to a new city and started my job a week after my last exam.

My early twenties were good, but hard work - mainly about saving money, for my first car, then flat, then house, then for my wedding. By mid-to-late twenties everything was nice and settled, and I was in a good position to indulge in all the different activities and hobbies I'd ever wanted to try.


I feel really sorry for people ten years younger than me though. Not as many people walk into jobs a week after graduating now, and not many people can save a deposit for a flat by 22 without parental help these days. I do appreciate how lucky it was.

hellsbells0405_2

This has been a really interesting thread!

Well I'm 28 (29 this year)....my 20s have been far from ideal, or what I wanted to happen should we say.

I started my 20s in a relationship, by 21 we were engaged to be married and were buying our first house. Well 6 weeks before the wedding he decided to leave me so everything fell through (house and all).

After that I seem to have drifted relationship wise, Ive had 2-3 long term partners but none that have been "the one".

I got myself into quite a lot of debt after the engagement broke down so I haven't been able to do any travelling that I had hoped to do.

I started work at 17 and never went to uni, but then again I have never been out of work so I am thankful for that.

I've tried renting, partying etc the past 8 years but seem to have gone full circle now. I am much more content with a few close friends and house parties or drinks at friends then the clubbing scene.

I have also had health issues to contend with...I have an underactive thyroid and PCOS. I had one miscarriage early on in my 20s. In my early 20s I had constant panic attacks and depression as well. I still have my dark moments but all in all a much better place.

In myself personally, I have grown and actually like the person I am today compared to the timid 20 year old I started out as.

Heading towards my 30s I am looking at the saving (and still paying off) and also really trying to sort my health out. I have goals, my biggest is to lose 8 stone (having lost just over a stone).

I am looking forward to my 30s....to the family and home making stage of my life and to continue my inner peace.

Your 20s to me is a time to really come into your own, enjoy it