What Were Your 20's Like ?

NinjaSavingKat

My 20's ended last year. It proved to be an eye-opener to say the least. I spend my 20's working, working and working and dating the wrong men. probably didn't have as much "fun" as I should have. Not going out nearly as much as I did when I was at Uni - don't drink though so that was always interesting - but I could never have afforded travel and I was the only one looking after me so staying in my job was imperative for me...

However I can afford to do more now. I am more mentally savvy as well - more focused on whats important. I doubt I would have been happy to move away so far from home when I was in my 20's.. sad I know...

So 30 years old now, single and debt free I leave the country in October for 5 years of travelling - something I have always wanted to do.

I certainly don't regret putting off kids and marriage.

Brighton_belle

bobmanboom wrote: »

I also think that there is pressure out there saying that 'our generation' must be "successful" before 30.

I think your posts on this are really great. I did just want to say though that there was exactly the same pressure in the 80's to achieve marriage/house/career before 30 - I don't think it is anything new.

kansaskitty

VERY interesting thread Angelina, thanks for posting!

I am 24 and so far:
Bought first house at 21 with partner I'd been with since 15
Married said partner at 23
Finished my teacher training and started work as a teacher
Been on a couple of nice 'holidays' but were so busy with degrees and teacher training that we have never 'travelled'.

We are sort of those 'boring' twenty somethings that someone described... we do have pensions and we have thrown a lot at our mortgage by overpaying from our third year of having our mortgage so we are quite 'sensible'. We enjoy drinking and eating and going away but we definitely haven't enjoyed clubbing since the age of around 19 and we would have liked to have had a few more holidays than we have done. We also have three pets which although they are not kids they are a tie as regards going on holiday/costs e.g. paying for food/insurance/medical expenses (Shar Pei- lots of niggly costs like shampoo and vitamins not covered by insurance etc!) but we do get a lot of joy from our pets hehe.

I am the happiest I have ever been living with my husband and pets in the county that we dreamed of living in but this has all been rocked a bit by my sister-in-law getting pregnant. Obviously this is wonderful news and we are excited to be an aunt and uncle but it has made us consider our own future e.g. babies sooner/later, travelling and enjoying time as 'us'/moving back to the county our family is in in order to prepare for children in the way of family support etc... so this thread has been very interesting to me too! I am trying to be much more 'living in the moment'y because I am definitely a planner, too much. I try to take time each day to appreciate and be thankful for my husband and family and to not worry too much about this 'race' and 'competition' that it is so easy to let it become, despite best intentions.

For the second half of my twenties I hope to:
Have a couple of lovely holidays
Start to enjoy my career more and work on my stress levels
Me and hubby to become parents
Be the best wife/daughter/sister I can be, as who knows what the future holds and the posts on here have helped me to realise that I never want to look back and think that I took my family for granted when soon they might no longer be there to make that time for.

You're normally Mrs Questions so let me ask you... how do you feel now, do you feel that this thread has helped you find a direction for your twenties (or indeed feel ok with going with the flow and a lack of direction!?)?

Buzzybee90

kansaskitty wrote: »

VERY interesting thread Angelina, thanks for posting!

I am 24 and so far:
Bought first house at 21 with partner I'd been with since 15
Married said partner at 23
Finished my teacher training and started work as a teacher
Been on a couple of nice 'holidays' but were so busy with degrees and teacher training that we have never 'travelled'.

We are sort of those 'boring' twenty somethings that someone described... we do have pensions and we have thrown a lot at our mortgage by overpaying from our third year of having our mortgage so we are quite 'sensible'. We enjoy drinking and eating and going away but we definitely haven't enjoyed clubbing since the age of around 19 and we would have liked to have had a few more holidays than we have done. We also have three pets which although they are not kids they are a tie as regards going on holiday/costs e.g. paying for food/insurance/medical expenses (Shar Pei- lots of niggly costs like shampoo and vitamins not covered by insurance etc!) but we do get a lot of joy from our pets hehe.

I am the happiest I have ever been living with my husband and pets in the county that we dreamed of living in but this has all been rocked a bit by my sister-in-law getting pregnant. Obviously this is wonderful news and we are excited to be an aunt and uncle but it has made us consider our own future e.g. babies sooner/later, travelling and enjoying time as 'us'/moving back to the county our family is in in order to prepare for children in the way of family support etc... so this thread has been very interesting to me too! I am trying to be much more 'living in the moment'y because I am definitely a planner, too much. I try to take time each day to appreciate and be thankful for my husband and family and to not worry too much about this 'race' and 'competition' that it is so easy to let it become, despite best intentions.

For the second half of my twenties I hope to:
Have a couple of lovely holidays
Start to enjoy my career more and work on my stress levels
Me and hubby to become parents
Be the best wife/daughter/sister I can be, as who knows what the future holds and the posts on here have helped me to realise that I never want to look back and think that I took my family for granted when soon they might no longer be there to make that time for.

You're normally Mrs Questions so let me ask you... how do you feel now, do you feel that this thread has helped you find a direction for your twenties (or indeed feel ok with going with the flow and a lack of direction!?)?

Your life sounds great so far! May I ask, how did you manage to buy a house so young? It's very impressive! :T

kansaskitty

Buzzybee90 wrote: »

Your life sounds great so far! May I ask, how did you manage to buy a house so young? It's very impressive! :T

Well it's mortgaged- we don't own it outright, I hope I didn't give the wrong impression! :rotfl:

I actually dropped out (that sounds awful... withdrew) from my first university because I was having an awful time (state schooler at Cambridge University, got bullied a bit because of my background and generally couldn't relate to the others' lifestyles... so glad I did leave in the end! Still got a first class albeit from a much less well known university, booya!) so living with parents and commuting to university saved a packet. My now-husband also lived at home and commuted to university, we both had part time jobs for years one and two of our undergraduate degrees and saved all of our maintenance loans in ISAs and had built up a deposit of 18k by 21 (he was 23 so he worked for two years too and lived at home and we saved almost all of this too). We bought a modest house in a county where the house prices were much cheaper (for £120k in Cambridgeshire we would have gotten a flat above a minimart, in Norfolk we have a three bedroom-ed terrace, with garden, no parking). Sooooo to summarise a combination really of commuting to uni, having a long term partner from a very young age (fifteen!), working during study, never renting (our first home was our current bought one) and not travelling. Please don't think I'm saying this is the way to do it, life works in different ways for different people, but that's how we did it. Hopefully that's helpful!

Your life also sounds pretty wonderful so far, well done you on first full time job and volunteering too. I do miss volunteering but with teaching full time the kids in my class exhaust me!

[Deleted User]

Hi,

my life in the 20's was tough.

The country was just trying to get back to normal after the First World War, times were hard and very austere, but I've survived, and now I have a laptop and enjoy being here.

Buzzybee90

kansaskitty wrote: »

Well it's mortgaged- we don't own it outright, I hope I didn't give the wrong impression! :rotfl:

I actually dropped out (that sounds awful... withdrew) from my first university because I was having an awful time (state schooler at Cambridge University, got bullied a bit because of my background and generally couldn't relate to the others' lifestyles... so glad I did leave in the end! Still got a first class albeit from a much less well known university, booya!) so living with parents and commuting to university saved a packet. My now-husband also lived at home and commuted to university, we both had part time jobs for years one and two of our undergraduate degrees and saved all of our maintenance loans in ISAs and had built up a deposit of 18k by 21 (he was 23 so he worked for two years too and lived at home and we saved almost all of this too). We bought a modest house in a county where the house prices were much cheaper (for £120k in Cambridgeshire we would have gotten a flat above a minimart, in Norfolk we have a three bedroom-ed terrace, with garden, no parking). Sooooo to summarise a combination really of commuting to uni, having a long term partner from a very young age (fifteen!), working during study, never renting (our first home was our current bought one) and not travelling. Please don't think I'm saying this is the way to do it, life works in different ways for different people, but that's how we did it. Hopefully that's helpful!

Your life also sounds pretty wonderful so far, well done you on first full time job and volunteering too. I do miss volunteering but with teaching full time the kids in my class exhaust me!

What a lovely story I'm from east Anglia too! That's really great, well done! We are saving hard now but some friends think we are boring but I'd rather scrimp now for the benefits later (hopefully!). Well done on your first and of course being a teacher!

Thank you, it's going pretty well, I feel like everything is falling into place, slowly but surely. It's really rewarding and I'm lucky my employers let me work earlier so I can have the afternoon off!

bobmanboom

Brighton_belle wrote: »

I think your posts on this are really great. I did just want to say though that there was exactly the same pressure in the 80's to achieve marriage/house/career before 30 - I don't think it is anything new.

Thanks for pointing that out - I haven't ever really reflected on what working life would have been like back then to be honest with you so definitely food for thought!

southoftheriver

I'm 29 now and my 20's have been a very mixed bag...

I've spent about 65% of my twenties at uni, studying to do the job I always wanted to do. As a result I entered the professional job market later than a lot of my peers. I'm now almost three years post graduation and am about to start training towards my final qualifications.

I travelled a lot in my twenties. I was lucky to go exploring and developed the confidence to go travelling alone, which was exhilarating. I met some fascinating people and gained a lot of self confidence. I also learned to treasure alone time.

My relationships varied but I didn't really have a stable relationship until very recently. I learned a lot from my past experiences and hope that i've met someone I can build a future with.

I also had various health problems with are now stable. I don't take my health for granted and have a low threshold for getting on top of things now.

One of the most refreshing things about being older is that i've stopped giving a crap about what people thing about my decisions. Don't like my outfit? I don't care. Laughing at my hairstyle? Says more about you than me. I've also ended friendships that I thought weren't going anywhere, and gained new ones. My best friend and I are having a joint 30th and we've known each other since we were 11. Not everything has to change dramatically.

I wouldn't ever want to be a teenager again. The older I get the happier and more settled in myself I become. Bring on my 30's!

Tomcatsmum

My 20's weren't as I planned as I had hoped to travel. Met my DH when I was 21, had my DS at 23 and my DD at 29. Am nearly 40 now and so glad that I had the kids in my 20's. Life was certainly a struggle with juggling work and child care and as we were both young not having much money. We are now in the very lucky position of being almost mortgage free and finally being able to take foreign holidays. I wouldn't change any of my 20's.