OS Singlies - We Do It Our Way!

lostinrates

Need2bthrifty wrote: »

I’m don’t like the term ‘spinster’ either but what makes matters worse - I’m also the ‘maiden aunt’ in the family. Why is it that women are categorised as Miss, Ms or Mrs when the same doesn’t apply to men.

Historically single women were 'mrs' with respect and age, and young men were master.

Not sure why it changed.

I think part of it is that people hate the mrs or Madame with respect as they think its a sign of looking older not of looking deserving of respect :rotfl: sometimes its true, we ARE difficult to please.

calicocat

Happy Birthday Bookworm...


You have to play Youtube...Euthymics the 'sisters are doing it' whilst eating your cake......lol.
Edit.....and dance around a bit in preferably a onesie.
Have a lovely day.

Need2bthrifty

lostinrates wrote: »

Historically single women were 'mrs' with respect and age, and young men were master.

Not sure why it changed.

I think part of it is that people hate the mrs or Madame with respect as they think its a sign of looking older not of looking deserving of respect :rotfl: sometimes its true, we ARE difficult to please.

Yes, we can be a tad fickle at times but in this age of so-called equality why should marital status ever be questioned.

moneyistooshorttomention

:beer: HAPPY BIRTHDAY BOOKWORM :beer:

Will have a little play of "sisters are doin' it" in your honour later. Now which dance shall I do to it? Up-beat and hands in air or a bit of bellydance.

Hmmm....one combination of both coming up..:rotfl:

lostinrates

Need2bthrifty wrote: »

Yes, we can be a tad fickle at times but in this age of so-called equality why should marital status ever be questioned.

Hmm. I think its a question of perspective. I don't see married as Superior, or single as lesser. In fact I know a woman who refuse Ms on the basis she is determinedly proud of her unmarked status and refuses to marry her partner. Miss is a badge of honor for her in the way perhaps mrs is for others.


I think, personally, the equality is that people despite circumstance OR choice are equal. I would have been reluctant to lose my MIss to ms and equally my mrs. We're I to become single again I'm not sure if io would remain mrs rates or return to miss single name. Probably too lady to make any changes tbh, so would remain mrs rates by default


I am not btw, dismissing you opinion, just find it interesting that a view about equality can be so different. I feel strongly that equal is ......'equal to the same'. not .'exactly the same' . Difference and the right to be so in choice and lifestyle, in diversity and experience are really important to me. Even, if so desired, in title!

One could always do as the Quakers do and use 'friend' or something similar, after all, why divide even by sex if one feels so?

boddy

Bookworm Happy Birthday!

Been for my doctors appointment did a bit shopping. Just scoffing a bacon sandwich and a cuppa.

A house a couple of doors away was sold at auction. Suddenly a team of men appeared and have gutted it and totally remodelled the inside. Turns out they buy houses do them up and let them. Found out my daughter knows them and would trust them. So spoke to them this morning and I can go have a look. Said I could do with knowing a good plumber and electrician. They do jobs on the side as well. My kitchen could do with renewing and he quoted 1200. So when I have finished my cuppa I'm going to go along and get some numbers.

Mrs_Bones

lostinrates wrote: »

I am not btw, dismissing you opinion, just find it interesting that a view about equality can be so different. I feel strongly that equal is ......'equal to the same'. not .'exactly the same' . Difference and the right to be so in choice and lifestyle, in diversity and experience are really important to me. Even, if so desired, in title!

One could always do as the Quakers do and use 'friend' or something similar, after all, why divide even by sex if one feels so?

I love words and how they change or how we change the way we perceive them. Take Ms. I know a lot of people think of that as quite a new idea and it did get a rise in fashion in my lifetime, I guess with the rise of feminism and the divorce rate. Yet Ms. just like Mrs and Miss came from the term Mistress as in Mistress of the house/home. It was just personal fashions of the time that brought about the splitting into Mrs and Miss with those two words first taking the lead over Ms. Maybe we should all go back to the long form and just call ourselves Mistresses, though with the connotations that word now often conjures up we might raise the odd eyebrow.

Like the old Madam/Mademoiselle in France or Senorita/Senora in Spain I think the Miss/Mrs tag in Britain now is as much to do with a perception of age as marital status. I'm a Miss, always have been and I'm perfectly happy with that (the 'Mrs' in my username came from a nickname I was given and that's a different story.) yet I find I'm now at an age that people just don't ask they seem to automatically put me down as Mrs on forms and stuff if I'm not present, even sometimes when I am.

I must say I also love Lostrinrates definition of Spinster, someone who's busy spinning around and enjoying life. I know it's a word over often derided now and used in a derogatory way but I've never seen it like that. I've found quite a few Spinsters in family history. Many lost their love ones if they had them, in WW1 and/or just never found or maybe looked for anyone else. Having followed their lives I'm proud of them in my family history, they were strong feisty independent women who showed you didn't need a man to survive in life. Most of them also outlived their married sisters.

lostinrates

I'm happy to be mistress rates, or mistress lost in rates or whatever. Go for it.


My main gripe with ms is I don't find it attractive sounding, nothing political or societies pressure or anything. Re pressures of society and assumption and staus etc. in Italy I was surprised to be called doctoressa (which auto correct wants to change to ' doctor easy' so my iPad likes the mistress theme,.....) and I said to DH tell them I'm not a dr (the rest of the family are mainly academic drs at least....and DH laughed an,d explained....nope, its a term of respect,....cos you is worthy. There are all sorts of strange subtexts and its easy to think we are more guilty than others here.

We're not.

Mrs_Bones

No, Ms. just doesn't roll off the tongue as easily as Miss, Mrs or Mistress does it.

Ms. isn't a pretty word, it sounds quite harsh, maybe that's why it dropped out of fashion the first time round.

Byatt

I have chosen to be a Ms, I have no problem with it, the sound doesn't affect me, I don't think it sounds harsh at all, and it applies to me in a way Miss or Mrs doesn't. I am divorced, so not a Mrs, and Miss makes me feel about 12. At the doctors' recently, the name Miss Byatt was called, I looked around to see who was next and then realised it was me! :rotfl:

Although it's standard on forms etc now, sometimes, when those in authority ask my prefix, I suspect they think I'm being awkward, but I think it's been a hard won for style of address for those of us who want a more neutral and less defining statement. Although in many minds it does define me I suppose, a rampant woman's libber or something else less charitable in thought, but I am very comfortable with it.

I also reverted to my maiden name, for numerous reasons, but not least because I hated my married name, it was almost a deal breaker...silly me didn't listen to my doubts. :rotfl:

Happy Birthday Bookworm, :T