OS Singlies - We Do It Our Way!

BookWorm

MITSTM - I think you may have something there re: the internet access. I think that is probably what I value more than the calls/text thing if I think about it

Calico - you have been busy. I think a sit down is very much allowed! I agree that it's def at times such as that when you need a man in the cupboard

Byatt - awww I'm sorry to hear that you are still feeling stressed out courtesy of your DD. Have a dodgy hug :grouphug: Calico's thought about assigning a different tone (or tones) is a good one

MummyBobble

Hugs to all those who need them (dodgy or otherwise). :grouphug:

I have achieved very little today other than filling in and posting a form about DD's child benefit. What I'm not quite getting is that the Government now insist that they stay in some form of education or training until they're eighteen, but HMRC (for both child benefit and child tax credits) assume they have not so both stop at the end of August until I tell them otherwise. Am I missing something here? As, I am sure, the majority will still be entitled to CB and CTC why not put the onus on the few that aren't to notify HMRC? I wouldn't mind so much if I didn't have to notify CB and CTC separately. Any chance of a system that works together so one phone call would sort out both? :wall:

I've also rung one of the colleges she's got a place at to check that she can do the combination of subjects she wants to study. Apparently she'll have to discuss it when she goes to enroll after she's got her GCSE results next week.Sorry, but what's the point of going to enroll if she can't do the subjects she wants to? Of the other two colleges she's been offered places at, one has said that she can only do 4 out of the 5 A-levels she wants to do because of the way they're timetabled (honest at least), and the other has said she'll "probably" be able to but they'll confirm when she enrolls. How much pressure is this putting on a 16 year old? I'm getting stressed never mind her!

Rant over, just letting common sense cloud my judgement... On the bright side, it's Frday

BookWorm

Hi MummyBobble :wave:

Yes it really would be helpful if all the various gov depts were actually joined up wouldn't it :cool: I guess that's too much to hope for in the 21st century

Byatt

Yes, capacity to consent, that's it, thanks Calico. Not sure how support would find out if they are applying to get married, I know the banns have to be read, but not sure what that means.

I have a ring tone assigned to my land line so I know it's DD ringing. The cell phone shows her name so I always know when it's her, and I keep the ring tone off now, as it just stresses me. It's a bit like Pavlov's dogs...:cool::eek:

and yes, very cheeky to ask for money.

Mummybobble, it sounds crazy, and I can't believe they've raised the leaving age to 18! Trying to massage the stats again!?

The WTC people always tell the HB/CTB office about my WTC...:cool: The first I know of a change is from the council...

Thanks BW, I will Survive! :rotfl:albeit with a nervous tic...

mothernerd

Hugs for those that need them.

Mummy bobble be careful what you wish for. Child benefit is the one part of the whole system that works brilliantly, is very cheap and has few snags. It can also be paid for up to 19 year olds - my DS3 completely messed up his GCSEs then wandered off to the town 8 miles away where his friend signed up for brick-laying, rather than coming home to go to the signing up for 'A' levels meeting. I had to go on my own to find out what could be salvaged from the situation.

He did BTEC instead but did 3 different first years before being allowed onto a second year, so 4 years to get to going on to university stage, but by reading the small print (and writing the letters) I managed to hang on to the child benefit for most of that (helps when you are feeding a boy who nearly fills a door frame).

Another heads up - it gets worse. CTC and Student loans work on different tax years - CTC always want the figures for the year just ended and Student loans use the previous year (good job my paperwork was in order, to start with at least) although after the first year application Student loans will take applications from April (but they -your child- has to get the paperwork/ fill in on-line before you get to do your bit - and you have a different access code) so start nagging in April but (may only apply to boys) their paperwork only gets done at the last minute and (DS2 this time) grant money may not be in bank account on time.

Then for some reason (apologies if you aren't a single parent) with DS3 Student loans started to ask for my divorce paperwork (different file box) every year, saying they hadn't got it on record - did they honestly think 20 years after divorcing him and not a penny maintenance, I had secretly re-married him.

The government doesn't do joined up thinking on benefits and when they tinker with the system, they make it worse - biggest most over-budget computer project mess in the history of the computer industry? Ah well at least DS1 is keeping busy handling all the child support cases that the computer can't cope with -computer has headache.

Apologies for rant. I have finally got 3 boys through the whole system and only need to do battle again if I try to go back and finish my degree - was thinking about it but not really worth the hassle.

moneyistooshorttomention

Government and "joined-up thinking" in same sentence:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

The only bit of logical thinking that they seem to go in for is that these days people have to apply for their State Pension when it's due (rather than automatically getting it come the time). I guess that's because they are hoping that people will have already lost the mental capacity to follow-up on that and the Government can save the money they are due to pay us for that. :cool:

A topic that's on my mind, as I am approaching my "revised State Pension Age" and keep reminding myself "Don't forget to ask for your own money nearer the time MITSTM, otherwise they'll all too gladly whip that off you as well".

I shall feel a bit nervous until I have the rest of my pension safely coming into my hot little hands in case the b&ggers come back for "another slice at pensioners". They gave over 10 years notice of the first slice (ie of putting womens State Pension Age up beyond our retirement age of 60). When they came back for a second "slice at womens pension" they gave a good bit less notice than that. Does anyone remember just how much notice they gave before taking that "second slice" at us? I know it was less than 10 years notice of that cut and recall being shocked at women not much younger than myself finding they had so little notice of their "revised SPA" being "revised" again.

Was it about 5 years notice that the Government gave of the second cut? Does anyone recall just how much notice the Government gave women of that second cut?

BYATT,
Sorry to hear your daughter is creating yet more trouble. It's never ceased to surprise me that some peoples' adult children keep asking for money, even when they can see that the parent hasn't got any spare money to give (as you obviously haven't). Isn't the fact that you are in rented accommodation and still working at your age (think I recall you being over 60?) sufficient evidence for your daughter that you haven't got enough money yourself, never mind any spare to subsidise her? Still...like many people....she is seeing what she wants to see. What she wants to see is a money tree growing in your garden...so that is what she does see:cool:.

moneyistooshorttomention

Been doing some googling since, trying to find out how much notice women have been given of that "second wave" of cuts at our SPA.

Have I got that right? It looks as if women were told "We will be having another go at you" in June 2011 and this is 4 years 9 months notice to the oldest women affected by the Second Cut (ie the ones who had already copped it for not getting their SP until March 2016 onwards were belted round the head with Second Cut too).

So, there was about 15 years notice of the First Cut.

Notice for the Second Cut was 4 years 9 months.

Think that's correct...and don't think they could "come back for more" no matter how desperate they get (or say they've got more to the point......), as that notice period for Second Cut was very short as it is and people couldn't possibly alter their plans at all for even the smallest further cut with less notice than that.

RosiePuddingPaws

Sorry to hear things are still difficult for you Byatt with your DD. As others have said, just try to ignore the messages, although I appreciate that is hard to do.

Calicocat - please don't entice Byatt up north until she has seen my PM! Obviously she is welcome to go after that!!

Well, its the weekend and I have an enormous mountain of chores to do. Can anyone explain how the house can get so messy when I'm out at work all day? I have lawns to cut as well and the grass has got a little too long so it will be hard going with many trips to the compost bin. At least the sun is currently shining so must go and hang out the first load of washing. Clean sheets tonight!

RPP

MummyBobble

Thanks Mothernerd DS is three years younger so I can look forward to sorting out WTC, CTC, CB AND student loans all.at once :eek:. Mind you, I suppose Universal Credit might have been rolled out by then (or more likely scrapped completely and being replaced with something else). I'll be honest would rather not have to claim any of it, but I need it and I've worked since I was 16 years old paying in to the system. To my mind it's there to help in a time of need, and with two teenagers now I certainly need it! Especially when they suddenly go into adult sized clothes and shoes (at 13) and you're paying 20% vat on it all :mad:

I was quite impressed with my WTC renewal this year. A (very) little bit of joined up thinking going on. My renewal pack already had my income for last year on it, given to them by my employer. However, I still had to ring the renewal helpline to confirm that it was correct. I'm employed by the local authority, can they not be trusted to get it right? Actually, probably not :rotfl:

I am a single mum, ex does pay some maintenance at least, but me and the children are still living in the family home (which will have to be sold when they're both through Uni or whatever they do), so most of what he pays goes towards his half of the mortgage etc and he'll get back more than he's paid in.

Another quick whinge then I'm going to stop being a Moaning Minnie and come back later to post something positive

Last week our local bus company announced an increase in fares from tomorrow. Bus fare for DS to get to and from high school increases from 80p each way to 95p (when DD started it was 40p each way), and if DD ends up at a particular college the cost of her monthly bus pass will increase from £34 to £52 :eek:. It will actually be cheaper for her to travel further to a different college outside of our area. Not exactly encouraging students to stay on at college, or supporting those colleges, within their existing LEA is it :mad:

Byatt, I had cognitive behavioural therapy last year, largely to help deal with other peoples behaviour and not blame myself for it. It might sound silly but one of the things I had to do was use pie charts to show who actually did/said whatever it was, who was responsible for it and what I could have done about it. Then, once I could see on a piece of paper that I hadn't done anything wrong, I should accept that I can't control other peoples behaviour. It's not easy, especially with family, but sometimes you just have to take that step back. Could you ask her support to update you regularly, then just be there if she genuinely needs you? That way you wouldn't be cutting her out, but you would know how she was? I truly feel for you xx

I din't know you were supposed to clean cars, I like to think of the dirt as an extra coating protecting the paintwork from the environment (haven't come up with an excuse for the inside yet though - oh I have - it's not me it's the kids :rotfl:)

RosiePuddingPaws

I call my car a nature conservation zone - well it does have lichen growing on the wing mirrors! I've only cleaned inside once. It was necessary though as a bag of plaster had fallen over and spilled on the way to the tip. Unfortunately it will need doing again as I can see that there is still plaster dust on the headrest!

RPP