Oh come on! Stake through the heart. A little sunlight. It's like falling off a log"

Buffythedebtslayer

I am returning the money and cancelling the loan.

I still want a house but I had a sudden thought about my life for the next 5 or 6 years. I would HAVE to work at the same pay as now and I would HAVE to always pay it off each month.

That really means no fun or holidays or time to relax.


I appreciate this is obvious (!) but I had convinced myself that since I didn't do much any way it didn't matter. But then I thought what if in 3 years I want to something else I cant.

Also work is truly !!!!!, teaching is !!!!! (sorry am not feeling positive today!!) and I am again watching people be miserable,

I have to stick my thing of no commitment. hold on tightly but let go lightly.

we only have today after all.

XXXXX

Chocforever

It sounds like the right decision for you at this time. Sorry to read your job is getting you down again.


As you can see from my signature, I maxed out the mortgage last year which was to trade up from a flat I hated to lovely house. It is stressful that I need to keep the sort of job I have now for, preferably, ten years to pay off the mortgage. It's the thing that concerns me more then the money itself, if that makes sense, so I understand where you are coming from.

Buffythedebtslayer

Thank you all so much for posting, am feeling very lucky that I don't have judgemental friends and can come here with crazy schemes

XX

Sun_Addict

I think you've made the right decision Buffy. It was a lot of commitment and a lot of money to borrow. At least you know you can do it when the time is right.

Buffythedebtslayer

Chocforever wrote: »

It sounds like the right decision for you at this time. Sorry to read your job is getting you down again.


As you can see from my signature, I maxed out the mortgage last year which was to trade up from a flat I hated to lovely house. It is stressful that I need to keep the sort of job I have now for, preferably, ten years to pay off the mortgage. It's the thing that concerns me more then the money itself, if that makes sense, so I understand where you are coming from.

Yes, the job - well we have a new head and that is definitely bringing all the fun of the fair so to speak. I am ok. I will survive but that is it, survival and unlike last year when we had stressful moments the previous head was fairly predictable so we had days when it was hell and then days when it was ok. This year you are just waiting and waiting for an EXPLOSION and it is only October!

So after the loan experiment what are my plans.......

Savings. So I changed ALL my accounts - I used to have pots for everything but got really itchy if they didn't have money in so I have made one big savings account, plus one for Christmas and the ISA.

I will save 590 each month, 350 in the ISA and 240 in the general savings.

This is less money than when I was doing the pots(but more to the ISA) but I am intending to pay for more stuff (clothes and dog grooming) out of my money plus I am so tired of having not much money and getting in the cycle of spending on the CC only to have to borrow out of savings or next month's money, so am giving myself more spending money, it will just be a bit more relaxed, some months I don't spend anything and others the animals can be expensive (the rabbit ate the guinea pig supplement, sort of a medication which costs 10 pound a fortnight for one thing! plus chewing everything in sight)

I feel more settled. Clearer plans.

Pooky

I think you've made a wise choice. Whilst none of us know what the next week/month/year may bring, by keeping yourself uncommitted you stand the best chance of being able to follow a dream when the time is right.

The friends I have that have buy to let properties all have constant issues with tenants/maintenance/agents etc, I think you'd need a good ongoing savings pot to cover all eventualities.

My savings pot is dwindling rapidly with huge expenses this year that I couldn't foresee, you never know what's round the corner.

StressedSteph

Hey Buffy

You are really going through the wringer lately aren't you .

It feels to me like the job is the root of ALL of your miseries. I personally feel that if you could solve the issues with your job then everything else would feel brighter and more achievable.

Is it teaching you hate or just that particular position/school ??.

If it is just that particular school then get sending your CV off to schools you dream of working for. You've gotta be in it to win it .

If its the job of a teacher you hate, then what career do you dream of having?

When we lose a friend to early unexpected death it really teaches us to grab life by the balls and make yourself happy.

Look into re-training, you could go to college/uni and Tutor in the evenings/Weekends to help pay bills etc. If your mum knew how unhappy you are in your job I am sure she would cut you some slack on the rent etc.

Do whatever it takes to get your job sorted. After that you may have a clearer head to be able to make decisions in other parts of your life. Who knows you may meet Prince Charming in your new career

Hope you are feeling ok today xxx

in_need_of_direction

It's so brave dealing with what you realise isn't right for you, well done. I wish I could add something to what's been said but can't. Just hope you find what will give you a better life.

Buffythedebtslayer

Thank you. XXX I love my laptop friends XXXX

I think you are right Steph. The job is at the root of the problems.

It had been better for a while but even my nice manager is under the kosh. And is insidious, you don't realise how stressed you are.

Have to go plan lessons. should be ok tho. have a nice day tomorrow- in theory and then Friday is busy but already planned.

nice manager isn't there tomorrow. actually feels like a bit of a relief. That is how bad it is!

XXXX

Buffythedebtslayer

I LOVE Nadia from the Bake off LOVE HER!