Oh come on! Stake through the heart. A little sunlight. It's like falling off a log"

Chocforever

I'm a big parkrun fan. If there is one near you, it's a good way to build up some fitness and see how you are progressing week by week on a 5k course. It is so much easier to run with other people and there are people of all abilities to chat to and you can encourage each other. It must be good - can't believe I now get up so early on a Saturday.

StressedSteph

Hi Buffy


Sorry you came back to an odd atmosphere from your mum. Her spending a long time with your sister was bound to not have a good effect on her.

You must live in a super expensive area. I am in Dorset and my mortgage is £800 pm for a fairly decent home. Surprised that your mum wouldn't be extremely happy with a lodger paying £800 per month!!.

Also surprised that you couldn't get a mortgage or rent somewhere for that amount. ??

What will your sister do when you mum is old and frail and needs helping with getting out of bed and bathing etc??. will she be happy to deal with that or will she finally be happy that you are there to help your mum when she falls over in the middle of the night etc?

To me she sounds like she is purely thinking of inheritance than your mums welfare so I would personally ignore/avoid her as much as possible!.

I am trying to KM my house too. I have done clothes (although hard to throw out all the clothes that don't give me joy otherwise I would have none left!), have also done books. I now just have a small bookshelf with my essential books.

Have done paperwork, but think that needs going over again as also have hubbys self employment business paperwork in that and I don't think I have set up a very good system as within a few weeks it looks like a bomb site of receipts again.

Have slightly done Komono, but do need to go through the kitchen again as bowls and jugs are my weakness

What I really do need to do is go round my ornaments in the house as some things are just sat there because I had no where else to put them rather than them sparking joy.

Hope you get on well, keep it up :T


Don't feel too sad about your lifestyle, many would kill for it. Unfollow those that post the perfect lifestyles on FB, in reality their husband spends more time in the pub than with them, their kids have major tantrums, they have credit card debt coming out of their eyeballs and are one job loss away from bankruptcy. All guess work obviously but other peoples lives are not the perfect painting that FB makes out.


Enjoy what you have and keep smiling. I have posted all that for my benefit as well as yours as I am also prone to wallowing in sadness and doubt about what we have and don't have in life.


Keep smiling hun, and I too want to be one of your rabbit in a future life :kisses3:

Sun_Addict

Hi Buffy just catching up with you. Can't believe your sister is still being a pain Can't believe how much rent you pay your mum. Surely your sister can see you are helping your mum financially and also there so she's not on her own. I agree with Steph that it looks like she's worried about her inheritance. Does she think you'll be a sitting tenant.

I don't go on the new look forum, took one look at it and converted straight back! I go to pot when I'm not in work routine too, I get more done in the week when I've got my work head on.

beanielou

You pay you,r ma buffy more than my monthly income :eek:

mothernerd

beanielou wrote: »

You pay you,r ma buffy more than my monthly income :eek:

Me too and that includes what DS3 gives me for keeping him although he mostly feeds himself with takeaways. His gf thinks I am exploiting him - she has rich parents.:rotfl:

beanielou

mothernerd wrote: »

Me too and that includes what DS3 gives me for keeping him although he mostly feeds himself with takeaways. His gf thinks I am exploiting him - she has rich parents.:rotfl:

Funnily enough my DS's GF is the same!!!!

Buffythedebtslayer

I suppose it is a lot. I don't think Mum realises, as I set it myself and since she came home it is clear she spent loads on my sister and is worried about money. However it would only be cheaper if I shared and I don't want to do that and I probably wouldn't be able to have the animals. Renting a flat is


Am v tired. been doing A LOT of de-cluttering and have had so much to think about. I really don't know about my sister. I really don't. It upset me when she came over the other day. I can only make sure I have savings and that my stuff here is organised.


Any how I am very grateful for the replies and friendship.


sleep well XXXXX

RosaBernicia

Hi Buffy

Sorry to be popping up to stick my nose in - I do keep up with you but rarely post.

But it really worries me that you are paying over the odds to rent from your mum, for reasons that benefit her not just you, and essentially gaining nothing financial back from it. In other relationships that contribution to the household would give you a right to part of the value of the house. (It does occur to me that this may be what's bugging one of your sisters.)

I think Sparkle's suggestion of buying out your mum is really sensible and worth looking into if you do decide to stay. Even if you can't buy the house itself, maybe you could buy out half? That way you would be paying off a mortgage and in a better position later on, whatever happens. And if setting the price is contested, you can get several valuations and average them out.

Also, don't discount the idea of moving out - I am hoping to buy shortly and one of my motivations is so that I can have pets, so I'd have no problem with a lodger who brought some. You might even find someone who eg works away a lot and so doesn't have their own, but would enjoy 'sharing' yours. And when you start looking sometimes you find cheaper places - a one bed round here is about the same price, but mine is £250 less just as it's literally over the road from the expensive area and ideally needs a bit more tlc. And I only got my cats after I moved in because the landlord said it was fine.

So anyway big hugs and I do hope you can find a way of making that money work for YOU, not just for everyone else.


Rosa xx

Buffythedebtslayer

Sorry I disappeared, I finally figured out how to go back to the old forum view. So it feels like I have come home


I am still decluttering, I NEVER want to own anything again. I have hurt my back moving a hutch yesterday.


I am worried re rent and some of the things you guys have said. A while ago I was going to go to a solicitor about it, but couldn't find a time.


I will think on it some more.


Meanwhile, I shall continue with the purge!


ooo in other news, I haven't run up a credit card bill this month. The new bed and "stuff" were paid for by my savings and I have paid for everything else out of my WAGES. Miraculous!

Buffythedebtslayer

Am sorting the sheds out today. I may not come out alive.


For anyone who is interested, I am following the ideas in this book,


http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/0091935024?keywords=banish%20clutter%20forever&qid=1440324284&ref_=sr_1_1&sr=8-1


I have also read the Konmarie book and did like it but I think the Banish the clutter book suits my problem - I really don't have space for stuff so need to organise from the outside in. Plus the whole folding/thanking/unpacking your handbag thin would drive me mental!


So far
3 tip trips
4 charity shop trips.


One more of each is planned, possibly two to the tip.


I haven't ordered anything from Amazon since all this started!