Less than 12 weeks pregnant club! Part 4!!

Rambosmum

Urgh. I think this may turn in to a tear filled rant.

I clearly a little wrong in the head. I'm convinced I'm going to miscarry, every twinge, every cramp, every fart! worries me. I regularly go to the loo just to check I'm not bleeding (to be fair, I'm peeing like a racehorse so this isn't hard).

Last night I had some cramps which I think were in my uterus, I know it sounds silly but I don't actually remember what period pain feels like, my periods on the pill have been very light with virtually no cramping for about 5 years.

It wasn't helped that last night I opened up to OH about how worried was and he just dismissed my feelings. He said he'd read that miscarriages happen in between 1 and 2 in10 pregnancies, which I know, though I suspect being 31 I'm closer to the 2 in 10. But he literally just said stop worrying, like it's that easy. I've also got an underactive thyroid which increases risk, though I know if it is correctly managed then its a negligible risk and mine has been before I conceived. I've also had LLETZ (where they burn off pre-cancerous cells on your cervix) which can increase miscarriage risk, though medical professionals seem torn on that one.

It isn't helped that yesterday I've hardly had any symptoms except lower back pain and tiredness, and I know that it's likely because I am only 4+2 and symptoms won't kick in for at least another week.

I've also read that women have felt like they're going to mc and then have, and I don't want that.

I think what scares me most is the strength of my feelings, how much I don't want to lose this. I was never very maternal, wasn't sure I wanted kids, but I want this one, not anyone, this one, that's in me now.

Sorry to rant, it might be the hormones. I'm just so freakin scared. I don't know what to do. I'm trying not to worry, trying not to google, but I want to know if mild cramps are ok or not! I just wanted OH to give me a hug and acknowledge my feelings and say that whatever happens we'd get through it together. Instead he just told me to stop being silly and hormonal. I'm not a violent person but I really could have slapped him.

Cath_Ster

*delurking*

Hugs Rambosmum - if it makes you feel any better, for the first 2-4weeks after my period was late I just waiting for it to arrive. I also got cramps (still do at 18 weeks!) it's very common - and my symptoms definitely did not hit at all until about 8 weeks!

I was also convinced I was going to mc.

Regarding your age that should make no difference, I read something somewhere that says that it isn't until you hit your forties that the risk increases.

I'm sorry your OH is not being more supportive. They don't quite get it at this stage. That's why these forums are a blessing in the early weeks!

Rambosmum

Thanks Cath_Ster makes me feel much more normal.

lulu_92

Oh Rambo I feel like that sometimes as well, which is why we booked the early scan. I keep repeating to myself that I'm fine as long as I'm not bleeding and the pain isn't severe (although I have a very high pain threshold when it comes to cramps so how bad is severe?)

Sorry that OH isn't more supportive. I can't remember where I read it but apparently it's something to do with how we've already grown attached to the baby even though, in my case, it's the size of a chocolate chip. Guys aren't like that, they need more proof so for them it doesn't worry them as much as it does us ladies.

nightsky224

Hey Rambosmum, I'm really sorry that you are feeling like this.

I am sure many women who miscarry would say that they felt like it was going to happen, because I think deep down a lot of women do. A lot of women with happy healthy babies probably say they felt the same as you.

It doesn't make that worry go away though. Someone on hear recommended an app called headspace, 10 mins a day of relaxation. Its actually really good and well worth a look.

TMI But I have also found going to the toilet harder and has been giving me wind/little twinges, as soon as I go the twinges go.

LittleMoog

Sorry you're feeling so stressed Rambosmum I think it's quite normal, I've been far more stressed with this one than I was with my DD, don't know why really, but I'm struggling with it. I also do the Headspace app, and find it really helpful to calm myself. It's not about suppressing thoughts/worries, but about allowing your brain time out to deal with things. I've decided to try not to worry until I get any signs of problems, and not worry about every little twinge etc. Although the miscarriage stats are scary, the majority of pregnancies do work out x

snow_ball

Claire_A87 wrote: »

that burning fear of someone telling you you're not pregnant, never have been and are obviously a loon!

THIS! My irrational self can't shake this fear!

snow_ball

Aw sorry Rambosmum, I think it's natural to feel this way and although not especially helpful, knowing most (if not all) women feel that way sometimes can make us feel less crazy I've had some minor cramps and I also inspect every time I go to the loo. I'm not sure I'll that habit until I know everything is ok, or when I deliver!

The overwhelming tiredness can make it even harder to deal with these feelings too, I'm trying to counteract it by sleeping whenever I get the chance!

I've had my booking in appointment now, it look just under an hour and the midwife was lovely. Just millions of forms and questions and blood samples. Now just waiting for a scan date!

Rambosmum

I was definitely having a hormonal day yesterday, much calmer today. Just praying for a sticky bean, and still checking every time I wipe.

TMI questions, but has anyone else got a fair old amount of the CM?

Went to the Drs this morning, he was very nice but pregnancy and underactive thyroid is clearly not his speciality, but he did at least give me a blood test.

Got my booking in appointment with the midwife down for the 27th May, should I make it that far with poppyseed (the new name for my little friend).

Also had to tell my boss, well she asked, because I've got to have a blood test next week as well as todays appointment and the midwife one I have to book off. Luckily she's very good, though she did say, don't get your hopes up, it's not yours yet, its deciding whether it can stay put. Luckily I'm a very pragmatic person and took this well but I know other might have got very offended.

LittleMoog

Rambosmum, did your GP refer you to a consultant as well as ordering bloods? They normally like you to have your thyroid levels overseen by an endocrinologist. If not I'd go back and ask to be referred x