Less than 12 weeks pregnant club! Part 4!!

alice31

tia86 wrote: »

Alice I have not told anyone, have been tempted to tell my mum but then suppose we would have to tell OHs parents too who I find very fussy and who would probably have lots of 'helpful advice', so decided to tell no one until after the scan. Also my SIL told everyone as soon as she found out but then miscarried, I would hate having to then tell everyone so think it has made us cautious. How does everyone else get on with their in laws?

We've not told MIL and won't until after the scan. I am really close to my mum (usually) so never considered not telling her, but her behaviour has been a massive surprise which is why I regret it now.

My MIL is very judgemental and thinks that everything should be done "her way" so we aren't looking forward to telling her!! At least she lives at the other end of the country so will be out of the way. I have two BILs and they will be pleased I think but not massively interested or interfering. It's more MIL and now my mum to worry about.

tia86

Alice I think we have the same MIL! Mine isn't so much judgemental, but has to have her say on everything. Like you, they don't live close, but am already dreading them wanting to visit...and worse...stay!!! with us when the baby is born to 'help'.

alice31

tia86 wrote: »

Alice I think we have the same MIL! Mine isn't so much judgemental, but has to have her say on everything. Like you, they don't live close, but am already dreading them wanting to visit...and worse...stay!!! with us when the baby is born to 'help'.

Yes exactly- STAY! I am dreading it and have made DH promise he won't let her come in the first two weeks because there's nothing worse than having her stay anyway but imagine when we've got this brand new baby that we're learning what to do with and she's there telling us we are doing it all wrong. Plus when she stays she does nothing to help and gets me to wait on her. Normally hubby does a lot of stuff around the house and it annoys her because she thinks I should be doing it all. Wish she had somewhere else she could stay because then it wouldn't be so bad!

angeltreats

Delurking just to say that I am putting my foot down and having nobody to stay at all for at least two weeks after the birth. My in laws live 300 miles away and if they want to come down after the baby is born they can stay in a hotel - I have no guilt about this at all. I will be sore, exhausted, trying to get to grips with breastfeeding, and we'll all be figuring out what to do with each other. I do not need constant visitors and certainly don't need to lose what little sleep I might get by my FIL's snoring. Luckily they don't seem to expect to be able to stay straight away, they are reasonable people unlike many in laws I hear of.

Put your foot down Alice - don't let the MIL ruin your first few weeks with the baby.

wendz86

Just delurking too. My Mum was the opposite as she had a missed miscarriage with her first pregnancy and so has been very cautious at the beginning with both mine. I am very lucky my MIL has only ever come to our house once!

freshstart11

Hi guys

I was here a few months ago, but had a missed miscarriage (found out on the 79th of Jan had surgery to remove the following Wednesday).

Never had a period after this so in April was sent for a scan, everything looked good no products left from D&C. However dr suggested I tested - week later BFP

I have had two early scans and have 15 cysts around baby, both scans showed heartbeat, great growth and measuring ahead of what I was before, edd is 12/1/15

However I now have lost all my symptoms again...just like last time. I knew I had lost it in Jan - it was why I paid for the scan.

EPU wont bring my scan forward as last time I said that symptoms went and was scanned (last Friday) I had a really strong hb - was 6w 4d and measured 7w 1d

I am dreading what is going to happen, I am not even over the last loss....I am also a few days away from the point I lost baby last time.

My next scan is FRIDAY 13TH! This is gonna be fun! I just want to cry but cant bring myself to get upset one way or the other. I just needed this one to go right xx

alioops78

Delurking too to say that my Mum was upset that I told my sister before I told her lol. All she's asking for is weekly updates as she's in Oz so can't keep an eye on me like she could with my sister plus I've got health issues so she's really concerned about me anyway.

I asked her to tell the family as it saved me from doing it but she waited until after the first scan.

We told the inlaws and they have kept it to themselves other than telling DH's auntie the same day but we were happy for MIL to do that.

DH took it literally when I said I didn't want people to know until after the 12 week scan but what I meant was the general population and not immediate family/friends as they're the ones that would support you if something happened.

Sorry freshstart I'm unable to comment on your situation as I've had no experience of it myself. It might just be a day that your symptoms have disappeared and they'll be back with a vengeance tomorrow. Hugs to you.

17 + 4

freshstart11

I wish it was a day but its been a few with no sign of them returning

Timeflies

Hi freshstart11, welcome back to the group and fingers crossed for you. Hope Friday 13th is lucky for you.

Sorry your mum is stressing you out alice31. We're waiting for the scan to tell both sets of parents. The scan is on a Monday, and we wouldn't be able to visit the in-laws til two weekends later, so we may tell them on skype if we have some good news. They're 200 miles away and I wouldn't expect them to be too interfering. Their first grandchild is arriving in October and will be local to them, so I'm sure that will keep them busy!

Really looking forward to having some good news to tell - hope we do. It will be nice to explain why I'm feeling so awful at work too, and hopefully get a bit of understanding. There have been a few changes at work though, so I'm going to ask my immediate boss to keep it from the next two bosses up (who are horrible and not based on our site) until the date I legally have to declare it so they don't have any chance to single me out for redundancy before I go on mat leave. As I understand it, it's harder to make you redundant when you're on mat leave, as they have to offer you first dibs on any suitable role they have.

A question for you existing mums and lurkers from more pregnant threads - when was your peak week of nausea? I felt s awful yesterday, and have read that 10 weeks (I'm 10.5w now) is the worst. Can I expect it to get a bit better next week?

teaandcakeordeath

Timeflies- I think it's really different for each woman. On the next thread there are women 14w up to 20-odd w still feeling nauseous and being sick. In my case my nausea ended around 12/13 weeks but my appetite hasn't recovered. I think the best indication is asking your mum/ any sisters about their symptoms as it would at least give you a family guideline? My mum didn't have nausea past first trimester but ate like a pig. That's not much help I suppose but I hope it gets better for you. A girl in my work suffered badly from it and she swore by the reflexology wristbands that you get for sea sickness.