Stepping into 2014- walking in My Shoes with Mooloo

Savvy_sewing

Relaxed with a few glasses of wine, last night. Watched TV and did nothing constructive. Oh well. It was nice to come down stairs this morning to a clean and tidy sitting room and kitchen. Today I have DGD2, while Biggest Goes to work. Suppose it's going to be until at least September, when nursery get any more spaces. I will take her to see my parents again, as they go on holiday next Tuesday till September, so we won't get to see them. Which reminds me, I was going to make my brother a thermal bag, so they can take it out with them. Somethingelse for the todo list then.
Have a huge list! Sewing related stuff are on the chalk door. As the door used to be a black board when DGD had that room, it has come in handy for me in the workroom.
DGD has craft club after school, so must remember a change in the pick up times.

Savvy_sewing

Here we go again!
Twin2 is in bother again. She has another lot of new scroungers living with her, she's had a fire, and she's ripped out her kitchen. Her housing officer rang me, they want her out etc etcetera. It appears she's not had any carers or social workers visiting her this year!!!
And to top it all she plans to visit that boy in Cornwall again!
I am at my whits end with her.
Biggest is on the move in July, and DS can't go with them, so we need to get him a flat. Which means a deposit for the rent, and one months rent upfront. He has a girlfriend, and they plan to move in together. Argh. Anyway I have discussed it with my Dad, and between us we will find the money on the proviso that it is paid back by standing order monthly until he's re-payed it all. I know, that's high risk, but it's better then letting him move back. Which is not an option!
I'm tired out after having DGD2 all day as well.
Really really fed up today. It's another what's next kind of day.

greenbee

If he's moving in with a girlfriend HALF the deposit and HALF the first month's rent. But they could just get a room in a shared house which would be much more affordable. And is what most of us did at their age...

minimoneysaver

Too right greenbee. It's time he learnt to budget himself. I thought the whole point of living with your daughter and her family, was to give him time to mature and get some savings behind him.

Why did your daughter rip out her kitchen? Very confused about that one. Was the fire caused in the kitchen and she was getting rid of fire damaged cabinets?

Errata

Have to agree with Greenbee. He doesn't need a flat at his age he needs a room in a shared house.
As for Twin 2, sorry to say but I think she's long passed the point where you could do anything to keep her on the straight and narrow.

Savvy_sewing

Apparantly the kitchen cupboards were mouldy! She should have called housing about it, but didn't. Neighbours complained about the noise/mess etc I know that she's a lost cause so to speak, but she is my daughter and I can't help but worry about things, and although I have no idea what housing expect me to do about it.
Re DS I have agreed to look at flats and we will see. They are the same price as a room so might as well be a flat.

thorsoak

Don't forget Mooloo, as they are under 35, they will only get h/b at the shared-room rate!

Can D/S girlfriend's family pay half the deposit/first month's rent?

As for Twin 2, remember, she is a vulnerable adult who should be under the care of social services - although she is still your daughter and you understandably worry about her SHE IS NOT YOUR RESPONSIBILITY Back off - complain to Social Services that they are not doing their job - but make them aware that you do not intend/are not able to do anything about the situation - its up to them!

Savvy_sewing

the girl friend, is an old friend that has resurfaced. Unfortunately the mother is not going to help. Lots of problems with that woman over many years. She won't help or have much to do with the girl. Not the girls fault, more the mothers. But I'd rather spit on her then ask her to help, and if you know me, that's rather out of my character.
I've helped the various siblings over the years, spanning at least 15 years.
I have left a message for the social services to get back to me.
Re twin2.
I won't be replacing the kitchen or paying for it. I am sad to say, no way hose, I think the housing association will have to foot that bill, but I think they won't be doing that unless Twin has gone.
She's still planning on going back to Cornwall again. Heaven help us is all I can say.
Was stressed earlier, but have calmed down now. What happens happens, and I will just have to deal with it as and when. I realise this is going to be the case till the day I die.
Not happy, but can't do anything much else then keep on keeping on, so to speak. But now, I intend to go to sleep, and try and switch my mind off!

Brighton_belle

Mooloo wrote: »

Re DS I have agreed to look at flats and we will see. They are the same price as a room so might as well be a flat.

But wouldn't the bills /council tax for room in a shared house will be much cheaper that a flat?

Savvy_sewing

I think it varies, six of one and have a dozen of another. The few flats we saw advertised, seem to have all bills etc included, so we will see. It's research time I suppose. The main thing is he gets a roof over his head, and now I suppose the girlfriend, and I am not sure putting him in a room share is going to help them to live normally. I don't really want him to be subject to influence from any undesirables, we have only just got him away from all of those types. We will see what's out there, and try and get what's best. He is earning over £800 a month now, so he will be paying the bills once he gets somewhere. I won't be a guarantor or anything.
The girl is looking for a new job (hairdressing) and so I hope she will be contributing too. Time will tell.
Today I have to go in to the recycle centre, so I hope there are no catastrophes, I need to earn. But I also have a lot of sewing jobs to do at home. Fingers crossed things are picking up.