family names

pooki

hi, first post just wanted to know if i am being unreasonable or not. basically all of my family fell out with my sister due to her constant name calling, back stabbing and general nastiness. she has just had another baby and my mum reconciled with her before the birth. i found out last night that she has decided to call her child a nearly identical name to my 3 year old. obviously i am not going to put the exact names but for example my child is called john and shes called hers johnny. i kind of expect this behavior from her but hats really cut me is that my mum knew the day before the childs birth what names she had chosen and said nothing! am i being overly sensitive?
many thanks

mummyroysof3

I would be miffed but there isn't anything you can do about it so try not to let it get to you.

Tigsteroonie

Do you know that your Mum said nothing? She could have told your sister that she didn't like the duplication, but your sister decided to go ahead anyway.

pooki

my mother told me she didnt say anything

GobbledyGook

Sounds like your Mum said nothing to keep the peace. Would your sister have listened anyway? I think you would be unreasonable to be annoyed with your Mum, there's nothing she can do.

Unless it was a family name where it was understandable I'd be miffed, but would say nothing there's nothing you can do about it.

It used to be quite common for cousins to have the same first name. For example my Grandad and his cousin both had the same name as they were named after their grandfather. It caused much hilarity when they were young as they also had the same surname and were in the same class at school.

paulineb_2

Yes I think you are being over sensitive, regardless of her previous behaviour she can call her kid any name she chooses.

theoretica

When I was young my best friend's little sister was given my name - I loved having a baby named after me!

Even if your mother was sure you wouldn't like it would your sister have changed it if something had been said? It sounds unlikely to me.

Bella73

To be honest I've never understood the problem and why parents get so upset if another person related or not uses the same/similar name for their child.

Names are given to children but do not belong to a parent.

At the end of the day is it worth more falling out? If you want another argument then if course go ahead and complain, but what is going to happen...probably nothing your sister will still call her child whatever name it is but you will have had a row and if you don't get on she will probably taunt you even more once she knows you are unhappy.

I would suggest you get a grip and say in a loving/smiley manner, oh that's a beautiful name...such a compliment to name your baby after their cousin.

Tiddlywinks

So, have I got this right... your son and his cousin will have similar names?

Is that the crux of it?

Is that really so bad?

Your mum is caught in the middle whilst trying to repair her relationship with her daughter... please don't ask her to take sides.

peachyprice

Surely you should be flattered that she liked your child's name so much that she chose a similar one?

I really, for the life of me, can't understand what there is to get miffed about.

seven-day-weekend

pooki wrote: »

hi, first post just wanted to know if i am being unreasonable or not. basically all of my family fell out with my sister due to her constant name calling, back stabbing and general nastiness. she has just had another baby and my mum reconciled with her before the birth. i found out last night that she has decided to call her child a nearly identical name to my 3 year old. obviously i am not going to put the exact names but for example my child is called john and shes called hers johnny. i kind of expect this behavior from her but hats really cut me is that my mum knew the day before the childs birth what names she had chosen and said nothing! am i being overly sensitive?
many thanks

IMHO, yes.