Fed up

GeeBee38

Thanks everyone, sorry, i am even struggling to answer your questions, i just feel so tearful and fed up

asparagus1968

Birthday wishes to you!

it is very hard to lessen the sadnesses of life, I know. I haven't moved on since my divorce 8 years ago, though luckily I do have one child.
I don't now have many friends, or a close-knit family, so when child is away at fathers I feel desperately alone too.
thank goodness for the internet! my virtual "belonging" to something.

try and think of something nice to do for yourself today, not just because its your birthday.

sending you good wishes and a hug!

alyth

have another virtual hug from deep and darkest China.. Big birthdays are a time of reflection, when I hit 40 I'd been on my own for 3 years after a very long term relationship. Never wanted children, went to uni, got my degree, somehow ended up in China which is where I wanted to be, not just this far in the wilds!

You can still have children - perhaps not your own, although that's not impossible. Adopt a child (or an animals). Fostering is another option.

However what you can do, and you're totally allowed to do this, is wallow. Self pity is no bad thing, because normally at the end of it you shake yourself up and decide to change things. I'm so sorry for your loss, try and remember the good times you had with your partner, I lost my dog earlier in the year and whilst I can't in the slightest compare a pet to a partner, I always try and remember the happy times we had together (she was my reason for living when I split from the ex).

Try and do something nice for yourself today - you're 8 hours behind of me, so go out, buy yourself something frivolous even if it's just something silly like a shiny nail varnish. Pamper yourself, eat something you like, and remember that this will pass xx

asparagus1968

just seen the number of posts and thanks you have, you have obviously helped and advised lots of people on here! so, you are special to someone, even if you don't know them!

GeeBee38

Thank you everyone for all your kind words and nice comments, maybe i am feeling a bit sorry for myself, i don't know, I have got myself in right state, over thinking things, i will just go to bed early, i'm sure i will feel better in the morning.

Thank you everyone x

bigmomma051204

Well I believe you should "embrace" your wallowing today! So you need to find a good dvd (or 10!) or if u can afford it buy a new one (Tesco does dvds for like £3/4) And get yourself a take-away if you can afford it.. if not, then at least cook something u really like (and DO NOT do the washing up afterwards!!) Then snuggle under duvet on the sofa and eat some sweets/chocolates.

And then tomorrow, look forward - If you want children, then how can this be achieved? Could you foster, as someone else suggested? Fosterer's are always in demand - its not the quickest process BUT if you commit to it, then you will feel you are being proactive. Or could you get an animal - lots of poor animals out there in local rescue centres who would LOVE to come and spend your next birthdays with you!!


xxxxxxxx

GeeBee38

alyth wrote: »

have another virtual hug from deep and darkest China.. Big birthdays are a time of reflection, when I hit 40 I'd been on my own for 3 years after a very long term relationship. Never wanted children, went to uni, got my degree, somehow ended up in China which is where I wanted to be, not just this far in the wilds!

You can still have children - perhaps not your own, although that's not impossible. Adopt a child (or an animals). Fostering is another option.

However what you can do, and you're totally allowed to do this, is wallow. Self pity is no bad thing, because normally at the end of it you shake yourself up and decide to change things. I'm so sorry for your loss, try and remember the good times you had with your partner, I lost my dog earlier in the year and whilst I can't in the slightest compare a pet to a partner, I always try and remember the happy times we had together (she was my reason for living when I split from the ex).

Try and do something nice for yourself today - you're 8 hours behind of me, so go out, buy yourself something frivolous even if it's just something silly like a shiny nail varnish. Pamper yourself, eat something you like, and remember that this will pass xx

Thank you for sharing your story with me, and i do think losing a pet is just as hard, they are part of the family

I wish i had the money to up and leave, i would move tomorrow.

I hope you have found happiness in china, i wish you well

McKneff

You are wallowing, absolutely nothing stopping you from going for a walk, look round the shops, say 'hello' to people.


Up an' at 'em only you can do it, no one else.


Birthday wishes, for whatever you do.

alyth

GeeBee38 wrote: »

Thank you everyone for all your kind words and nice comments, maybe i am feeling a bit sorry for myself, i don't know, I have got myself in right state, over thinking things, i will just go to bed early, i'm sure i will feel better in the morning.

Thank you everyone x

Me and Bigmomma are now encouraging you to wallow! I have a very happy memory of spending my 40th watching panda stuff on youtube - pandas are my passion and the reason I wanted to teach in China.

eat crap - eat cake - please dear god go and eat a steak pie for me, I'm dreaming of meat and pastry this week. Whatever you do don't make today a day that you look back on and regret - it's your 40th. Go and kick a pile of leaves, do a somersault when no one is looking, see whether you can still do a handstand (I tried this the other day, nearly broke my back!).

balletshoes

bigmomma051204 wrote: »

Oh no

Don't be sad on your birthday! Its my birthday tomorrow and I had to go yesterday to choose and put aside a present at a local shop - have now sent hubby (who moaned that he was tired and couldn't be bothered to go) down to pick it up. Suffice to say, I am not expecting a birthday with lots of excitement etc tomorrow :cool:

Are you doing anything at all today? Anyone coming over etc??

Btw - I was born on a Wednesday ('s child is full of woe...) and in a dreary November. November is the most miserable month of the year, apart from February.
I truly believe that parents who have a child in November, are setting that child up to be a pessimistic, misery for life LOL.... thats me!

not me . I'm a November birthday, and I'm definitely a glass half-full type of person!