pet euthanasia should a child be there?

squirrelchops

I was accidentally there when they put our dog down when I was about 7 or 8.

Vet was at the house and I was holding his head in my lap - the vet gave him an injection and my Mum swears she didn't know he was putting him down.

I won't ever forget it but oddly can't remember my reaction after.

sassyblue

It depends on the child(ren) and how you think they'll cope. Our 13 year old cat was pts in the summer after an illness ending in kidney failure, our DS was almost 7. We explained what was going to happen and did DS want to be there, he said he did, so our cat passed very peacefully with me and DS holding her.

Death is unfortunately part of life and being a responsible pet owner, our DS has never had any upset over what happened at the vets. However in this instance our cat was very poorly if she'd been in distress making a lot of noise it would have been different, l knew DS could cope with seeing her PTS in this instance if he wanted to.

Sorry about Rosie pukka mum, l presume she is a cat not a car! x

Person_one

pukkamum wrote: »

I think the consensus seems to be they should know it's going to happen which I feel is right, would you send them to school that day or over to nan's?

Is it at all possible to get the vet round on Friday after school? I realise that's a week away and i don't know what Rosie's condition is, would that be too long to wait?

That way, they can come home from school, spend a bit of time saying their goodbyes and maybe go upstairs while the vet visits. Then they'll have the weekend with you and each other to recover their composure before going back to school. You could do something nice in her memory, maybe make a photo album?

BitterAndTwisted

At seven I suspect it would be as upsetting to see their mother distressed as it would to witness the final end of a beloved pet. I really don't think they are old enough to comprehend what's happening, plus I also wouldn't want to make a difference between the kids to have one there and the other not.

Understanding about the inevitability of death and seeing it happen before your very eyes are rather different things.

paulineb_2

BitterAndTwisted wrote: »

At seven I suspect it would be as upsetting to see their mother distressed as it would to witness the final end of a beloved pet. I really don't think they are old enough to comprehend what's happening, plus I also wouldn't want to make a difference between the kids to have one there and the other not.

Understanding about the inevitability of death and seeing it happen before your very eyes are rather different things.

I agree, its tough enough as an adult to go through it.

chiefpossession

We had to have one of our cats put to sleep in the Summer. The vet had to inject into her heart and it was not a quick process - not simply drifting away. I found it very traumatic and not something I would have wanted anyone else to see if they didn't have to. My children have never had any problems coming to terms with the loss of a pet - they didn't have to be there to accept it.

building_with_lego

lostinrates wrote: »

I have a different perspective.

I have been at all but two (I think) of my animals PTS my entire life including my dog when I was very young, maybe three?

I think this had a two fold impact, one definitely shaped my future for the better , but honestly, its not something I would do with most seven year olds I know (I'm not a mother). I think. Less positively Its given me an inequitable sense of the weight of responsibility of my life with animals in my life and those I work with.

I'll join you, LiR, in going against the grain.
When Thomasina, our childhood cat, was put down my brother and I were around the age of your youngest- I think we were seven and eight. Mum stayed at home as she was very upset but Dad was more pragmatic and took us to the vet too. We were stroking Thomasina as she died and I clearly remember her body relaxing as she died, and it was so gentle. She had been very ill with kidney failure and Dad had explained what was going to happen and why, and the vet reiterated the process to us. I credit Dad with helping to develop my approach to life and death and am very grateful to him for giving us that opportunity.

My poor mum and I took another old kitty to the vet when I was a teenager. When it became apparent that Sooty was in pain from a huge cancer the vet asked whether we'd like to stay with him while he was put down. Mum answered for both of us and ran out to the car; I still regret not being with him at the end

How do you react in these situations? While I understand that you don't want to traumatise your children don't shy away from exposing them to sadness simply because they are children. Good luck with your decision

*max*

I would err on the side of caution and not have them there for the actual injection. Not every PTS situation is "Marley & Me" peaceful and quiet. There can be bodily reactions that could be very distressing to see, for an adult - nevermind a child. It's always going to be extremely heartbreaking. I still think children should be spared the hands-on side of it.

Dunroamin

I think you should consider what's best for Rosie. Might you not need to give your attention to the children rather than your cat if they are there?

*max*

Dunroamin wrote: »

I think you should consider what's best for Rosie. Might you not need to give your attention to the children rather than your cat if they are there?

That's another good point.