In this situation would you have said something (as I did) or keep quiet?

annie_d

Oh Gosh..you really want to get over yourselves.It was your daughter's second birthday, which is wonderful for you but really is of very little importance to any one else. ( Grandparents excepted )

seven-day-weekend

slightlyconfused1 wrote: »

To be honest I really don't see what they did wrong. They couldn't make the party. There is no way I would drive for 6 hours to attend a party for a two year old.

The suggested visiting this weekend instead. The time to tell them that you were angry that they didn't attend the party was then, not after they arrived. Had you done that to me it would be the last time I would visit.

I don't even understand why the OP was angry with them for missing the party. I wouldn't drive 6 hours to go to a two-year-old's party either, especially if it meant I had to re-arrange my work. They came as soon as they could.

I think the OP is way out of order.

seven-day-weekend

Person_one wrote: »

Nothing was gained by telling them off, the only result is that they probably felt really awkward all day after driving three hours to see you.

They had a legitimate reason why they couldn't make it (and let's face it, a toddler's party is not an emergency, or likely to be a high priority for their parent's cousin) and they offered to make the journey on a different date so that they'd still see you and the little one.

They did nothing wrong, and you owe them an apology.

Absolutely agree.

seven-day-weekend

meritaten wrote: »

But - wouldn't you all have turned round and gone back home? if they felt offended why stay? why not say 'scuse me but - it couldn't be helped and we came THIS weekend?' why say nothing and then text you were offended?

Maybe because they were trying to maintain good relations for the sake of family harmony and would prefer to discuss it without the children present, rather than going off in a huff? Maybe they hoped it all blow over, but it hasn't? It was them who'd driven for hours to visit, after all. They made an effort. Then they get told off for their trouble.

I personally don't see that they have done anything wrong at all.

andygb

Person_one wrote: »

I quite like children's parties, don't speak for me!

Good for you - "Vive le difference!";)

ash28

claire16c wrote: »

Sounds just like my journey from nearish Reading to my SIL in the midlands! Hell going back on a Sunday afternoon it's always bad traffic so I kind of don't blame your daughter for not being confident yet. But yeah she probably should have given you more notice!

We live in the East Midlands now, in the depths of rural Lincolnshire....it can take us almost an hour to get to the A1....and yes Sunday afternoons are a pain (especially the southern part of the journey) and Fridays too.

She has gone back this morning.....and I'm drained.....slept for 9 hours last night (almost unheard of). It was lovely to see them.

I think part of the problem is we are early retired and the kids must think we don't have a life!

OH tends to blow a gasket and then that's it.....over. I'm much more laid back than he is....it takes a lot to wind me up and someone not attending a 2 year olds party isn't on the list.

FatVonD

MilliesMum wrote: »

was there plenty of cake?:D

Yes, but it was all gluten free

claire16c

ash28 wrote: »

We live in the East Midlands now, in the depths of rural Lincolnshire....it can take us almost an hour to get to the A1....and yes Sunday afternoons are a pain (especially the southern part of the journey) and Fridays too.

She has gone back this morning.....and I'm drained.....slept for 9 hours last night (almost unheard of). It was lovely to see them.

I think part of the problem is we are early retired and the kids must think we don't have a life!

OH tends to blow a gasket and then that's it.....over. I'm much more laid back than he is....it takes a lot to wind me up and someone not attending a 2 year olds party isn't on the list.

That is quite far, my SIL is at least only 15 mins from the motor way nearer to Leicester way.

Sounds like you are a good opposites attract type thing. Im normally the one who gets wound up whilst me DH stays calm he's so laid back he's horizontal but I don't get annoyed about kids parties!

pelirocco

Being a parent is pretty challenging . You were disappointed when people gave you weeks warning that they couldnt come the childs 2nd birthday party ,and had a complete melt down when someone 'let you down' the night before .

Do you really have any idea what the next 20 odd years is going to bring

supersaver2

Been interesting reading this thread!

We have a 3rd birthday party next weekend (our daughter). We have family dotted around the country, last year we didn't invite my SIL as she and her partner live in Bath (we are in Lancashire) and they don't have children so seemed a long way to come. When she found out she was mega offended that we didn't invite them! So this year we have invited them and they are coming up for the weekend, not as we are hoping for lots of presents as has been suggested but to spend time as a family which we don't do very often.