Brother borrowed 20k without consent

jaydeeuk1

I had to stop reading 2 or 3 through pages in because it just made me too angry.


I can't offer any (legal) suggestions but i'd at least want brothers kids to know about and read this thread.


I'd be happy to donate to a legal fund as suggested above.

NANANINANOONOO

I am so grateful for the kind words of people on here, I have taken great comfort in being able to talk about it on here. It is hard because having disclosed to a very few family members & friends who were deeply shocked & saddened, it has created an elephant in the room for them when my father is present, an unspoken cloud hangs over everything so the painful ripples are immeasurable.


To help others I would like people to understand the key basis of this situation that could face anyone elderly, vulnerable or who could misplace their trust. Like many elderly people my father had no experience or understanding of computers, technology or the Internet, he has no idea how to turn on a computer and in this respect is completely out of touch with modern technology, I am sure he is not alone in this.

Myself, my brother & our parents were a very close family, dad worked hard all his life & prior to her tragic death my mother had always dealt with all their general finances & running of the home plus being a mechanic my brother had always organised dads car maintenance tax & MOT. When mum died dad was initially pretty helpless so whilst I helped dad with all his weekly domestic chores & issues my brother helped organise all his paperwork, set up direct debits to pay his bills & filed all his regular paperwork. This continued for many years even after dad tried to make a new life sold his house & placed all his money into savings accounts & shares, my brother still helped dad run his car advising him on insurance cover & maintenance etc. My brother continued to keep & file all his paperwork & because dad led an active life & moved about a bit dad used my brothers address as his postal & contact address for everything while I continued to help him with domestic & emotional support so between us we took good care of our dad.


On his 80th birthday dad fell ill & for a while we thought we were going to lose him but fortunately although his lifestyle slowed he recovered well. It was at this time that unknown to me my brother suggested he register dad for on-line banking so he could monitor dads finances easier. My father had no idea what this entailed & did nothing to enable registration he simply gratefully agreed to my brothers suggestion believing it just meant my brother could view things at a glance & would monitor his current account letting dad know if any bills needed adjusting as he had done for years - he naively had absolutely no idea it would give my brother access to his money.

As with most families my brother had access to all our fathers personal details & unfortunately he did have dads bank card pin number (as do many people who withdraw from cash point for people when they are ill or infirm). So although dad did not authorise it it was easy for my brother to set up the Internet banking posing as my dad with no input from dad whatsoever. The ease with which anyone in a position of trust & with a persons personal info could falsely set up Internet banking for someone had not occurred to me before this. I now wonder if people should have face to face interview in branch to ensure they are competent & fully understand this type of banking before it can be set up - my father has never had access to a computer or the Internet.



Because dad had ample savings that had been untouched & growing for years & he had ample weekly income from pensions for his personal needs with a monthly surplus adding to his savings via standing order dad didn't even check his balances, he didn't even worry that paper statements had ceased - he believed my brother who of course he trusted beyond measure had it all under surveillance leaving dad absolutely worry free.


It was only when my father did his weekly shopping one day last year & his card was embarrassingly declined that he devastatingly discovered my brother had wiped him out & had even been taking his weekly pension. My brother banked with the same bank & after obtaining statements it was in black & white how my brother had gradually transferred large sums into his own account closing dads ISA shares & every savings account down since registering him on-line banking. Back statements showed dads current account had been going overdrawn and incurring charges & everything including savings had gone via on-line transfer into my brothers account & there were telephone recordings of my brother blatantly posing as dad to close shares. A total of some £70,000 life savings gone leaving dad penniless and in debt but an initial combenation of confusion & disbelief meant it took a while to gradually uncover & realise the full sums involved.


My fathers complete trust in my brother has been his only crime and his ultimate downfall. The recorded phone conversations of my brother posing as my dad & all the other clear evidence is apparently not enough to prove beyond doubt in a police prosecution as it would be my brothers word against dads that he did not have permission to do it! Because my father had technically allowed my brother access to his PIN number (as people do all the time) the bank took no responsibility for not flagging up the suspicious & unusual activity & decline in healthy accounts that had been previously untouched for years.

The police were keen to investigate & were very supportive as were social services because they without doubt knew & could see what had happened (as clarified in the reports) but when it came to it they were not assured of a beyond doubt conviction in court so dropped dads case like a hot potato. The bank co-operated & were very sympathetic even disclosing more than they should have about my brothers accounts but they had acted within 'required' procedures at the time of the on-line transfers so according to them were not accountable. It is as simple as that...it was dads own fault for trusting his son & nothing the law can do to bring the thief to justice.

Evidence showed my brother started syphoning money soon after he registered dad for on-line banking, his wife was still alive at that point so must have been aware. The activity continued & the savings & shares had gone before my brothers wife tragically died so this was not contributory to his activities although following her death my brother started stooping to taking dads pension & putting his current account into overdraft. My brother knew exactly what he was doing..his last words to dad when he initially confronted him were "so sue me". Litigation solicitors say the evidence would easily prove a case in a civil court but my brother must also have known under the circumstances this would not be an available option.

I hope this flags up a warning to others to please not completely trust anyone. If you choose or have to let someone assist with your finances ensure two people with separate interests are aware of all your financial activities. So many people have said 'my children would never do that to me' - but believe me my dad would have said this any day of the week prior to this nightmare. xxx

Pixie5740

Whilst at university I used to work at the Internet banking help desk for one of the main high street banks. On an almost daily basis we encountered people who had entrusted family members with PIN details, passwords, you name it, only to later discover their relative had stolen money from them. I remember dealing with one gentleman whose son had helped himself to over £15k of his father's money and gone out and bought a car.

There's a reason that the T&Cs of phone banking, Internet banking and card PIN tell you not to divulge these details to anyone. Never give these details to anyone as money can make people do some truly terrible things (well that and the fact their either desperate or an a-hole).

At least your dad has you. Take care NANANINANOONOO.

wheezy57

Who looks after your fathers finances now? He must know that he really can trust you implicitly and not your brother.

ALIBOBSY

So sorry this case doesn't have a better conclusion OP.

The only thing I think you can say to your Dad if he brings it up is to point out if the prosecution had gone ahead, or even if Bro coughed up some or all of the money now, the hurt and pain wouldn't be wiped out. He needs to concentrate on what he does have now and try to move on (so hard I know).

The only other thing I thought was your Dad needs to ensure he makes a will and leaves Bro out of any possible inheritance.

Hope you both have a lovely Christmas together.

Ali x

Mojisola

ALIBOBSY wrote: »

The only other thing I thought was your Dad needs to ensure he makes a will and leaves Bro out of any possible inheritance.

And leaves a very clear letter with the will explaining why so that Bro doesn't try to challenge it.

patanne

If only he had a power of attorney, even if given to your brother, this would give them ( the Office of the Public Guardian) the right to query what had been done. But it is easy to say what should have been better in hindsight & would not have been something you could have done anything about anyway. I'm just just so sorry you & your Dad have had to go through this.

RuthnJasper

Best wishes to you Nana; I'm very sorry to hear of the latest sad developments in your life, but I am glad that being able to post on here has brought you a modicum of comfort.

You are a good person and this is not your fault; you are a loving and caring child to a decent man. Neither of you deserved what happened.

I know that it is no consolation, but I have pointed others to this thread a couple of times and on one occasion I know that it did help to open someone's eyes to what could happen in their own situation - and thus, because of your bravery in posting your story, the same thing has been prevented from happening in another case.

I continue to keep you in my thoughts and send you every good wish. xx

NANANINANOONOO

Sadly my dad has been unwell in great pain for some 4 weeks and has now been diagnosed with inoperable pancreatic cancer. It is early in his diagnosis and he is currently in hospital having his pain managed & treatment/care planned. I cannot believe this amazing active 86 year old man was actually playing in the park with his great granchildren only a matter of weeks ago & was beginning to find some pleasure in life. After all he has been through now this :0(

Mojisola

Thanks for the update - sorry it's such sad news.